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Speedy Gonzales

The fastest mouse in all of Mexico and a hit with the ladies, is Speedy here. Speedy here, got his start in Mckimson’s “Cat-tails for Two.” There, he looked like a rat. No, really. He wore a red shirt, no pants, scruffy hair, and a gold tooth. But his next cartoon (and the one I will review next time) led him to stardom. Why? Because he won an Oscar. So that elevated him to star.

His most frequent adversary was Sylvester, but during the end of the golden age of Looney Tunes, it was Daffy. I don’t know why. They just had a lot of Daffy and Speedy back then. Daffy probably just wanted more screen time, and they needed a fast character who could come whenever.

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Lumber Jerks

“It seems like they are bent on the destruction of our forest.”

For unknown reasons, the gophers are more like tree squirrels in this short. They are gathering acorns for the winter only to find their tree is gone. A quick search later and it is found among many others in a river. They try to paddle it back to shore but wind up going down a waterfall and ending up at a sawmill. Narrowly avoiding being sliced they notice where they are. Its the sawmill from hell!

They are turning trees into sawdust and then mixing with glue and water to make fake logs, and sharpening whole trunks into toothpicks. Finding their stolen property (now a chest of drawers) they siphon the gas from the delivery truck and catch up to it.  We see that they have built a new tree out of furniture which is much nicer than the old one because they have television. Really enjoying it, they think that they will enjoy it more once they have electricity.

Personal Rating: 3

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The Goofy Gophers

These two have somewhat of a misnomer for a name. They are in no way goofy. They are polite and courteous to each other and would do anything for the other one. That is why these guys are so funny. Their names are Mac and Tosh, and I have no idea who is who. The only difference between the two is one is voiced by Mel Blanc, the other by Stan Freberg.

There are plenty of other mysteries. Like how did they meet? Are they brothers? Perhaps the most important question of all is: why have I only seen these guys twice? As a Looney Tunes scholar I figure I must watch as many as possible. To the internet! Wait…

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Canned Feud

“They forgot to put the cat out.”

Sylvester’s owners are leaving on a vacation for two weeks, but forget to put him out. He tries the doors (which are all locked from the inside) and every cupboard. He is relieved to find cans of sardines, salmon, and tuna. Plus one can of herring. Needing a can opener, he realizes that a mouse has it and will not give it to him. This leads to Sylvester trying to get it. (With him getting hurt every time)

This mouse is such a dick. I don’t think Sylvester ever did anything to him. Plus, if he’s well fed, he won’t try to eat the mouse; the little pus bag. Ultimately, Sylvester shoves tons of explosives into the mouse’s hole and finally gets the tool. But what’s this? There is now a lock on the cupboard. That dickwad of a mouse has the only key. With this, our favorite feline faints. (Try saying that three times fast)

Personal Rating: 3

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Bugs and Thugs

“Jiggers! The cops!”

It’s rabbit season, but Bugs is a city dweller, so he’s in no danger. That all changes when a mysterious car stops at the bank Bugs is at. Mistaking it for a taxi, Bugs hops in and soon finds out its the getaway car of Rocky and Mugsy! (The latter of whom is making his first appearance.) Figuring out they are crooks, Bugs tries to call for help, but fails and now has to stall the crooks. When they get to the hideout, Rocky tells Mugsy to let Bugs have it. In the other room, Bugs asks to be given “it”, with “it” being the gun.

To survive, Bugs imitates the cops, causing the crooks to hide in the oven. Still pretending, (Even though he could now leave. Classic Bugs) he tells himself that if they were in the oven, he would not turn on the gas or throw in a lighted match. After his charade, the real police arrive causing the same dialogue we just heard. The crooks beg to be arrested, and Bugs goes back to the city as a detective.

Personal Rating: 4

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Puddy Tat Twouble

“This is what I get for dweaming of a white Christmas.”

This short starts with Tweety singing his theme song. After the intro, we see it’s winter and Tweety has been spotted by Sylvester and an orange cat. They both grab the bird, but there is not enough for the both of them. They fight and eventually end up in a basement. Tweety sees a toy dunking bird and mistaking it for a real bird, tries to make friends, Orange makes the same mistake and eats the toy.

The two putty tats fight and they end up outside again. They see a hole near a sign that says “thin ice,” with Tweety’s hat beside it. In reality he is picking a circle around the cats and they fall in the water. (“thin ice,” my butt.) We end with the cats both suffering from colds. Probably dreaming of the cream of Tweety they don’t have.

Personal Rating: 3

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Tweety

Is there anything more adorable than a baby bird? How about a bird who is smarter than you average cat and an expert at exterminating them? Tweety got his start in Clampett’s “A Tale of Two Kitties.” He was different than you see him today. He was pink, and more violent than he is now. (He had no problems with killing cats.) They changed his color to yellow since he was pretty much naked. (Yet nobody cared that Porky wore no pants. As they shouldn’t.)

With his new feathers, they teamed him up with Sylvester and Warner Bros. won its first Oscar for animated short. Tweety has been very successful since then, with a lot of merchandise and his own movie. One more bit of trivia TWEETY IS A FREAKING BOY! This really seems to blow peoples minds but it just seems natural to me. (Okay, I admit it.  I too thought he was a girl at one point. I’m terribly ashamed.)

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Super Smash Bros. Looney Tunes

Now then, my favorite video game of all time (at the time of this writing) is Super Smash Bros. Brawl. So what do you get if you combine that with my all time favorite cartoons? You get awesome to the extreme, that’s what! This series is created by a very talented person who goes by “HotCheetoVidoes.” (Or as I like to call her, the  cheetowoman. I think she’s okay with that.) Luckily for me, even though we barely know each other, she was willing to let me feature her work on this site. I would rather not spoil these for you. So,watch and enjoy, then go to her channel and watch more! Dr. Foolio demands you! It’s pure art! Pure genius! A true masterpiece!

Personal Rating: 2 (Well, they aren’t perfect)

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Kit for Cat

“Baby kittens are so cute”

It is a cold night and Sylvester and a little kitten seek shelter in Elmer’s house. He says he would like a cat, but can not decide which one to keep. Deciding to sleep on it, Sylvester decides to use this time to plot on how to screw the little one over. He pours milk over it and breaks the bottle causing Fudd to run down. The plan backfires when Elmer just thinks the kitten is hungry and gives it more food. Sylvester tries to make it look like it broke some dishes, but as Fudd runs downstairs the kitten starts gluing them back together. Sylvester begins breaking them again only for Elmer to see him.

Soon, Elmer says that one more sound and Sylvester will be kicked out. The kitten tries to make as much noise as possible. Elmer says he has made up his mind about who’s leaving, and so has his landlord. In the end Elmer is with the cats in the alley looking through the trash. (Fun fact: the landlords message is a bunch of gibberish followed by the sentence: “In other words: get out!”)

Personal Rating: 3

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Sylvester

When I was younger, this guy was scary. I thought that in every cartoon, he ate the little bird. My fears were wrong and he became one of my favorites.

First appearing in “Life with Feathers” Sylvester did not really have to change his appearance. He is also used quite a lot in cartoons. With Tweety he hunts, with Porky, he is afraid of everything, with his son he tries to be an impressive father, with Hippity Hopper he tries to prove his worth by catching the giant “mouse”, with Elmer he annoys him, with Speedy he guards stuff, with Foghorn he fights, and with Wile E, he teams up. Plus there are the cartoons without any of them. That makes 9 actual lives for Warner Bros clownish cat. (That’s an accurate description. He was designed to look like a clown).