Category: Sylvester

A cat who just can’t take a break. But when you were designed to look like a clown, why would the universe take you seriously?

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Yankee Dood It

“How can I run my business without elves?”

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x6z2bzu

Directed by Friz Freleng; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by Gerry Chiniquy, Virgil Ross, and Art Davis; Layouts by Hawley Pratt; Backgrounds by Irv Wyner; Film Editor: Treg Brown; Musical Direction by Milt Franklyn. A Merrie Melody released on October 13, 1956.

Last of the shorts trying to teach. I promise. (Private Snafu doesn’t count. Those weren’t intended for anyone but soldiers)

We begin in Smurf Village. Or I guess right next door, as we look in a hollow tree that is close to the mushroom houses. Inside, we see elves. (Actually, it’d make sense that they would live in trees. It’s where they make their cookies) The leader looks an awful lot like Elmer, so let’s just call him what we all thought of: Elver.

Clever, but not what I meant. He’s just got done reading the roll call. Despite making it past the Z’s he decides now is the time to question where all the missing W’s are. (I think that’s what he’s looking for. He says it as “wouble u’s”) One little elf, (who we will call Joey. Joey the elf) knows where they went: to help the shoemaker. (Either that or Santa mistook them for his. Just naming all the jobs elves do, today) Elver is upset. That was over one hundred years ago. (No, they never explain how the shoemaker is still alive. It’s one of three options: 1. The shoemaker takes really good care of himself, and has surpassed the average human life expectancy. 2. Eating an elf every year makes you immortal. 3. Elver is exaggerating and is full of crap.) Joey is sent to go retrieve them. As he leaves, he is also reminded that the word “Rumplestilskin” is a magical word for elves and can save them from danger. The elves are indeed at the shoemakers. (From Keebler to cobbler.) The owner, (who I’m naming Sherm) really enjoys it. Mostly because he doesn’t have to pay them. (Slave labor is less wrong when you’ve got an entirely different species doing your work.) Joey arrives as a tiny glowing ball. (Since when can he do that? Is this another elf fact we’re learning today? While I’m on it, why do they have antennae?) Sherm smacks what he thinks is an insect (The antennae aren’t helping make it any easier) but finds it’s another elf. Joey wants his people back, but Sherm is hesitant. He’d have to hire humans then. And they’d probably want *gulp* payment! Or worse, breaks! He also says “Jehosophat” and it turns out this is another one of those magic words that affect elves. It slowly turns them into mice. Now spouting a tail, Joey begs for that word to not get spoken again. Sherm just so happens to have a Sylvester the cat around who is looking at Joey with great interest. The cat leaves and the phone rings. The caller asks for a Jehosophat. Now Joey has matching ears. Then, a telegram is delivered that Sherm reads out loud. It was a birthday greeting for a Jehosophat. That’s done it. Joey is now full on mouse and Sylvester is on the hunt. The new mouse runs into a giant hole. (Seriously, that thing is huge! Sylvester could just follow him in! And for that matter, who made it? They must have rodents of some kind around!) Despite the easier option, Sylvester tries to reach him with a coat hanger, but only nabs some exposed wires. Joey has forgotten the word that will help him and rushes to the phone book, as he at least remembers it was a name that started with R. He finds it just in time and is reverted back to normal. For some reason, this stops Sylvester from eating him. (I’m not an expert on house cats, but aren’t elves responsible for a good 45% of their diet?) Shem tells him to knock it off, and Elver decides to come see why he is still missing elves. (As long as he knows where they are, why does it matter if he has them back or not? We could learn so much about the Elf race, but no, instead we’re going to get another economics lesson.) Elver is here to tell how Sherm can run his business without elves. The main reason he can’t keep up the enslavement isn’t because it’s morally and ethically wrong, it’s just too old fashioned. According to Elver, older methods are destined to fail and must be modernized. (I get what he’s saying, but what if you have a really good way of making your product? One that doesn’t need upgrading.) If he buys better equipment with his profits, he can increase his production, and get an even bigger profit. But the cycle never ends, and he will have to keep using some of his gains to upgrade again and so on. (When, you put it that way, it just sounds depressing.) Nevertheless, Sherm is convinced and agrees to do it the modern way! Six months later, his shop is a much larger building, he has nicer clothes and his own office. Elver shows up again to check in on him. Sherm is doing quite well for himself. He only has one problem now: he needs a name for his new line of boots. Without any reason why, he dubs them “Jehosophat boots.” Turns out, tagging boot on the end of that word instantly turns an elf to a mouse. And Sherm still has Sylvester. Elver runs for his life from the cat, trying to remember the word that will save him, having forgotten it himself.

Well, it was an interesting experiment, but I’m not sure how well it worked or was received. Luckily, Friz would go back to directing comedy, which I feel is where he shined best.

Personal Rating: 2

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Heir Conditioned

“You, doll!”

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x6z2bzo

Directed by Friz Freleng; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by Art Davis, Gerry Chiniquy, and Virgil Ross; Layouts by Hawley Pratt; Backgrounds by Irv Wyner; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Music by Milt Franklyn. A Looney Tune released on November 26, 1955.

The second of the shorts designed to teach economics. Figured I might as well get them all taken care of. This one has a bit more comedy over education I feel. It starts off with a cat in an alley. (Quite the dapper one too. He’s got a little vest and hat.) Glancing at a newspaper, he finds out that a friend of his has just inherited some money. He tells friends who tell friends, and the story gets exaggerated. (Considering the total goes from “a fortune” to one million to three million.) Such news even convinces a cat in a cage to put Tweety back in one piece. There are sure to be much tastier things in the future. Sylvester is said friend and it looks like he’s all for spending the money frivolously. But I guess his late owner foresaw that as he is stuck with the company of Elmer as his financial advisor. It’s probably a good thing he’s around. There’s a whole army of moochers (cats) outside coming to help spend the loot. Elmer throws them out, but they stick around. Watching and waiting for a chance to snag their prey. Elmer notices the saw going around the bag and switches it with a firecracker holding one instead. He tells Sylvester they are going to invest the money. (Really now, can’t you let him have some of it to have fun with? I’m not surprised the putty tat tries to make a run for it) His pals are still trying to help too. Dressing as a phony mother, with a phony kitten, in a phony snowstorm asking for pho- I mean real cash. Elmer buys this and is all set to hand over at least a few dollars, but the “baby” ruins it for asking for 5,000. His “mother” beats him for speaking. Why not send in their smartest cat, Charlie? Posing as a salesman, he at least gets in the house and demonstrates a cleaner for metal. He succeeds in dissolving Elmer’s watch. Even if it worked, I guess all that would happen is Elmer would buy some. Either way, he shows himself out. Elmer locks the door so he can finally get the lesson going. Starting up a slideshow, (again, don’t try and learn this stuff from me.) He explains how life used to be much harder. Specifically, the work world. People would work long hours for little pay. But thanks to investing, new products were made. Which led to more jobs to make said products, and higher wages. With more people working, shorter hours could also be allowed. The cats (most of whom I think are voiced by Stan Freberg) saw all this, and wouldn’t you know it, they reform. Sylvester is not so easily swayed, and while Elmer’s back is turned, he runs the money over to his pals. In turn, they scold him and demand he puts it back. The economic structure depends on it! Sylvester finally agrees to invest it. Bitter that his owner didn’t take the money with her, saving him the headache. (Seriously though. That’s three million dollars. During the fifties, yes, but still a goodly amount. Like I said, I’m not an investor, but you really can’t let him have maybe 10,000? At least let him have one party.)

Personal Rating: 2

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By Word of Mouse

Is good, yes!

Directed by I. Freleng; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by Gerry Chiniquy, Art Davis, Ben Washam, and Ted Bonnicksen; Layouts by Hawley Pratt; Backgrounds by Irv Wyner; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Milt Franklyn. A Looney Tune released on October 2, 1954.

During the 50’s there was a time where Mr. Freleng directed some shorts teaching about America’s economic systems. Sponsored by the Sloanne Foundation, all three of them had Sylvester in them to keep them relatively humorous. This is the first of them.

In a German town called Knokwurst-on-der-Rye, (I hear they have good taste) a mouse named Hans has returned from America. His family eager to hear about his trip. It started off simply enough, he greeted his cousin, Willie and they set off to see the sights. Hans is amazed by all the technological advancements this new land has compared to what he’s familiar with. Surely, these are all very rich people to be able to afford all these wonderful things. Actually, no. But Willie isn’t exactly the best one to explain how the system works and so they visit a mouse at a university to explain things. Basically, the people who make these products, sell them for cheaper than it costs to make them. In such a competitive market, you have to cut prices to give the customer reason to take your product over theirs. Seeing as a cat is stalking them, the professor (who doesn’t really have a name, so I’m just going to call him that) slams Sylvester’s head in a book before continuing the discussion in a drawer. When the cat peeks in, he burns his whisker on the lighter they were using as a light source and as he goes to put it out, they relocate to a filing cabinet. To continue the discussion, selling things without making a profit, can work to the producers favor. If enough people want to buy his product, then in the end he will still make a good amount of money. Sylvester is able to find them easily, because they foolishly hid in the folder about mice. Luckily for them, it was also clearly about mallets. They hide in a water cooler. Can’t have a meal without a drink right? I like how Sylvester actually bothers to drink all the water he’s emptying to get them out. (No sense in wasting it.) But now he’s too waterlogged to catch up to his prey, and the professor is able to lure him into an open manhole. Hans finishes up his story. (Because I guess he came home after that.) His family now knows the ways of mass production. Correction: they always were quite aware of it. Mice have many offspring, after all.

Hope you aren’t trying to actually learn economics from me. I’m an animation historian/zoologist. I’m just summarizing what I got from this short. If you really want to know more, visit your local library. So you can use their computers to study. In today’s day and age, is there really any point in doing it the old way?

Personal Rating: 2

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Daffy Duck’s Easter Egg-citement

“You ain’t laid a good egg in months.”

Executive Producer: Hal Geer; Produced by DePatie-Freleng; Sequence Directors: Tony Benedict, Gerry Chinquy, Art Davis and David Detiege. A TV special released on April 1, 1980.

Happy Easter! My favorite holiday! And what does Easter make one think of? Eggs, Chocolate and animals returning from migrations. You didn’t say rabbits, did you? We’re discussing Daffy’s special today. We’ll get to Bugs’ another time. What does Daffy have over Bugs? Original content! Three new shorts that had been yet to be shown to the world.

Our title screen looks pretty good to me, but Daffy is not satisfied. Besides the Easter egg, there isn’t much of the spectrum being used here. (Personally, brown is my favorite Easter color) We never see the animator here. (So if you want to think it’s Bugs, go ahead.) Daffy wants to be part of an Easter parade. All he needs is an outfit. After getting painted into a scuba suit, he gets a dapper tux. He is then stampeded by hens. Foghorn shows up and sends Daffy away with a script, saying that he’ll show up in scene 49. Time for the first short!

The Yolks on You

First on our plate, a cartoon about eggs. How do you think Easter eggs are made? I’m sure you believe the old myth about dyeing them yourself. (What really happens, the vinegar causes you to pass out and you just THINK you did all the work.) They come from hens of course. Foghorn is the boss, and assigns each of the hens in his care a color to lay. Prissy is also there. She is actually able to lay eggs in this one, but they come out shaped like… I don’t know. Some kind of teeth? Her anxiety only gets worse, as she is assigned the hardest color you can make an egg: Turquoise! (Unless you are an American Robin. Those showoffs! They figured out the secret ages ago, and continue to lay that color just to spite other birds.) Prissy tries her best, but the egg comes out gold. (The short never specifies that it is solid gold, or just colored that way, but it seems to go through more abuse than an egg should, so I guess it’s real.) Not wanting to be found with this mistake, she throws it away. It rolls down the hill. At the bottom, Sylvester is picking through the trash. Tough as things are, he at least has a friend: Daffy. (Scene 49 came quick!) Daffy is not quite the friend you want sharing your food though. He helps himself to Sylvester’s fish skeletons. Daffy is first to spot the egg, and tries to keep it to himself. Sylvester isn’t fooled and they chase for it. Daffy eventually gets in a taxi, but can’t relax due to his paranoia. (Read: Sylvester tapping on the window repeatedly.) The cat gets the egg back again, and Daffy tickles him to release it. This isn’t getting them anywhere. Daffy has an idea to keep it hidden so other’s won’t find it. Paint it white, and stick it in a hen house. No one would suspect it’s valuable. And no one does. A truck takes all the eggs away thinking they’re all food. The duo chase after it. Later that night, they’re still looking through all the eggs. Cracking each one, hoping to eventually find their treasure.

During the intermission, Daffy complains to the artist again. He demands an Easter basket. The artist complies. Daffy also wants a chicken on it. He gets a chick outfit painted on him. Not finding it funny, he refuses to move. A lever is painted under him, and a rock launches him into the sky. While he’s gone, the ground is replaced with water. And with a torpedo headed for him, Daffy has no choice but to use the basket as a boat.

The Chocolate Chase

Daffy has a new job. He is to guard a chocolate factory. (Said owner is a pig in a sombrero. I’d give him a name, but he disappears after telling Daffy to keep kids out.) A nearby village of mice, is hoping to get some chocolate rabbits for their kids. They are poor, but they gather all the money they can to buy some from Daffy. He takes it all, declares it not enough and sends them away. Geez! That’s evil! (And possibly racist, seeing as they are all Mexican.) Seeing as they are all Mexican, it seems quite obvious that Speedy would be related to one of the villagers. It just so happens that Speedy is related to one of the villagers, and agrees to help out. He gets one easily, and hands it to a grateful child. (Those rabbits are tiny! I get that they are mice, but does the factory really make such small chocolate molds? On another note,) I really do like that the kids thank Speedy. He is really making their Easter special. (Don’t try and tell me that Easter is more about the religious aspects. In a poor village, the chocolate is the only thing making it different than a normal Sunday.) Daffy has pretty good reflexes, as he is able to get Speedy in a net. (Doesn’t slow him down though. And Daffy is yanked through a fence’s knothole.) And a motorcycle isn’t any help. (Not only is Speedy faster, Daffy crashes and flies into a telephone pole.) Daffy tries to corner the mouse by chasing him into the factory. He chases him onto the machinery and winds up falling into the molten chocolate. Now encased in the confection, he can’t stop the mice from taking what is rightfully theirs. They even bring Daffy’s frozen body to their fiesta. Daffy manages to break his head free, but he isn’t mad. Chocolate has magical calming powers, and his attitude has adjusted. He’s just happy to be there.

Another intermission! What does Daffy want this time? Flowers! Cue the paintbrush. Now a “Daffy-dil,” (Which looks like a daisy with Daffy’s head. Or rather, Daisy Duck!) Daffy figures things couldn’t get worse. Then a giant bee is added. (And if you’ve played “Conker’s Bad Fur Day” you know why this is bad. That bee isn’t going to eat Daffy, that’s a different kind of hunger in his eyes.)

Daffy Flies North

Well, that’s a boring title. But it is what he is doing. But he’s not enjoying himself. He decides to forgo on the whole instinct thing, and find another way to get north. Heading down to the ground he makes a three point landing! (If the pitchfork only had more prongs, he could have set a new world record.) Could hitchhiking work? Kind of. The car in question is full of hunters and hounds. How about sneaking onto a chair that is being towed by a car? Again, it kinda works. Daffy still ends up in a lake. But there is still hope! A horse! He could ride it! But it’s not willing. (A horse can drink, but you can’t lead him away from water. Or something like that.) Daffy can’t really get on the horse, and besides he really does need a saddle. He does get one on the equine, and ties it (and himself) on so they can’t be ejected. It works at first, but since he can’t hold on, he slides under the animal and repeatedly hits his head on the ground. And I guess the horse would rather die than be used as a mount, as he heads into a lake. (Daffy is forced to carry the beast out. And I guess it was really cold as he is blue upon exiting. I suppose it could be due to lack of oxygen, but that is a little too dark. Either way doesn’t explain why the horse looks no worse for the wear) His next try lands him on a bull. (Sadly not THE bull from Bully for Bugs That would have been such a cool cameo! Daffy is chased onto an airplane. He kicks back, happy to have found an easy alternative to flying, which was flying. Except, it was headed back to South America. Right back to winter. (Since I don’t live in the southern hemisphere, I guess I can’t fathom it being cold. Even in winter, won’t it be at least seventy degrees?)

Well, that’s all for the new shorts. Daffy tries to get even with the paintbrush by shaving its bristles, but it shaves him instead. He is then painted inside an Easter egg. The brush is nice enough to paint a door on it. (Despite the fact it painted a sign to not open until next Easter.) Daffy tries to escape, but seeing the brush outside, he decides its better to just wait. (Being a bird, living in an egg is probably very soothing.)

Personal Rating: 3

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Hippety Hopper

“A mouse as big as me!”

Directed by Robert McKimson; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by Pete Burness, John Carey, Charles McKimson, and Phil DeLara; Layouts by Cornett Wood; Backgrounds by Richard H. Thomas; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Carl W. Stalling. A Merrie Melody released in 1949.

I just love how many shorts titles were just a characters name. It wasn’t even their first appearance when it happened.

Anyway, a mouse is about to commit suicide. Since it’s not being treated as a joke, it’s not funny. Luckily for him, he is saved. Hippety may be young, but he knows that ending yourself is never the answer. The mouse (Who needs a name. I’ll call him Mini. Mini the mouse. Completely origina.l) asks his new friend (who he thinks is a giant mouse) to help him get even with the one who caused his depression in the first place: Sylvester the cat. Hippety agrees.

Mini wakes Sylvester up and threatens to take vitamins and grow to match his size. Sylvester laughs at this, but soon sees the joey and freaks out. Mini kind of ruins things by coming back to say he warned him. I guess mice just fluctuate in size? Is that what rats really are? Whatever. Sylvester tries to fight off the “mouse” anyway and it goes about as well as you’d expect. A bulldog witnesses this and refuses to let Sylvester be treated as such. If the dog has a job of protecting the house, the cat has to do his job of mousing. Sylvester is thrown back in.

He tackles Hippety and goes for a bumpy ride before once again ending up outside. He tries to explain that a giant mouse is doing this to him. The dog sends him back with some glasses to prove he’s seeing things. Besides, no one hits a guy with glasses on. Oh wait, Australians have no qualms about such things. (Or at least babies don’t.) The dog finally decides to take care of things himself. He sees Sylvester wasn’t kidding, but refuses to let a “mouse” kick him out. Hippety tries, but the dog has some great upper body strength and doesn’t budge. It takes a bite from Mini to get him to lose his footing and become kick-able.

Mini threatens to pin his ears back if he comes back in. Despite what just happened, the dog calls his bluff and says he’ll take up ballet the day a mouse pins his ears back. And then he ends up with pinned ears. He does keep his word, but the jerk is so insecure that he forces Sylvester to do it with him. The two dance off into the distance.

Personal Rating: 3

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Satan’s Watin’

“I’m not takin’ anymore chanceth with you!”

Directed by I. Freleng; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by Virgil Ross, Arthur Davis, Manuel Perez, and Ken Champin; Layouts by Hawley Pratt; Backgrounds by Irv Wyner; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Carl W. Stalling. A Looney Tune released in 1954.

Another one of the 100 greatest! And don’t let the fact that the cartoon says Tweety is the star here, make you believe it. He’s but a means to an end. This is strictly Sylvester’s short.

While doing the usual chase thing up on a building, Sylvester skids off the edge. But by using a couple of Tweety’s feathers, he manages to fly his way back up to safety. Tweety thanks him for returning them. Without those, Sylvester plummets. While it is true that cats land on their feet, gravity is still accounted for. With that pulling down on him, Sylvester smashes into the pavement. He’s dead.

I’m not joking. His soul actually leaves his body. Two different escalators also appear. Any newly deceased being would choose the one going up, but it’s roped off. Sylvester has no choice but to take the one going down. In Hell, the devil (or one of his minions shaped like a bulldog) welcomes the cat. Looking him up in his book, the devil dog finds Sylvester is indeed supposed to be here. Why? For trying to eat? Or do all cats go to Hell? In the real world, I’m not complaining. But I love Sylvester! This hardly seems fair. Seems an eternity of being mauled by satanic dogs awaits him.

There’s just one catch: since cats have nine lives, nothing happens until the rest of them show up. So I guess cats just go to Hell then. What if his other lives were (whatever the divine powers that be in this short) deem good? Doesn’t matter. Back on Earth, the second coming of Sylvester occurs. He reuses to chase Tweety anymore. (Not that it matters) Satan tempts him into it though, and the chase leads right in front of a steamroller. Sylvester’s second life sits next to his first, flat as the day he died. (Shouldn’t Tweety have died there too?)

Sylvester three is told by Satan that having seven lives left means he’s lucky, and he chases the bird into an amusement park and into a haunted house. He is literally scared to death. Life three remains pale as a ghost. (Sadly, this ends the lives all looking different. But I guess that would be too morbid to continue, because…) After coming to again, the fourth reiteration of the cat chases the canary into a shooting gallery. This was a different time, as those guns fire real bullets and lives 4-7 end up wasted. Tweety hops on a roller coaster, with Sylvester waiting with a club. Failing to keep his body in the vehicle at all times is what costs him life #8.

Still thinking he has a choice in the matter, Sylvester runs off vowing to give up the chase for real, this time. He decides to spend the remainder of his days in a bank vault. (I guess he knows by now that he’s screwed, so he might as well make his time last. It might be boring, but at least it’ll be peaceful.) That night, some burglars come into the bank, aiming to blow open the safe with nitroglycerin. If playing Crash Bandicoot has taught me anything, it’s that that stuff is a good way to get yourself killed. Surprise! They get themselves killed. And robbing a bank was enough to seal their fate, and down they go. Unfortunately for him, Sylvester was caught in the crossfire. Whoops.

Personal Rating: 4

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Jumpin’ Jupiter

“The stars are so bright tonight, you can almost touch em.”

M-m-m-m-men from Mars’s next door neighbor!

Directed by Charles M. Jones; Story by Michael Maltese; Animation by Ken Harris, Keith Darling, Abe Levitow and Richard Thompson; Effects Animation by Harry Love; Layouts by Robert Givens; Backgrounds by Philip DeGuard; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Music by Carl Stalling. A Merrie Melody released in 1955.

You are traveling through an animated area. An area of wisecracking rabbits, egotistical ducks, fanatic coyotes and homicidal canaries. Behind any door could be a train speeding towards you, and when you walk outside you must beware of falling anvils. It’s as clear as the pie on your face. You have just entered: The Wacky Zone.

Submitted for your approval, is the tale of one Porky T. Pig. He is out camping in a desert with his cat, Sylvester. Said cat is terrified. There are coyotes around, and coyotes will eat cats. But little does he know that soon he will have much more extreme fears.

Porky, does not worry about his cat possibly dying and leaves him outside the tent while he sleeps. Despite his worry, Sylvester does manage to get some shuteye. As they slumber, a flying saucer spots the campsite. Landing, we learn it is from Jupiter and on a mission to collect samples of Earth life. The pilot of said craft comes out, and doesn’t he look familiar? It’s one of the instant Martians that Marvin is so fond of using! (Never buy Instant Martians from Craigslist.) Liking what he sees, (I’m guessing. He doesn’t emote much.) He gets back in his ship and burrows under the campsite. With the plot of land safely on top, he flies back into space. (Which seems to be full of bubbles.) The lack of oxygen doesn’t bother Porky, but the lack of heat does and he grabs another blanket.

The Instant Jupiterian comes out to check on his specimens and Sylvester panics. Unlike in other encounters they have together, he actually gets Porky to see the object of his fear. Porky is so cool, he doesn’t even bat an eye. He tells the (man?) that he’ll look at his wares in the morning, pointing out to us that the stranger was a Navajo. I don’t think that was racist. Porky isn’t one to be…

Hey! I already excused this!

As I was saying: Porky goes back to sleep, while Sylvester continues to hide under the bed. The Jupiter (man created by) Jones goes back to his ship to read up on Earth life. Only now do they seem to be free from Earth’s gravitational pull, as everything on the ship begins to drift away. (Except the dirt. I guess there’s magnets in it.) Porky and his belongings float down to ground just as he wakes up. Nothing like a good nights sleep to make the world look new. He even sees a planet he’s never seen before in the sky. (I’ve played Kirby 64. I think it’s called Shiver Star.) He packs up camp and drives off with his pal Sylvester. Unaware they are being watched by the natives of the planet. Unaware that he is no longer on Earth.

Porky Pig. A mild mannered Earthling. He survived his close encounter of the second kind, and lived to tell about it. However, he just might soon find that things will never be the same. They never are, here in: The Wacky Zone.

Personal Rating: 4

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Crowing Pains

“Where are we taking me, boy?”

Directed by Robert McKimson; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by John Carey, I. Ellis, Charles McKimson and Manny Gould; Layout by Cornett Wood; Backgrounds by Richard H. Thomas; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Carl W. Stalling. A Looney Tune released in 1947.

Still being early in Foghorn’s career, (this was only his second appearance) this short is credited as starring Henery Hawk. In fact, Foghorn isn’t even trying to annoy the dog here. It’s Sylvester of all characters. After a chase has left the dog hanging by his neck, Sylvester readies an axe. (Geeze! Foghorn was never this bloodthirsty.) Proving to me that he finds heckling the dog all in good fun, Foghorn appears in the nick of time and takes the head off the axe. He berates the cat who, frustrated that he can’t get a word in edgewise, smacks him over the head and departs.

Enter Henery. Wanting a chicken to eat, he grabs Foghorn and makes for home. Foghorn points out a mistake. He is not a chicken. As we all know, Chickens have black fur. Sylvester has black fur. Sylvester is therefore a chicken. To help him get close, Foghorn gives Henery a plastic egg to wear and sends him on his way. Finding the egg underneath his person, Sylvester is overjoyed to find he is a mother. There’s something wrong here. Males can’t be mothers. Sylvester is male. Sylvester is therefore no mother. He tries to run away, but Henery is on him like white on snow. (Not all rice is white you know.)

Henery shows himself when Sylvester tries to hammer him dead. He wants the chicken to come quietly but Sylvester claims to not be a chicken. I’m pretty sure he is. If he’s not, then who is? Foghorn? That’s just silly. Sylvester, Foghorn, and the Barnyard Dawg (for no real reason) all argue over who is supposed to be dinner. (Me personally, I prefer cats.) Henery then gets an idea. Roosters are supposed to crow at dawn. Those three are males. Roosters are males. Therefore, if one of them is a rooster (which is a chicken) all they have to do to find out is watch the sunrise.

Come the next morn, we find crowing coming from the rooster: Sylvester! Henery drags him away. Not seeing the ventriloquism book Foghorn has. Wait… Darn it! I had it all backwards! The dog was the chicken!

Personal Rating: 3

Don’t expect an update next Tuesday. No, I’m not going anywhere again. My work schedule has changed and I’m sick of working around my blogging. So, from now on, I’ll be updating on Sunday’s like I should have been doing since day 1. So if you enjoy this place, (and I know you all do) you’ll be pleased to find the next post earlier than next week. Dr. Foolio, out.

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Bugs Bunny’s Looney Christmas Tales

“Merry Christmas to all!”

Looks like Daffy DID find a way out of his mess before Christmas.

Executive Producer: Hal Geer; Bugs Bunny sequences Produced and Directed by Friz Freleng; Road Runner sequence Produced and Directed by Chuck Jones; Written by Friz Freleng, Chuck Jones, John Dunn, and Tony Benedict; Sequence Directors: Tony Benedict, Bill Perez, David Detiege, and Art Vitello; Voices by Mel Blanc and June Foray; Music by Doug Goodwin. Released in 1979.

Happy Holidays! Here’s a Christmas special that stars all your favorites! (Except Daffy.) It starts with Bugs having some problems with his carolers. Besides Ehlmuh’s obvious speech pwobwems, we h-have P-P-P-Porky s-st-st-s-st- having problems spitting out the words, Fog-ah say, Foghorn getting off the beat. Music that is! Et Pepe chante “Alouette” à la place. The only one who wouldn’t have a problem is Sam, but for whatever reason, he declines to ‘fa-la-la’. (Why though? We clearly saw him singing a few seconds ago.) Well, they make up for it with heart. We’ve got three new shorts made specifically for this program to enjoy.

“Bugs Bunny’s Christmas Carol”

Not as good as “Bah, Humduck!” in my opinion, but enjoyable nonetheless.

Scrooge is played by Sam with Porky as Bob Cratchit. Bugs is playing Fred. Kind of. He comes in to the establishment and annoys Sam with mistletoe. He also gives Porky some much needed coal to warm himself with. But Sam’s cat, Sylvester sees the pig warming himself, (Although it looks like Porky is smacking his butt at the cat.) and alerts his master. Sam angrily takes it back. Bugs next comes in with Elmer, Foghorn, and Pepe to sing but Sam has reached his breaking point. He throws them all out and fires Porky. (Don’t make me leave Red Hot Ryder‘s head in your bed, Sam.)

Grateful for Bug’s efforts regardless, Porky invites him to dinner. Porky naturally has a family of his own. (A stud like him? It was easy!) His wife is Petunia of course. (You know, according to Walt, Mickey and Minnie are married. I’m going to say that Porky and Petunia are too. It’s canon now.) They have three children. (‘Atta boy, Porky!) One I’m going to guess is played by his nephew, Cicero, from the comics, the girl is most likely Priscilla, debuting here, and the last is Tiny Tim. Played by Tweety. Apparently, he’s so small because he is only fed birdseed. (Porky!) But Sam’s evil deeds are not over, as he forecloses the mortgage on Porky’s house. Since I’m not born yet to let Porky’s family move in with me, it’s up to Bugs to save the day.

He tries the kind way first with more carols, but Sam chases them away. Well, that was the diplomatic approach, guess there’s no other choice but the hard way. Now that he’s awake, Sam tries to relax with a hot bath. Not wanting him to burn himself, Bugs thoughtfully fills the bath up with snow. Later, Bugs dresses as a ghost to scare Sam. (Seeing as how he probably never had a partner, he doesn’t pretend to be anyone Sam knew.) While searching for the source of the noise, Sam trips over Sylvester and they both end up outside.

Returning back to his warm bed, Sam agrees to let Sylvester stay with him. That’s sweet. But Sylvester and his color-changing nose beat it when Bugs appears before them. He tells Sam that he is taking him to see the man in the red suit. Although it’s not Santa as Sam hopes, that guess was only one letter off. Fearing for his soul, (although I do wonder what would have happened if Sam called Bug’s bluff,) he dresses as Santa and gives money to everyone he sees. He even makes Porky his partner! A Christmas feast is enjoyed by all! (Sam still doesn’t like kisses though.)

After the commercial break, Bugs compliments Sam on his acting. Sam admits that his acting was just that, and starts demanding his stuff back. Meanwhile, the feast is being watched by two sets of hungry eyes. Them belonging to Wile E. and the Road Runner. Seeing as they’re not invited, Wile E. chases the bird into our next short.

“Freeze Frame”

Wile E. is reading a fascinating book: “Everything you’ve wanted to know about roadrunners but were afraid to ask” (That’s on my Christmas list.) Turns out, being a desert animal, the Roadrunner (Semper Food-Ellus) can’t function in cold climates. So Wile E. (Grotesques Appetitus) orders a machine that can make snow. It only lands on the coyote, so he just switches some signs around. Even though the short “Beep, Beep” said that roadrunners can’t read, the bird follows the sign pointing to the desert and ends up on top of a mountain.

He really is out of his element, and ends up stranded on some ice. Wile E. skates over, but ends up sawing a hole around the bird. Seeing as this a cartoon, everything surrounding the cut part sinks, and the bird surfs back to shore. He next orders some sled dogs to help him chase down his prey. The poor things are kept in a crate with no air holes! So naturally, they’re a little cranky. (That, and it appears that they love Coyote meat.) Riding a rocking horse with a lasso only gets himself tied up and landing on some train tracks, and trying to crush the bird with a snowball had him get caught in it and soaring off a cliff. He wishes us a Merry Christmas before the short ends.

Back with Bugs he has his carolers hold a note. It’s then that his nephew, Clyde, reminds him of his promise to tell him a story. Clyde really was a character in a couple of shorts. But there he was voiced by Blanc, and here I think he is voiced by Ms. Foray, seeing as he sounds a lot like Rocket J. Squirrel. Seeing that his carolers are gasping for breath from the note sustaining, Bugs dismisses them and decides now is a great time to go tell said story.

“Fright before Christmas”

Up at the North Pole, Santa is waiting for his suit to finish drying. (Since it is air-drying, I think he’s not going to be too happy to wear it.) Meanwhile some pilots are flying their cargo over the North Pole. Contents: One Tasmanian Devil. (Aside from the plot, for what reason are they flying this animal over the Pole? Where is he being delivered to?) He breaks free and jumps out of the plane. (Don’t worry, he grabbed a parachute.) He lands in Santa’s suit and gets launched into his sleigh. Scared, the deer try to run off taking Taz along for the ride.

Meanwhile in an actual house, (I guess it belongs to Clyde’s parents. Or Bugs just prefers a roof over his head in Winter.) Bugs is reading Clyde “The Night Before Christmas” Everything seems to be just like in the poem. Except there is a mouse stirring: Speedy with his cocoa. When they hear “Santa” up on the roof, Bugs sends his nephew to bed. Taz comes down the chimney, and Bugs offers him plenty of food. By sheer coincidence, he has deviled ham, deviled eggs, and devils food cake! Not really. He just has milk and cookies. Taz takes them anyway, and begins to eat just about everything else in the house, while Bugs reads him Clyde’s outrageous Christmas list. Which among other things, demands a solid gold football, and a little brother. You’d think as a rabbit, he’d already have both. (Aren’t rabbits well known to be associated with their young and karats?)

Seeing as “Santa” is still hungry, Bugs offers to make him some popcorn. Impatient as he is, Taz eats it before its popped. Probably shouldn’t have done so in front of a roaring fireplace. He then makes to open a gift that is clearly not for him. Bugs sets up a holiday gift exchange and offers him to trade for a much bigger gift. He unwraps it outside at Bug’s suggestion and finds just what he wanted: more food. Well, it’s really a self inflating raft, but Taz has a strong imagination. He floats away and Clyde, (who I guess was secretly witnessing the whole thing) bemoans the fact that “Santa” left without giving him anything. (I hate when kids act that way. From now on, he only gets birdseed to eat.) Bugs and him then decide to return his sleigh. Not only is it the right thing to do, Santa just might let Clyde get first pick at the presents.

We end with Bugs and his carolers (Foghorn’s head is white for some reason) getting a sleigh ride from Taz. It’s kinda weird seeing him being used by Friz, but poor Bob had been dead by two years at this point, so he couldn’t really help out. It’s a nice gesture but it still ends with Taz eating the sleigh. (My favorite part is how they didn’t notice it happening.)

Personal Rating: 3

Merry Christmas from your own, Dr. Foolio! I’ll be checking in one more time before the year ends! Enjoy those holidays!

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Tweety and the Beanstalk

“Acres and acres of Tweety Bird!”

His, you understand? His! All His!

Directed by Friz Freleng; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by Virgil Ross, Gerry Chiniquy, and Art Davis; Layouts by Hawley Pratt; Film Editor: Treg brown; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc. (Uncredited: June Foray); Musical Direction by Milt Franklyn. Released in 1957.

This short doesn’t bother with any kind of cow, it cuts straight to Jack’s mother’s angry shouts about him giving up a whole cow for five beans. (At least he got five, most stories I’ve heard have him getting three.) Regardless, she throws them out where they land underneath a sleeping Sylvester. Only one grows, (well, there is only one stalk) and takes him and his bed up into the clouds coming to a rest on some land in the sky. (I’ve always wondered about that too. Why is there more land in the sky? Is it another planet? The moon from Majora’s Mask? Angel Island from Sonic?)

Waking up, the cat walks off and finds a castle. Ignoring most sentient being’s reactions to run away, he heads on over. He finds a treasure worth way more than a goose: A King-sized Canary! He wastes no time in grabbing the creature that’s roughly his size. Tweety doesn’t fight back. Then again, if I was being carried off by a cat that was as tall as me, I’d probably be in shock too. Before he can dig in, Tweety’s giant owner comes back and Sylvester is forced to flee. The giant puts his bird back in his cage and hangs it from the ceiling. So does he know that something was trying to hurt his bird? It’s not like putting Tweety up higher will keep him any safer from getting out.

Sylvester begins planning to get his meal, barely avoiding waking a giant bulldog in the process. He casts a fishing line over a rafter and ties the other end to his tail. It seems to work, but the line comes undone and he crashes to the floor. Somehow, this wakes up the dog. (I just don’t think Sylvester would make such a loud noise.) Sylvester hides in a mouse hole but leaves upon seeing a kangaroo. Oh, no. It’s actually a giant mouse. I always get the two mixed up. He tricks the dog into another room before retrying. Tying a screwdriver to a pole he manages to unscrew the bottom of the cage, but is flattened; Tweety staying safe on his swing.

He tries riding a champagne cork up, but mis-aims and gets stuck in a hole in the ceiling. He jumps on it but lands both of them in a gun which fires them both back into a hole. He finds a saw that’s his size up there. (I guess Jack never made it out in this version) and cutting a hole in the cork, he lowers himself down via a similar sized rope, but the dog somehow came back and slams him between some cymbals. Recovering, he tricks the dog into the other room again. He sets up a catapult or rahter, a cat-apult, (It’s an old joke, but it’s okay to laugh) made of a spatula and an apple. It actually works and he grabs the bird, but the apple lands on him and if that’s not bad enough, the giant comes back.

He chases after the cat. Any pet owner would do the same. Climbing down the beanstalk Sylvester gets an axe and chops the stalk down. The giant lands on him though, and the shock sends the cat through the earth and down to china. (No matter where you dig in fiction, you will end up in China.) There he is spied by a racially insensitive Chinese Tweety. Well at least he’s not too bad; just slanty eyes and a coolie hat. At least they didn’t give him buck teeth. Or a buck beak I guess.

Personal Rating: 3