Category: Cinecolor shorts

These cartoons were shot in a different color process then usual. Didn’t stop them from being hilarious.

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Along Flirtation Walk

“21! 18! 36! 32! Hike!”

Supervision by Isadore Freleng; Animation by Bob McKimson and Paul Smith; Musical Score by Norman Spencer. A Merrie Melody released on April 6, 1935.

Tomorrow is the big game! (Actual Big Game date may vary. Please consult a calendar instead of me to get your facts straight.) Good old Plymouth Rock College. So much better than that preppy Rhode Island Reds University. (Think they’re better than us, do they?) To hype everyone up for tomorrow’s event, a dance is being held. And quite the progressive one for the time period at that. Nowhere else in 1935 will you see a chicken dancing with a duck.

Sure, he’s civil when he meets her on the street.

Outside the dance is the perfect place for young couples to get some privacy. The poor bird on the end only looks like they’re lonely and alone. Actually, they’re just nervous about the game tomorrow as they’re competing. Romance doesn’t play any part in today’s story. (But it ties in so well with the title song.) Next day, game day! Our two teams are raring to go! Look at those fine specimens! The coaches should be really proud of those boys! What’s the event anyhow? Cockfighting? Crowing? Something masculi- why do they look ready to lay eggs?

Wait, those are hens? Good twist! Call me a sexist pig all you want, (I like being compared to swine.) but I wasn’t expecting an all female sports team in the 1930’s! Much less one that gets such a turnout. So that’s settles things then. The event is egg laying. Seems like something best kept private, but I should really learn to be more accepting of other cultures. But one thing that can’t be rebutted is that it looks painful. And people think women don’t want to play painful games.

So our little black hen from earlier is named by me! And I’ll name her Penelope. (Haven’t used that one yet. Not for a bird, anyway.) She wants to be on the field where the action is, buy the coach refuses. (Why is she here then? Answer me that, coach!) Comes back to bite him in the tail feathers by half-time. The opposition are leading by 58 points? Those rotten Reds! (It’s not racism, just schoolism.) And it looks like they have a sneaky way to hold on to the lead. They ingest billiard balls. (They’ll regret it tomorrow when they tear their cloacas apart. What a hemorrhoid.)

It’s working! The crowd can’t tell that eggs that look like billiards are often billiards, themselves. Things aren’t going much better for the Rocks as one of the players had a little too much fun with her boyfriend the previous night, and is now producing chicks. That’s a penalty. And it’s coming at such an inopportune time! There’s only five minutes left and the reds have such an insurmountable lead. Once more, Penelope begs to be part of the game. Seeing as how it’s one of those “nothing to lose, everything to gain” scenarios, Coach puts her in.

What an athlete! Barely on that nest for four minutes, and she’s already raised the total to 99! But the opposition has 100! Just a little more! Two hammers to the noggin equals two more eggs, (Not the Disney series. That sucked.) and thus ends the game! Up yours, Rhodes! All hail our new champion! She doesn’t need a trophy to remember this victory. Her bump will do nicely.

Favorite Part: While we’re looking along flirtation walk, we see a turkey couple ready to make out. Seeing our eager faces, the tom uses his fan as a chastity screen. Then he mocks us. (We deserve it.)

Personal Rating: 2

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The Cat Came Back

“WHAT THE F-!!!!”

Directed by Cordell Barker; Produced by Richard Condie, Cordell Barker; Written by Cordell Barker; Based on: The Cat Came Back by Harry S. Miller; Starring: Richard Condie. A cartoon released on June 22, 1988.

Boy, oh boy! What a treat we have here! A cartoon well worthy of its spot on the 50 greatest cartoons. It’s got catchy music, great jokes, fun animation, and… isn’t… even a Warner Bros. cartoon. Oops. Let me try it again.

“And she kicked me right here! Right where I sit down!”

Supervision by Isadore Freleng; Animation by Robert McKimson and Ben Clopton. A Merrie Melody released on February 8, 1936. (The last cartoon to be produced in Cinecolor.)

There we go. That’s what we’re used to. And look at the… um, cuties? Look, you should really be aware of my feelings toward cats by now. The only way I could find them cute is roasted to a golden brown, with some of those paper things at the end of its legs, and a garnish on top. But I’ll digress for now. The kittens are having a wonderful time while mother cat watches. And just across the way from the basement they live in is a family of mice.

Things are a little less joyous in the mouse house. Mother mouse is busy lecturing her pups about the evil kats. (sic.) Mere hyperbole and mouse propaganda, right? Hardly! For at this very moment, Mrs. Meow is teaching her kittens how to attack and probably kill mice. Which ordinarily wouldn’t seem too strange, but all the animals are on a similar scale of size. Instead of predator and prey, it just looks like a gang war.

At least Mrs. Squeak doesn’t stop at just talking, she also has the brains to train her children on dodging paws. (She has whiskers now?) But one little mouse can’t help but take a peek outside the hole and see what the world is really like. A kitten cross the way has similar aspirations. At last, the two star-crossed lovers can finally meet! I kid. Actually, they look ready for a rumble. Guess their mothers really did get through to them.

It’s then that Mrs. Squeak catches sight of what’s going on. She tells the kitten to leave her kid alone, and we learn that she was set to become the fourth Chippette before  she became a mother. (Oh? Would you like to explain her sudden change of voice then?) The little cat tries to follow because… it either wants to eat them, or it has learned that the mouse isn’t so different from its kind after all? Its reason doesn’t matter, because the mouse matriarch throws the cat right back out.

The little cat tells its mother what happened, and she goes to give the neighbor a piece of her mind. Squeak ain’t having any of it, and gives her eyes a good poking. She’s won this round, so Mrs. Meow has no choice but to drag her offspring home. Later, as the kitten mopes around, the mouse invites it to come have some fun together. (I guess it got over its hatred too.) The two do some dancing, before the cat falls into an open sewer. (What a typical cat.)

Meow heard those screams (That didn’t occur during the actual falling part.) and runs right over. We skip the tired cliche of her thinking the mouse was behind it all, as the mouse decides to jump in after its new pal. Also becoming alert is Squeak who makes an actual effort to rescue her kid. It doesn’t work, but I give points for effort. The mouse isn’t able to catch up to the cat because of the strong current. (Why is there a cuckoo clock, guitar and chair down here? These animals are just as bad as humans.)

The cat comes to a whirlpool, and is close to death. Time for the mouse to save the day! While holding on to a plank of wood up above, it lowers its tail to be grabbed on. (So, maybe its not a food related animosity. Maybe the cats just hate being constantly shown up.) The whirlpool is strong and twists the mouse like taffy, turning it into a makeshift helicopter. The two fly out. They are safe!

They return home and the two families decide to bury the hatchet and be friends. But wouldn’t you know it, Mrs. Meow just can’t get over that eye poke from earlier and she starts pounding Mrs. Squeak. (Cats also can’t forgive.) Being impressionable youths, the children forego their friendly ways and go back to how things were before.

Favorite Part: Mrs. Squeak training her kids to dart through active mousetraps. The cherry on top is her smile. “Yes, Billy. I want you to enter this contraption that can snap your neck. It’s for your own good.” You can’t prove there’s no risk.

Personal Rating: 2 If you only want to watch the first cartoon up there, I understand.

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Those Beautiful Dames

“One, two, three, go!”

https://youtu.be/YnE3JolIFek

Supervision by Isadore Freleng; Animation by Paul Smith and Charles Jones; Musical Score by Bernard Brown. A Merrie Melody released on November 10, 1934.

On a cold, miserable night, (Yes, I know that’s a redundant statement.) a poor, little orphan girl walks through the snow. You can tell she’s an orphan, for she has all the typical orphan traits: a tattered shawl over her shoulders, a glum expression, and only one of her pant legs remains attached. (Okay, it could just be a low stocking. How would I know anything about women’s clothes? I’m a twenty-six year old virgin!)

Jessica, (for that is the name I’ve chosen to give her) would really like to play with some toys in the toy shoppe she peeks into. But even thought the light in the shoppe suggests they are open, she trudges along. (Maybe they operate by the strict “You play with it, you buy it” rule.) I really do feel sorry for the little one. She’s pretty cute. If I could adopt her, I would. (I’d regret it soon afterwards as I’m not fond of kids. But I’d find her the nicest orphanage to dump her off at.)

She makes it back to either her home, or just where she is going to be spending the night. If it isn’t already her home, then she could definitely do better. The only food available is mice skeletons, and the fire is thinner still. Shelter is shelter, though. She drifts off to an uneasy sleep. And then… uh-oh. I think the hypothermia is making her hallucinate. Toys don’t just follow you home from the shoppe. This cartoon sure got dark.

Since Jessica is still “asleep”, the toys use this opportunity to pretty the place up a bit. A little paint, a little wallpaper, and by the stroke of midnight, you’ll have comfortable furniture, electric lights, and a fireplace. Time to wake the waif. They even gave her a crown! Isn’t that…heavenly? The toys aren’t just interior decorators, though. They’re the entertainment. By which I mean, they’ve got a floor show planned. (The black toys only get to supply music and food. If this short wasn’t from the 30’s you might think that I just made a racist joke.)

A couple of concertina clowns do a dance, (must have missed that toy growing up. I’m not complaining though Legos and Gumby rock!) and a steam shovel can’t resist getting first dibs on the cake. But that’s okay, as there’s a whole banquet of desserts for human and toy alike. Too bad the hosts booby-trapped Jessica’s with a jack-in-the-box. (Considering they gave her a crown that constantly disappears throughout the picture, I really should have seen that coming.)

Favorite Part: The steam shovel. They could have just had another toy operating it to steal cake, but they decided to let the truck help itself. Much more imaginative.

Personal Rating: 2. It’s a generic cute plot. Doesn’t offer much to more sophisticated minds.

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Riff Raffy Daffy

“What a sthet-up.”

Directed by Arthur Davis; Animation by Don Williams, Emery Hawkins, Basil Davidovich, and J.C. Melendez; Story by William Scott and Lloyd Turner; Layouts by Don Smith; Backgrounds by Philip DeGuard; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Carl W. Stalling. A Looney Tune released on November 7, 1948. (In Cinecolor)

That’s right, Cinecolor! The precursor to the much more celebrated Technicolor. They might look similar, but the former can have a bit of problems having certain colors appear in their full glory. (Green and purple, for example) So, why the switch? A Technicolor strike led to some of the cartoons at this time having no choice but to go the other option. It didn’t last too long, and things would return to normal. (As normal as cartoons get, that is.)

Officer Porky is quite the responsible cop. It may be the middle of the night, but he happily patrols whistling as he does. He has to act tough though, as he finds a sleeping Daffy on a bench. The law says that he is not supposed to be sleeping in any of the locations within the park, and he is thrown out onto the streets. Cue the snow! There’s just gotta be a place where Daffy can rest, and his answer comes to him in the nearby Lacy’s department store. He makes himself comfortable in a display window, and it looks like his problems are over.

Cue Porky! This is even more illegal then the park loitering and the two have a shouting match. Half of which is kept muted, (as we are hearing things as they are, from opposite sides of glass) The other is comprised of indistinct shouting. Looks like Porky is going to have to remove the duck himself. Seeing as he is a policeman, he gets in, no problem, thanks to his skeleton key. Daffy invites him to sit down, offers him a smoke, and even a drink. (Which he uses as an excuse to spray soda all over his face.)

Seeing as they are in a department store, and those tend to sell sporting goods, Porky grabs a bow and arrow. Daffy glues his hand to it, so when Porky fires, he sends himself into a grandfather clock. (The cuckoo inside sends him back out) Daffy isn’t above letting his greed out either, (why do his eyes get rings? It’s scary! Save me, Porky!) as he is willing to sell Porky a gun that would be perfect for shooting ducks. (“The thingsth sthome ducksth will do for money.”) He manages to avoid the bullets, but it looks like Porky found the cannon the cashiers stored behind the counter, (only available by personal request, and you’d better have the I.D. to back it up.) and it looks like Daffy can’t escape anymore.

He admits defeat, but points out that the only reason he did any of this, was to provide for Aphonse and Rodrigo, his…children? AWWWWW! Daffy is the father of the cutest wind-up ducklings! Porky, too, instantly regrets his actions. He allows Daffy and the kids to stay as long as they want, and Daffy finally gets the relaxation he wanted. You might think he’s being too soft on the duck, but Porky knows too well how hard it is being a father. He has three wind-up piglets of his own. (That’s my pal! He’s a champion advocate for single fathers everywhere!)

Favorite part: The ending for sure. But since I already mentioned it, I’ll pretend it’s the part where Porky finds a sobbing gopher sitting amongst his furniture. He immediately knows who evicted the rodent.

Personal Rating: 3

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The Up-standing Sitter

“I’ll face the world alone!”

Directed by Robert McKimson; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by Phil DeLara, Manny Gould, John Carey, and Charles McKimson; Layouts by Cornett Wood; Backgrounds by Richard H. Thomas; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Carl Stalling. Released in 1947
That’s, ah say, that’s no sitter.

Directed by Robert McKimson; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by Phil DeLara, Manny Gould, John Carey, and Charles McKimson; Layouts by Cornett Wood; Backgrounds by Richard H. Thomas; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Carl Stalling. Released in 1947.

Daffy works for a babysitting service. (Are those still around?) Not only that, but apparently he’s the best sitter the place has. He has just gotten a job and heads off. As he goes, he sings about how this job is full of abuse but he puts up with it as the pay is pretty good. He arrives at his location. The mother is a hen and she wants Daffy to keep watch over her unborn child. (With birds, the term babysitter is literal.) He sits and the chick almost immediately hatches. That’s gotta hurt. Not having your mom around to witness your birth. (You and Dr. Doofenshmirtz are kindred spirits kid.)

He tries to guess Daffy’s relation to him, but runs out of relatives and deduces that Daffy is a stranger. Since kids shouldn’t talk to those, he runs off. Sitter or not, Daffy is technically still a stranger. (He’s plenty strange.) I don’t know what this kid’s problem is, but he now goes out of his way to make Daffy suffer. He hides in the mouth of a bulldog named Spike. (Bulldogs are always named Spike. It’s an unspoken rule.) He leaps out as Daffy reaches into the beast and it wakes up. He won’t let go of Daffy’s arm/wing, until he’s backed him up a ladder and off the barn’s roof. The chick (who needs a name. How about Spencer?) finds another hen and goes under. Daffy reaches once more only for the hen to spot him. Trying to play it cool, Daffy pretends he was miming a train the whole time. (Don’t you hate being in those situations?)

Spencer hops out before Daffy spots him and comes back for more hen groping in a barrel disguise. She puts a TNT stick under a feather duster for him to find. Spencer meanwhile has now run onto a wire high above the farm. Daffy tries to tightrope walk over but the chick blows him away. (Rooster’s are known to have really strong lungs, regardless of age.) A slingshot launches him into the side of the barn, and a rocket ends up taking him on a ride that ends up crashing into Spikes house. After it explodes, the dog spanks Daffy with what’s left of his domicile. Spencer gives Daffy a phone, and he calls his employers. A sitter he may be, but he’ll be standing from now on.

Personal Rating: 3

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Dough Ray Me-ow

“Louie is my friend. Yes sir, my best little pal.”

Directed by Arthur Davis. Released in 1948

One of Warner Bros. best one shots! This short stars two pets. The parrot, Louie and the cat, Heathcliff. (Who predates the comic strip Heathcliff by about 25 years. Speaking of, have you ever read it? It’s the most surreal bizarre comic I’ve ever seen. I can’t even tell half the time if there is a joke being told.) Back to the REAL star…

Heathcliff is dumb. He’s so dumb that he actually forgets to breathe! That… is flucking hilarious. No, that’s not a typo. I’m not swearing. Louie helps him out though, despite the fact he is clearly annoyed. (That’s so sweet.) Heathcliff (who actually got make a cameo in “Looney Tunes back in Action“) finds a piece of paper that he wants Louie to read. Turns out, it’s their owner’s will, and when they go, Heathcliff will inherit everything. Once he’s gone, Louie gets the dough. (Makes sense. Parrots tend to live longer than cats.) Louie tells him that instead of reading, he should go on a vacation. The cat returns half a second later due to being homesick. Looks like he’ll have to be permanently removed.

Louie bribes a bulldog to come kill the cat when Louie calls for help. Heathcliff is as strong as he is stupid and saves his chum while holding the dog in one paw. While the cat cracks nuts, (with the nut in his mouth and his head in a giant nutcracker) Louie tries playing a game of “William Tell.” (Which he unhappily seems to be a master at.) He rips a wire out of the wall and invites the cat to play “Radio.” You’ve never played? It’s a wonderful game! All you do is stick two live wires in your ears. Music will then play. (Warning! This only applies to mammals. If you are a bird, then the basic rules of electricity WILL apply to you.) Even putting a can on the cat’s head and having walk into an upcoming train doesn’t kill him. He should have just let Heathcliff do himself in. Besides his breathing problem, he seemed pretty close to crushing his head when he was playing with his nuts. (Don’t try to find an innuendo there by the way; there is none.)

Louie then surprises Heathcliff with a birthday cake. With 3 real candles, and a stick of dynamite. (It’s the thought that counts.) Heathcliff is apparently smart enough to know about numbers as he claims that he is only 3 and hands the explosive back saying it’s unneeded. (So depending on how old Louie is, he probably couldn’t wait another 10-11 years.) Despite Louie claiming he IS four, Heathcliff refuses to accept it and takes the cake and runs. (Why didn’t Louie make all the candles explosive? Your face, that’s why.) After a chase scene, Heathcliff finds his birth certificate that literally says he’s four. He takes the candle back, and wouldn’t you know it, Louie’s scheme works. Heathcliff bids him farewell, as his nine lives fly up to cat heaven.

But Louie just can’t keep his big beak shut, and tells him about the money he can’t take with him. Life number 9 calls the other back, and they all fly back into the body. If Heathcliff can’t take the money with him, then he’s not going. (I didn’t know death was that easy to get out of. I guess every time we sleep, we technically die. We just choose not to permanently die yet. Death is considerate like that.)

Personal Rating: 4

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Dough for the Do-Do

“Hello, Bobo.”

What can I say? This cartoon is pure genius. Sadly, it is pretty much a color remake of “Porky in Wackyland.” It does, however, have new gags, but they are pretty much just ones reused from “Tin Pan Alley Cats”. (The sequel to Wackyland) But now we got the complaints out of the way the good stuff is to come.

Porky is setting out to find the last of the dodo birds which is worth 6,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000! (what he’ll do after that is any ones guess.) Surprisingly, he finds it in Wackyland, located in darkest Africa. (The dodo was found on the island of Mauritius) He comes to a wonderful, crazy, insane, and goofy place that I’m pretty sure is heaven. Color, music, and gags aplenty; this would be in my top 10 Looney tunes. (If I had one)

Personal Rating: 3