The Three Little Bops

“I wish my brother, George, was here.”

Now then, once upon a time,

(Just like the short, this post’s in rhyme.)

Their first tale may have ended, but the three pigs aren’t done,

as now they play awesome music for everyone.

At first, everything seemed like it would be all right,

then the wolf came into the club that night.

But he doesn’t want to eat them, he just shakes their hands.

And poof! Nothing to it! He’s a part their band.

But his music just isn’t to the crowds liking,

so the pigs throw him out, as fast as lightning.

The wolf is mad and blows the place down.

(Does everyone build places of straw in this town?)

The pigs next play in a building made of sticks,

but the wolf comes back for more horn tricks.

He’s cast out again, and again destroys the club,

and the pigs are fed up with the hubbub.

They go to play at a place that is wisely built of bricks,

(which, incidentally was built in 1776)

No wolves are allowed in this here joint,

but the wolf sneaks in at a later point.

His disguises hide his body, but his music still is crap,

so he opts to pull out a TNT trap.

He lights the thing, and starts to run, but it blows him up, and well,

he’s gone and gotten himself stuck down in hell.

But to play cool music, you got to get hot,

and that was one thing the wolf was not.

So via the afterlife he gets to play with the pigs until they’re done,

we end (no “That’s all folks!”) with the new and improved Three little Bops plus one.

Personal Rating: 4

The Hep Cat

“Say, are you followin me?”

In this, the first Looney Tune in color, (the ones before were Merrie Melodies) A cat walks by a doghouse to the tune of “5 o clock whistle.” The dog (Willoughby, but he is here named Rosebud) chases after him, but fails. A bird tells him he almost got the cat, but the dog says that this happens every night. Out of danger, the cat begins to sing about how irresistible he is to females. Cue girl.

This cat is creepy! Look! Her feet have stilettos! She literally gives him the cold shoulder, but his luck seems to change when he gets a note calling him over the fence. He gleefully runs over, only to run into Rosebud and they chase again. Later, he sees a hot girl and begins to make out with her. He doesn’t realize its Rosebud with a puppet until its too late. They chase again, and the cat loses the dog on a clothesline. He goes back to his make out session. (Okay, that puppet is hot.) The bird comes back to tell him its not real. This does not bother him in the slightest.

Personal Rating: 3

Book Revue

“It’s Frankie!”

Warner bros. did a lot of cartoons where books come to life and this may be their last one, but it’s probably their finest. (It was directed by Clampett after all)

It’s midnight and all things literature have sprung to life. A Cherokee strip causes the sea wolf to howl and the complete works of Shakspeare to go haywire. Henry VIII wants to join in but is called back by his mother of the Aldrich family and she spanks him, only stopping then she sees Frank Sinatra whose voice makes all the little women faint and mother goose to go crazy. This goes into a musical number.

Daffy jumps off a Looney Tunes comic book and tells them to shut up. Getting some clothes out of the Saratoga Trunk, he dresses as Danny Kaye and sings his own song. He warns Little Red Riding Hood about the wolf and only just realizes his leg being salted. (In a blink and you’ll miss it scene, Daffy becomes a giant eye. This gag would be reused in “Tiny Toons” as a disease called “Clampettitus.”)

He hides in the petrified forest while the long arm of the law throws the wolf into jail for life. (Magazine) He easily breaks free but ends up falling down skid row, almost right into Dante’s Inferno. He nearly escapes but Sinatra’s singing makes him fall back in. In celebration everyone dances and has a good time… before the wolf tells them to knock it off.

Personal Rating: 4 (Just barely misses the 5 mark. I wouldn’t fault you for thinking it ranks higher.)

Porky In Wackyland

“Ex-tree! Ex-tree! Porky off on dodo hunt!”

This.. is my favorite cartoon ever! Heck, it’s my favorite bit of animation ever. Is it the humor? The sureality? The b/w charm? The fact that I consider it the epitome of cartoons? All that and whatever too! It’s great no matter how you slice, saute and butter it! And that’s why this site shares its name.

Like its successor this cartoon has Porky is off to find the last of the dodo birds. Its worth a lot of money. He arrives at the best place ever put to film: Wackyland! While searching, Porky sees many of the denizens that call this crazy landscape home. Or at least a condo. (Look! Bob Clampett and his animators created Catdog)

Amidst the bizarre, he finds the bird of his dreams. And the chase is on. The bird is tricky, and Porky has to disguise himself to get his hands on him. He succeeds in his capture but the dodo reveals something about himself. He may be the last of his species but that doesn’t mean he’s the only one left… (That’s a victory for Mother Earth, at least.)

Personal Rating: 5 (And I really feel that way too.)

Duck Soup to Nuts

“C-c-c’mon out or i’ll b-b-blow your head off!”

Daffy is minding his own business when a hunting Porky comes to shoot him. (Porky seems to have some kind of bad suntan.) Daffy tries to discourage him by showing off his talents but Porky won’t buy it. After a chase that includes Daffy in the gun and Porky getting bumps on his head, Daffy hides underwater where Porky can’t get him.

After failing to get him with a diving helmet, Porky drains the lake. (He’s determined.) He finds Daffy flopping around but refuses to believe he’s a fish. Daffy retaliates by refusing to believe the hunter is a pig. He’s an eagle. They argue, and Daffy pulls the ole switcheroo, (That gag will never get old) and Porky jumps off a tree to prove his eagle prowess.

Out of bullets in his rifle, Porky pulls out a pistol and prepares to kill Daffy. Daffy begs to say goodbye to his family. Porky feels he can’t shoot a married duck with children and leaves. As soon as he’s gone the other ducks reveal themselves to be friends of Daffy’s. They all laugh…until Porky comes back for revenge.

Personal Rating: 3

The Great Piggy Bank Robbery

“Fantastic! And furthermore, its unbelieva…ble!”

Daffy waits for his mail to the tune of “Powerhouse.” (and he even says “Thufferin Thuccotash” one of two times I can recall) his patience is rewarded with a new Dick Tracy comic book. He eagerly pours over each exciting panel and wishes he could be the man he admires. He accidentally knocks himself out and imagines that scenario.

Duck Twacy (Daffy) is getting numerous phone calls about missing piggy banks. He dismisses it as small stuff until he realizes his was stolen too. He immediately gets to the gangsters hideout (Porky cameo, yay!) and is met by the worst of the worst including: Mouseman, Pumpkinhead, Pussycat Puss, Batman, 88 Teeth, Neon Noodle, Double Header, and Wolfman. the chase is on! (Hey look! There’s an original Tracy villain: Flattop!)

Daffy makes pies out of Pumpkinhead and is tackled by most of the others. His body parts squirm out and he murders them with a Tommy-gun. Neon Noodle tries to get him, but hes turned into an “Eat at Joe’s sign”. Daffy finds the stolen goods and kisses the bank that’s his. He then wakes up to find himself kissing a sow.

Personal Rating: 5

Baby Bottleneck

“I do all the woik, and the fadders get all the credit.”

You didn’t think that I wouldn’t talk about Porky more after the last post did you? Also, I’d say sorry for no update on Tuesday, but next to no one comes here anyway so I’d only be apologizing to myself… On to the cartoon.

After World War 2,  people keep pumping out babies and it’s taking its toll on the stork. He quits and some inexperienced people try to make the deliveries themselves, but they make plenty of mistakes. Such as kittens to mice, gorillas to kangaroos and an alligator to a pig. (There is actually a censor that has never been restored. When the reptile tries to nurse at her teat, the sow originally said “Don’t touch that dial” If you don’t blink, you can see a brief frame of the line about to be said)

Replacing those idiots are Porky and Daffy. Daffy mans the phones and makes wisecracks to Cantor, about his lack of getting a boy and Mr. Dione for asking for a little too much. Porky is in charge of the assembly line which gets the babies ready for delivery. The only problem is one egg has no address. Porky asks Daffy to sit on it (Look how huge his hat got!) but Daffy refuses. A chase ensues which ultimately ends with the two running on the assembly line, getting dressed up like a baby, and shipped to Africa. Mother gorilla is in for quite the shock .

Personal Rating: 4

Kitty Kornered

“I hate p-p-p-p-p-pussy cats.”

About time I talked about the great and hilarious Porky again! Its nine o clock and everyone is putting their cat out. Porky has 4. A kitten, a midget cat, a drunk cat, and Sylvester. (Don’t let the yellow eyes and black nose fool you. It’s him. You can trust me) However, they have no intent on being outside and they toss Porky out in their stead.

They decide to party with cigars, wine, and chocolates when Porky re enters. He chases them, and at one point pulls Sylvester off a moose head and pulling out a full moose. Porky gets rid of them by using a shadow puppet of his dog and they flee. Sylvester comes up with a plan, and they don martian get ups to scare Porky out into the snow. The pig asks the audience if they know of any houses to rent.

Personal Rating: 4

Snow Business

“I’ll sthtarve!”

Sorry for the lack of update last week. I was forced to go camping and it took a lot out of me. In other news, I got a new person to visit here. (Give yourself a hand, ***.) So without further ado…

A blizzard is taking place and Granny can’t get to her cabin where her pets are. (And the man stopping her is no help “Well, I’m sorry ma’am”) In the cabin we see that the two pets are good friends. (Well Sylvester almost tries to eat Tweety, but he controls himself) They hear over a radio, that they are snowed in and worry they will starve. Tweety won’t because the only food available is birdseed. Sylvester thinks of something he can eat but he doesn’t tell Tweety what it is.

Instead he offers him a chance to go sailing (in a boiling pot of water) or skating. (in a pan of grease) This would work out great, but also in the cabin is a mouse who is starving and decides that putty tat is on the menu. Eventually, Granny makes it back to the cabin. To her surprise, the only thing she brought to eat is more bird seed.

Personal Rating: 3

Bird in a Guilty Cage

“We’ll play thandwich.”

Sylvester walks by a department store. To his delight, there is a canary on sale. He sneaks in and heads towards Tweety. (Not before ogling some mannequins in bathing suits.) Tweety hides on a ceiling lamp. Sylvester tries being creative and constructs a tower of mannequins to reach his prize. As he climbs up, Tweety climbs down and attaches roller skates to the tower, sending it down stairs.

Next, Tweety hides in a pile of hats. Sylvester can’t resist trying them on, but finds most of them horrible. Tweety is on one of them and seeing this, the puttytat tries to hammer the bird but only hits his own head. At the end, Tweety jumps in a mail chute and Sylvester goes to where he believes the bird will come out with his mouth open. Tweety comes out another end and sends a TNT stick his way. Sylvester is sure he ate Tweety and he leaves the store. After an explosion, he decides that birds upset his stomach.

Personal Rating: 3