Zoom and Bored

“More free bird seed”

During another one of their never ending chases, the Roadrunner leaves an awful lot of smoke in his wake. So obviously, the coyote does not notice the ground has run out and he falls. He climbs up again, and as soon as he makes it, the bird startles him into falling again. Then as he walks away, it comes up behind, scares him again, and he jumps into a rock.

Following some book instructions, he prepares a hole with a jackhammer. It is very powerful, and he keeps feeling aftershock. He uses this to his advantage and destroys the book this way. After building a brick wall (and experiencing another shake) he is shocked to see another coyote’s rear on the other side. It copies everything he does, so he rolls some TNT at it, only to find out that it’s still him. (Gotta love cartoon logic)

More gags ensure, (including one with angry bees) and he ultimately fires a harpoon gun that also is wound around his leg and he gets launched. After a wild ride, he’s bruised and whimpering near a cliffs edge. The Roadrunner appears, but doesn’t scare him this time. He lets us know that he hasn’t the heart.

Personal Rating: 3

Scrambled Aches

“Dehydrated Boulders”

Sorry for not updating, even though I had plenty of time. Spring cleaning was brutal. Anyways, sit back and enjoy our latest Wile E. Coyote cartoon post.

While chasing the Roadrunner for the umpteenth time, (and falling off a cliff) the coyote uses a fake leg that he aims to trip the bird with. The bird runs by so fast it twists, and when the coyote sets it down, he twists. Continuing on with his clever contraptions that he builds; he makes one with a sail, roller skates, and a fan. He can’t steer it apparently since he goes through a lake and off a cliff.

Now up high, he throws an anvil. The bird stops short and the anvil keeps falling and lands on some telephone wires and back up. (Don’t worry. It does not hurt the coyote, it just severs the cliff he’s on.) He sets up a miniature steamroller and it chases the bird. It takes a detour to avoid the roller, and ends up in a cannon. After it fails to ignite, Wile E. looks inside to see what looks like a train. Figuring its just one of the birds pranks, he keeps looking only to get hit by a cannonball, with the bird on top. As he walks away fuming, the steamroller appears. Before he’s clobbered he lets us know it’s the end.

Personal Rating: 3

There they go-go-go

“?”

Wile E. Coyote is preparing a delicious feast: a turkey made of mud. After it cooks, he finds he can not eat it and proceeds to toss it into a mud trash can. Cue object of desire. Lunging with a spear (crashes into road) and using a pop-out gun (comes out too far, thus shooting him) are both nothing new. Then he makes some really cool mace copter! That lands on him.

He deploys a ladder for use as a bridge, but cuts it partly so it will break. When he sees the Roadrunner above him, he grabs the ladder and prepares to climb, only for it to snap in half. Eventually he sets up a trap where various boulders will be emptied onto the bird, but they are packed in too tightly. He pokes them with a stick before he realizes what he’s doing. CRASH!

Personal Rating: 3

Gee Whiz-z-z

“Egad!!”

While Wile E is chasing his prey, the bird makes a sharp turn just to confuse the canine. (Remember this trick.) The coyote shoots a gun, but the bird actually outruns the bullet. He holds up a steel plate but the bird runs through it. (I think he took the coyote’s body too.) Wile E tries a bat man’s (not Batman) outfit and surprisingly, it works. If he had only looked where he was going…

He makes use of his artistic side and paints a “bridge out” scene. The tunnel gag goes in reverse now, with the bird running through it and the coyote running off it. As a last resort, Wile E rides a jet engine and nearly catches his prize. It pulls the same sharp turn trick though and the coyote falls off a cliff. As he falls he asks that the cartoon end before we see his impact I suppose that’s fair.

Personal Rating: 3

Guided Muscle

“Acme Grease“

Ahh, lunchtime. Today the coyote is stewing up a delicious can. Too bad he can’t bring himself to actually eat it. Especially when there is better game to hunt. Turning himself into an arrow works until he launches himself into a cactus and off a cliff. He sets up a slingshot attached to a red fuzzy cactus (?) but it does not launch until he does not want it to. He tries firing a cannon, but it shoots him back into a cliff wall before shooting himself in the head.

A wrecking ball just makes the tree it’s attached to fall on him, and when he greases the road, the Roadrunner just mocks him by skating. He thinks tarring and feathering would work, but did you know roadrunners are already feathered? Finally, he buries some dynamite but the bird causes him to run over it just as it detonates. Frustrated, he quits his cartoon job, and and pulls out the “That’s all, folks!” card.

Personal Rating: 3

Ready, Set, Zoom!

“Detour thru tunnel”

One morning, the coyote awakes for a fresh day of Roadrunner chasing. Today’s tricks include painting a road with glue. (Look, he’s on it, but then there’s a circle around him. Did it just evaporate?) He gets hit by a truck. He tries again with the glue and a dynamite stick, but the bird just runs through it, splashing the glue on him and the TNT. BOOM!

He successfully gets the bird into a log perched off a cliff, but the bird just jumps out through a knothole. The coyote falls. He tries to drop a weight that does not fall until he’s under it and when he tries a TNT lasso, the bird takes an alternate route, and the coyote blows up. He also makes a creative device complete with wagon and boat motor.  He goes careening off a cliff, and quickly unties himself only for the machine make it to the other side, anyway. He also puts on a female roadrunner suit, and gets chased by every coyote in the desert.

Personal Rating: 3

Stop! Look! and Hasten!

“Coyote (Eatibus Anythingus)”

365 days of this blog! One more until the first anniversary!

Food is scarce in the desert, so the coyote has to make do with flies and old cans. Then his dream lunch runs by and new ideas swarm in his head. A boulder just falls on him and a snare trap gets him a truck. A tiger trap only catches a tiger (obviously) and when he tries a steel wall that will pop out of the ground, the stupid thing gets stuck.

The chase continues onto the railroad where he gets creamed by a train, and when he decides to use a detonator, he blows himself up. (Watch the handle, it changes color.) Getting the bird to stop for some free bird seed, he tries the classic saw around prey, and whole bridge falls gag. (Good thing roadrunners can fly.)

As a last resort, he chugs down some leg vitamins and now he can catch up to the bird, but of course just as he is about to catch it, the wall from earlier pops up. The Roadrunner spells out “That’s all Folks” in his dust.

Personal Rating: 4

My Looney Tunes History

I might as well take a break about the usual stuff I talk about, and mention little ole me. I figure I have the right to do this since my one year anniversary is coming up.

This tale begins when I was around three years old. I was afraid of many things: eyes, commercials, cats, bees, heat vents; I swear I’m not making any of that up. Another thing that really creeped me out were the Looney Tunes. I had no good reason to fear them but I did. (Thinking Sylvester always ate Tweety is not a good reason.) The closest I ever came to seeing them was when I was at a friend of my mom’s house hanging out with her son. (He was a bit of a douchebag.) He wanted to watch “Space Jam” which sent me into hysterics.

Yet, curiosity got the better of me and I watched maybe the first 20 minutes. I can’t really say I enjoyed it, but it made calm down a little bit about the series as a whole. When I was 5, my family moved to a new location. (Mostly because our old house was on a street that I’m sure was a freeway.) At our new place I found new friends, a new school, and cable TV. Watching Cartoon Network, (and again I can’t stress this enough, that channel is garbage now) I realized how wonderful Looney Tunes could be.

With that said though, I still would not be into them for about another four years. Sure, they were entertaining enough to watch, but nothing I’d choose over shows like “Rugrats” “Chip ‘N Dale’s Rescue Rangers” and “The Powerpuff Girls.” Time passed and my parents decided I was too hooked on television. (Hey if CN was still GOOD, then I still would be today.) So they ditched it. Not much of a chance for me to get invested now. So, how did I become the Looney-tic I am today? I’m getting there.

Now at age nine, I was at a book sale at my elementary school. It was there. In the used section; two books. They were histories of Bugs Bunny and Tweety/Sylvester respectively. They were open, so somebody must have been looking at them before me. Probably wouldn’t have paid much attention if the picture on the page wasn’t of “Room and Bird” I’d seen that one before! What kind of book was this, anyway?

I began looking through the pictures myself. I found it quite a joy. And then? I put both books back on the shelf and moved on. Yep. Still not convinced. Or was I? Actually, I couldn’t get them out of my head. The rest of the day and night, I wondered: “Should I buy those?” It took some thinking but ultimately, my decision was this: I’d return the next day, and if the books were still there, I’d adopt them.

The next day came and lo, they were still there. A promise was a promise and I coughed up the coins. (25 cents each is underrated, but soooo worth it.) I took my new purchase home and decided reading them might also be enjoyable. (Kind of odd that it wasn’t my intent the whole time.) Those books changed me. I learned what wonderful, magical, precious entertainment these cartoons possessed. How could I not have gotten sucked in earlier?

Wouldn’t you know it, about a month later, I saw a Looney Tunes DVD set. I didn’t just want that, I needed it. I had to have it. My parents bought it for me for my birthday and, yes, finally I became the person I am now. (The Looney part at least. I love a good number of cartoons. Too many to list here.) My appetite was hardly satiated. More DVD’s would come, I’d request them every time I could and the cartoons continued to wow me. I’ve used them to teach; I’ve learned from them, and they entertained my friends too. (Wow. I used to have friends?)

That’s as far as we’ll go today. I don’t know what will happen next, but I can’t imagine who I’d be today without Bugs, Porky, Daffy and the rest. They’re role models, entertainers, heroes and buddies. Really, they mean this much to me, and more.

Zipping Along

“Yeooooow!”

We all know the Roadrunner is fast, but did you know he can outrun a speeding train? He may just be minding his own business, but there are hungry eyes watching. This time the coyote tries to throw a grenade, but only throws the pin. He tries the old classic: mousetraps, but they just end up on him. He tries to drop a bomb from a kite, but kites were not exactly designed to carry that much weight, now were they?

Since there are no cops around he can get away with chopping a telephone pole. (It falls on him.) He learns hypnotism, but the bird has a mirror and he gets himself to walk off a cliff. He tries making a booby trapped doorway but he gets hit by a car before it can be used for its intended purpose.

Personal Rating: 3

Going! Going! Gosh!

‘Road runner (acceleratti incrediblus)’

After the Roadrunner runs by, the coyote jumps from his hiding place to pounce…and misses. Time to use the old noggin! When launching a TNT arrow, only the bow gets fired. Using a large slingshot ends up with the coyote pinned against… err… some plant, and his cement just ends up covering himself.

He tries a grenade while under a manhole but the bird takes a different route and ends up pinning a rock on the manhole cover. BOOM! He dresses up as a female hitchhiker (the bird already has a date) and paints a fake road (only to have a real truck drive out of it.) After some more gags (including a genius hot air balloon) the coyote decides to jump and harpoon the bird. However he gets hit by another truck. This one driven by the bird himself.

Personal Rating: 3