Category: Speedy Gonzales

The fastest mouse in Mexico. (Maybe the world) Are you a lady? Then you’re probably already on a first name basis with him.

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Moby Duck

“I wonder how prehisthtoric man usthed to open cansth.”

Directed by Robert McKimson; Animation by Don Williams, Manny Perez, Warren Batchelder, Bob Matz, LaVerne Harding, and Norm McCabe; Layouts by Dick Ung; Backgrounds by Tom O’Loughlin; Film Editors: Lee Gunther and Treg Brown; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Bill Lava. A Looney Tune released on March 27, 1965.

No explanation needed! Daffy and Speedy are marooned on a deserted island, and Daffy ain’t pleased. He’s also being extremely racist, citing one of the reasons that Speedy isn’t a good shipwreck buddy is because he can’t speak proper English. As well as not being a decent food source. Daffy needs food and the good lord provides. A box of canned goods washes up nearby. (Wouldn’t that sink? In real life, I mean.)

Speedy is glad that the two of them won’t starve, but Daffy intends for him to. See, Daffy is a very greedy duck and he intends to hoard all the stuff for himself. Speedy trying to use the logic of “I’m a smaller creature and need less” doesn’t even sway the duck’s sympathies. He probably is very well aware of Speedy’s crazy metabolism, too. (Lightning fast AND a mouse? That box would be empty by Thursday.)

Of course, the biggest problem with canned food is that it is canned. Can openers are required to partake of the goodies within. As is wont to happen in  Looney Tunes, a mouse is the one holding the tool. But unlike the more sadistic mice of the past, Speedy is willing to negotiate. Daffy shares food, Speedy shares the tool. Daffy says nuts to that, and sets about trying to get the cans open via rocks, and axes. (This doesn’t work because cans are the strongest containers in the Tune-iverse.)

I really do have to give credit for Daffy’s next attempt: baiting a sailfish into stabbing the can open. (I never would’ve thought of that.) It’s creative, but also kind of foolhardy. Daffy thinks the best way to go about this is to tie the can to his rear. Dangerous enough, but things get worse when the can comes undone. The sailfish is an unstoppable force by this point, and chases Daffy across the island and up a tree. Daffy still gets the point by the end of it. (You like that one? I got it from “The Jungle Cruise.”)

Speedy decides he’s just going to give Daffy the tool. Probably because he knows what a fat load of good it will do for them now: Daffy left the box in the tidal zone, and it’s now surrounded by water and sharks. Daffy breaks down (his feet and bill even paling to show his anguish) while Speedy makes a new friend: Robinson Crusoe. He’s a great guy to have around, because he knows all the best eateries on the island. Thank goodness it’s “Fridays”, because Daffy won’t be following them in there once he gets a look at the menu. He instead takes like himself to water, and swims for the horizon. (Speedy might follow his lead once he sees what is served up when all the ducks leave the island.)

Favorite Part: Daffy gave me a new way to spell ‘nothing’. N-U-E-T-H-Y-O-N. (Usually that joke would just have the speller spell ‘nuthing’.)

Personal Rating: 2

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Well Worn Daffy

“I would walk a mile to punch a camel in the nose.”

Directed by Robert McKimson; Story by David Detiege; Animation by Warren Batchelder, Bob Matz, LaVerne Harding, Norm McCabe, Don Williams, and Manny Perez; Layouts by Dick Ung; Backgrounds by Tom O’Loughlin; Film Editor: Lee Gunther; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Bill Lava. A Looney Tune released on May 22, 1965.

It’s a one of those hot days that deserts are known for. You can tell by how wildly the sun is pulsating. Speedy is in the midst of dying of thirst with a couple of pals, Pedro and Jose. Just as they are about ready to give up all hope, they spot a well with an oasis around it. Plenty of water there, but it’s off limits as the ones claiming it are Daffy and his camel. They don’t show any proof that they own the place, but they have a gun with them. That’s pretty realistic.

This situation is rather tortuous. Not helping it any is Daffy purposely wasting the water in front of the dehydrated mice. (And even if he was willing to share, that would mean trying to get a drop away from that camel. You seen the intake on those things?) Speedy comes up with a clever plan: he gets Daffy to chase him while the other two make a dash for the H2O. It works decently, but they didn ‘t count on the guard camel actually being in the well. Speedy decides to just try again, not giving any indication that the camel has even left the well by this point.

Well, guess the camel is gone or drowned by this point as Speedy gets a dipper full of the life juice. Daffy manages to succeed in stopping him though, by shooting the container. That is pretty dang impressive seeing as it’s Daffy. And no, the camel is still alive. Speedy learns this when the dromedary succeeds to keep the water from leaving with a trip wire. (I don’t like his laugh. It’s kinda unnerving. And yet, it kinda sounds like what I think a camel would sound like if it could laugh. Which makes it all the more disturbing.)

Okay, so carrying any water away doesn’t seem to have any chance of success. Speedy tries siphoning. He gets Daffy from the hose, who lets them have more gunshots. (Speedy looks so unnatural running away slow and lumbery. Is the lack of water finally taking its toll?) Daffy loads up with all the water he and Camel Joe can hold, and to make sure the mice die, he leaves explosives around the well. Speedy ties them to Joe’s tail and the two run for their lives, losing their water reserves in the process.

Finally allowed to drink, the mice grow swollen on the precious resource. A desperate duck and camel soon come calling, begging for the rodents to spare a drink. (The camel is clearly faking to spare Daffy’s feelings. His hump isn’t even sagging.) Proving that being the “bigger man” is always figurative, Speedy sprays him with the hose.

Favorite Part: Joe saying that Daffy gives him a headache. He doesn’t enjoy hanging around the mallard, but why give up all the free water that comes with the job?

Personal Rating: 2

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Assault and Peppered

“You’ve got to use brains when you fight a war.”

Directed by Robert McKimson; Story by John Dunn; Animation by Manny Perez, Warren Batchelder, Bob Matz, LaVerne Harding, Norm McCabe, and Don Williams; Layouts by Dick Ung; Backgrounds by Tom O’Loughlin; Film Editor: Lee Gunther; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Bill Lava. A Merrie Melody released on April 24, 1965.

Daffy is the owner El Rancho Rio Daffy. Watch in awe as I use the half-year of Spanish I took in middle school to deduce that stands for… The Daffy River Ranch. (Don’t correct me if wrong.) He must have a lot of food on that property, but with only him, it’s not being enjoyed to the fullest. That’s what the starving mice on the border are thinking, anyway. Daffy is angry to see them, because starving on his property lowers the value. He even goes so far as to whip the little guys. (A little too cruel for my tastes.)

They threaten to call Speedy, but Daffy dismisses the hero as a myth. One “yee-ha” later he is angrily challenging the mouse to a duel. A duel of the highest caliber, with forts and cannons. Speedy agrees and we cut to months later with the forts now finished being built. (What? You think Daffy just had those ready made to challenge anybody he dislikes? Clearly, you don’t know Daffy like I do. He’s nothing but pleasantries and lemonade when he’s got everything he wants.)

Daffy fires his cannon and Speedy hurriedly moves everything in its path out of its way. With a clear path, the thing continues along its way until it returns to Daffy’s face. (Speedy makes a lot of noise without actually moving his mouth in this picture. Darn those mid-sixties budgets!) Daffy also plants a mine field, keeping careful track of where each one is buried. Speedy takes the cheat sheet, leaving the duck stranded (Even though it’s way too obvious where they are! Did you not make every mound of dirt on screen?)

Speedy is happy to help him navigate back, listing each mine as Daffy steps on it. (“What do you mean you don’t know where they are? You haven’t missed one yet!” Love that line.) Wait, listen to the sound effect of Daffy falling over. That’s the sound of a fast character arriving on the scene with a short stop! DARN THOSE MID-SIXTIES BUDGETS!) Speedy decides he’s tired and hungry, so he surrenders so he can eat. Daffy can’t believe his good fortune, and pokes the fourth wall by mentioning how he usually gets the losing end of these type of skirmishes.

Daffy decides to celebrate with a 21-gun salute, er cannon salute. When he pulls on the lines, the cannons all turn to him and fire, Speedy gleefully counting each one off.

Favorite Part: Learning Daffy’s full name this time: Don Daffy De La Scrooge Del Meanie Toturro De La Quack… Junior. (Pray you never meet Don Daffy De La Scrooge Del Meanie Toturro De La Quack… Senior.)

Personal Rating: 2

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Cats and Bruises

“Here comes Mr. Butt-inski.”

Directed by Friz Freleng; Co-Director: Hawley Pratt; Story by John Dunn; Animation by Bob Matz, Norm McCabe, Don Williams, Manny Perez, Warren Batchelder, and Lee Halpern; Layouts by Dick Ung: Backgrounds by Tom O’Loughlin; Film Editor: Lee Gunther; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Bill Lava. A Merrie Melody released on January 30, 1965.

On every Cinco de Mayo you can find all the mice in Mexico celebrating. That’s all well and good, but it also means they’re all in one location and Sylvester knows that spot. He tries to infiltrate the party with his own mouse ears (It’s worked before.) but Speedy can see through the disguise and tells everyone to run while he takes care of the party crasher. Speedy even uses an old sign to taunt him. (They still have that? Move on, guys.)

Speedy gets Sylvester into the nearby dog pound a couple of times. (Must be why they chose this venue.) But the budget doesn’t allow any scratches on the cat. He does manage to get Speedy in a net, and dragged around. He’s smart enough to grab a hammer, but slams into a pole. Later, Speedy takes a romantic boat ride with a mouse doe, whilst Sylvester tries to sneak up via rubber raft. Speedy pops that with a dart.

Like the new saying I just made up goes: if you can’t bead’em, outspeed’em. Sylvester is putting his engineering degree to good use as he designs a car that will actually outpace Speedy. We said it was crazy and couldn’t be done, but only the first part of that statement came true. As amazingly enough, the car is doing a dang fine job of catching up to the guy. (If we could see the speedometer, we could use basic math to figure out Speedy’s top speed. I’ve never wanted to do basic math more in my life!)

As it turns out, Speedy is the fastest mouse in all Mexico, and that includes his stopping speed. Meanwhile, it seems Sylvester never foresaw the mouse calling it quits, and didn’t bother to install brakes. He drives off a cliff and into a lake. (Although the camera pans upward. So we should all be forgiven for thinking it launched him into the thermosphere.) Speedy lets everyone know that it is safe to continue partying, and they dance again in the same shot we saw them in originally. (Wait… Speedy really kept them waiting while he went on a date? What a cheesehole!)

But Sylvester isn’t dead if that’s what Speedy was implying; he’s just in a wheelchair. So he can still chase the mouse in a way. Speedy humors him by running a fraction of a fraction of his normal pace. What a cheesehole.

Favorite Part: After Slyvester gets out of the dog pound. Speedy asks if he’s nervous. I like Speedy’s smug face, and the quick “yup” Sylvester responds with.

Personal Rating: 2. And that’s me being nice. This whole picture was a mishmash of reused gags we’ve seen before! (Probably why the animation looks a bit more polished than what was coming out at this time.) However, casual fans and newbies could probably find enjoyment here. (Still, I wouldn’t use this to introduce the characters to them.)

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The Spy Swatter

“There’th my vphictim!”

Produced by William Hendricks and Herbert Klynn; Directed by Rudy Larriva; Story by Tom Degenais, and Carl Howard; Animation by Ed Friedman, Virgil Ross, and Bob Bransford; Film Editor: Joe Siracusa; Musical Direction by William Lava. A Looney Tune released on June 24, 1967.

Speedy is about to make great leaps for mouse-kind. Some mouse professor, (that I’m calling Professor Plutonium because that’s about how creative I’m feeling today.) has created some kind of steroid cheese that can make a mouse stronger than ten cats. (Okay, he calls it super cheese and seeing as how Speedy’s muscles don’t swell any, it’s probably steroid-free. But tell me your mind didn’t immediately jump to that conclusion! You can’t!)

The cheese is as good as Plutonium’s word, and Speedy is able to defeat the robo-cat Professor P. throws at him. (Feels a bit out of character for Speedy to be scared enough to hesitate. I’ve seen you take on robots before this!) Since the cheese is a success, the professor sends Speedy on a mission. Should he choose to accept it, he must deliver the formula for making the cheese to the mice’s cheese factory. (Wait, how did they get one of those?)

Somehow this has all been viewed by our “bad guys” of the picture. (Because trying to make your race and your race alone be unbeatable against those who mean to cause you serious harm automatically makes you the good guy.) Secret agent Daffy and his superior… SAM? Now that’s a cameo I really didn’t expec- oh. This is Mr. Brain, is it? I guess the brown fur should have tipped me off, but I’m still believing him to be Sam’s brother. (Still waiting for an answer to my factory question, too.)

Daffy takes off via jet pack and remembers why it’s a bad idea to do that indoors. He spots his target, but his jet pack decides to run out of fuel at this second. Daffy detaches himself from it, (for no other reason than setting up a punchline.) and gives the finger to Galileo’s theory of objects falling to Earth at the same speed. He lands in the sewer, with his pack landing on his head. The element of surprise is dead and gone now. Speedy is well aware he is being followed. Daffy isn’t upset. He has a device that can show him wherever Speedy goes. (Hello, Logic? Please tell me how that works. Your pal, Dr. Foolio.)

Daffy has a cute little spy car with which to keep pace with the rapid rodent, but Speedy is small enough to duck between two cars that are very close to each other. Pulling a Benny the Cab, (21 years early, yes I’m aware.) Daffy has his car rise above the traffic. So pleased that it worked, he takes his eyes off the road just long enough to crash into a cement mixer’s mixer. (Would “drum” be the right word?) He now has half a car, but it’s luckily the half that has a machine gun. He fires at Speedy who hides behind a telephone pole. The pole falls on Daffy, and the wires shock him. (Oh, Logic! You’re here again! Can you answer my question? Oh, Speedy was chipped, huh? I’ll accept that explanation. Please visit again soon!)

Speedy is closing in on the factory, so Daffy uses his jet pack once more to beat him there. He loses it on a street light and is launched to his target. He decides to use his glove gun. (Because “hand gun” wouldn’t be taken seriously.) But Speedy lives up to his name, and dodges the bullets. He tells Daffy to think of something else. A good idea. Sticking a loaded glove gun to your temple to think, isn’t.

Daffy starts building something, and Speedy just lets him do it. (Hey, this might be a good opportunity to finish your delivery. Just a thought?) Daffy finishes his mouse-seeking missile. While he waits for it to blast off Speedy switches the title to duck-seeking. (By just tapping the letters. Oh, Logic. Why did you leave so soon? I still need you!) Daffy runs back to his H.Q. with the missile in tow. Mr. Brain figures that the duck’s mission was a success. After the explosion, Speedy reminds the two that as the “good guy” he was guaranteed victory from the start.

Favorite Part: While the hesitating was out of character for our protagonist, I did like Professor P. screaming at him to eat the cheese. Sometimes I’m easily amused.

Personal Rating: 2. It’s definitely one of the better Daffy/Speedy team ups. Decent gags and a fun idea. And really, if you asked me to choose a Looney Tune to be a secret agent, Speedy would be one of my top choices.

And with that, I must continue to prepare for ComicCon 2022. If you see anyone dressed up as Michigan J. Frog, make sure it really is me. (Please? At least give me the illusion I have a fan/s.)

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A Taste of Catnip

“Hello? Oh, Señor Duck! Como sta?”

Directed by Robert McKimson; Story by Michael O’Connor; Animation by Ted Bonnicksen, Bob Matz, Manny Perez, Norm McCabe, George Grandpre, and Warren Batchelder; Layouts by Dick Ung; Backgrounds by Tom O’Loughlin; Film Editor: Lee Gunther; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc and Gonzales Gonzales; Musical Direction by Walter Greene. A Merrie Melody released on December 3, 1966.

At Guadalajara Medical centre, you won’t find a better shrink than that of Dr. Manuel Jose Olvera Sebastian Rudolfo Ortiz Pancho Jiminez Perez III. (His friends call him Rudy.) He really is the top of his game, but he can’t help but point out how strange some of his clientele are behind their backs. Such as the time he helped out a fellow by the name of Daffy Duck.

It was about a year ago that Daffy entered the office with quite the peculiar neurosis. It all began when he was at the park. He saw Speedy walk by and he felt a powerful urge that he had never felt before. He wanted to eat Speedy. But that’s absurd, cartoon ducks don’t eat mice! And yet, every time Speedy crosses his path, Daffy has to avoid seeing him to keep his hunger pangs out of control. But things get worse as he finds himself desperately needing to do something else he’s never even conceived of thinking up. He rushes to the nearest trash receptacle, pokes his head in, and lets out a “meow”.

The symptoms worsen. He begins to stalk Speedy on all fours. His competion is not appreciated by Sylvester the cameo. (Marking this short as the cat’s final appearance during the golden era.) So why not just stay home, away from the source of the obsession? Well, Speedy has moved into Daffy’s house and tries to be neighborly, inviting the duck to dinner and everything.

And it’s not like the life of a cat is all overrated videos and lasagna. Daffy now has an instinctual fear of (color changing) dogs, and a need to lap milk from a saucer. That he kept in an unrefrigerated hiding place on top of a hanging lamp. From a color-changing carton. As if drinking milk wasn’t gross enough! (And yes, I’m aware that real cats aren’t supposed to be drinking the stuff either. No need to think you can try and teach me something.)

So, Daffy has come to Rudy for advice. First up, the Rorschach test. Daffy refuses to admit he sees a mouse, even though the doctor sees the same thing. Thus, he deduces that the problem isn’t mental, but physical. Which probably isn’t part of his profession, but what the hey. He enjoys looking with his microscope. He must have taken a blood sample at some point because he has some shocking news: Daffy’s blood catnip is 3.2%!

Wait…. his what?

Yeah, it seems that Daffy’s got catnip on the brain, spine, and circulatory system. Rudy tells him to find the source, and upon returning home, Daffy notices something that he hadn’t before, but probably should have. (So self-centered!) There’s a catnip factory right across the street from his place, and the fumes have been doing things to him. Well, it must be stopped. Peaceful protests, letters to the C.E.O., and poisoning the workforce all take time. Daffy jumps straight to the ultimate solution: bombing.

Well, that problem is fixed, but Daffy is now on the hit list of every cat in the country. All three of them. (One of whom is Sylvester. I wish the other two were Claude and Conrad. What joy I would have!) Still, his feline urges have been suppressed, so I’d call it a happy ending. Rudy meanwhile, is on to his next patient. Speedy himself! And if the quacking is any indication, then I think Speedy thinks he’s a duck! Looks like a certain tape factory won’t be around too much longer.

Favorite Part: Daffy bombing the factory. Such an over-the-top solution for a minuscule problem. Exactly what how I’d expect Daffy to handle it.

Personal Rating: 3 Amazing quality considering when it was released. An interesting plot with nice jokes. (If not hilarious ones.)

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Space Jam A New Legacy (First Thoughts)

“You remember fun, don’t you, doc?”

As the title suggests, these are just my first thoughts about this film. A synopsis, complete with annoying jokes, limited information, and inflations to my own ego will happen someday in the future. Not today, for it is the present.

Very short version of this post: 🙂

Long version of this post: I expected this movie to be fun. Not good, bad, great, or abysmal. Just fun. And I got exactly that. Let’s be real. Even the first S.J. wasn’t really all that great. (Something I’ve come to grips with long since I blogged about it.) Neither of them have a great story, these films are just an excuse to have cartoons play basketball. (And sell W.B. merchandise on the side.)

Speaking of weak story, I won’t lie: this film has got one of those. LeBron is just playing the “father who wants his progeny to be like him, despite the kid’s protests to do something else.” Seen it. And yeah, the man isn’t a superb actor. (At least he is able to admit it in the film.) Still, I feel he does better than Jordan did. He definitely emotes more. As opposed to Michael looking dead inside. (Really. How could you not go “Looney” getting to meet animation’s greatest characters?)

But as week as the story is, (and some might disagree with me on this) it’s leagues better than the first one’s. Having the Tunes exist in a digital world makes much more sense than being underground. And for that matter, LeBron’s actor/son’s conflict actually gets some sort of payoff. Unlike Michael’s actor/son who mopes a bit, cheers up upon finding his dad was kidnapped by animated characters, then disappears until the denouement.

And the crossover aspect! If you can fathom the idea of someone never seeing “Ready player one” or any “Avengers” movie, then you can probably believe me when I say I was getting goosebumps when all of Warner’s properties gather to watch the game. But there’s a downside to that too. After they assemble, they don’t do anything. Yes, they’re the audience, but the original film let its audience react a bit more. (The most we get here is a pout from King Kong.)

For that matter, the original utilized the Tunes universe just a bit better. The team you see in all the advertisements? That’s pretty much all we get. Marvin and K-9 get a little screen time, when everyone sans Bugs is coerced into seeing what other worlds they can explore there’s a group shot of many minor characters. It just goes by so fast one can’t enjoy it. (I was able to see Rocky, Muggsy and Playboy.) And Canasta appears in the “Mad Max” universe. That’s it.

Wasted potential there. Why couldn’t they join the rest of the crowd for watching?Too expensive to animate? Which reminds me, the animation was gorgeous. Not spectacular. There’s nothing on the levels of “Fantasia” or “Spirited Away.” But what we get is a real treat. Vibrant, bouncy, and looney. Just what I expected and wanted. But that’s the 2-d stuff. How was the 3-d?

I won’t lie. It looks good. And that’s a relief considering how computer generated animation trying to look like it really exists ranges from nightmare inducing:

“I’m the reason animated spider’s are drawn with simple mouths!”

To laughably pathetic.

“Did I miss the auditions for “Pan’s Labyrinth”?”

The voice acting was nice as well. Zendaya Maree Stoerme Coleman did pretty good as Lola. Heck, if I didn’t know going in, I would’ve figured Ms. Bunny was being voiced by a 25 years older Kath Soucie. And the basketball stars voicing the villains did an admirable job. And mentioning the villains, I thought they were a lot of fun. Even if super-powered mutant basketball players feels strangely familiar.

“Good news, everyone! The public no longer has to remember us via “Pixels!”

It’s a good thing they were a joy to watch, as they don’t get nearly as much screen time as the Monstars. And one of them appears too late, and disappears too fast. Why wasn’t he there from the start? Oh, and while I’m discussing the villains: I found Don Cheadle entertaining, but not Pete. He did nothing to further the story. Completely superfluous. But the Minions have made it so animated films won’t sell if there isn’t at least one tiny, annoying, comic relief character that wouldn’t be missed if cut out completely.

The weakest part of the film in my opinion? The ending. I won’t spoil it here, but it didn’t make a whole lot of sense to me, and seemed to wrap up a bit too fast. Lucky for me the fun stuff starts a lot quicker than its predecessor, so I don’t feel like there was a bunch of wasted time squeezing the entertaining middle.

And that pretty much wraps up my first thoughts after my first viewing of the first “Looney Tunes” film I’ve been able to see in theaters. My rating is just a few more lines down.

Short version of this post: I quite enjoyed it.

Favorite Part: Really, I did get chills seeing such a large crossover of properties. It might change in the future, but it’s the winner for now.

Personal Rating: I’ve been seeing fairly negative reviews from other people. I however, feel that if you go in expecting to see a movie that is more “fun than substance,” you’ll have a good time. (It’s the film equivalent of a lollipop.) Therefore, I grant it a 3 for the basic crowd, and a 4 for my fellow Looney-tics. (Yes, really.)

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Skyscraper Caper

“What an easy job this is going to be. I think.”

Directed by Alex Lovy; Story by Cal Howard; Animation by Ted Bonnicksen, LaVerne Harding, Volus Jones, and Ed Solomon; Layouts by Bob Givens; Backgrounds by Bob Abrams and Ralph Penn; Film Editor: Hal Geer; Voices: Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by William Lava. A Merrie Melody released o March 9, 1968.

Daffy has a bad case of sleepwalking. Bad enough to have him walking out of his house. It’s a good thing that Speedy catches sight of this, but his warnings aren’t enough to wake Daffy, and the duck walks into a lake. (Speedy’s house seems disproportioned. Daffy comes up to its roof, but Speedy seems to be half as tall as that. I don’t know. It seems off, but there’s plenty more to complain about.)

Speedy offers a solution: Daffy gives him 5 pesos, and Speedy will watch over him. Waking him in case he sleep walks again. And, believe it or not, Daffy not only agrees to that, but happily so! He’s not convinced that’s too much? He’s okay letting Speedy in his house? This is not the Daffy I know and love. He’s…he’s gone. He’s changed for the worse, just like everything I’ve ever loved. (Fine. I’ll tone it back a bit.)

Staying up all hours is a tiring job, so Speedy rigs up a rope around Daffy’s bed. If Daffy walks into it, it will ring a bell that will wake them both. Speedy will then take the credit. He even has the nerve to ask Daffy for another payment for his services. Unbelievably, Daffy pays up. (Even calling it worth paying for? Daffy, come back to me, pal!) It’s not a perfect plan. Once Daffy exits his bed the other way, he completely bypasses the rope.

Daffy walks out of his already open door, and heads into town. (It’s clearly midday now. How late do those two sleep?) And now, halfway through the picture, Daffy makes his way to a skyscraper. It’s still under construction, but this is one of the oldest known cartoon ideas. Someone will blindly stumble around the place, but always be saved at the last minute. It’s worked with Popeye, it’s worked with Mickey, it’s worked with Bugs. So, it should work here!

And they immediately botch it up. Daffy walks onto a girder, walks to the edge, and…just stands there. BOR-ING! You took the fun out of this gag, why exactly? Now Speedy wakes up and notices the duck is gone. He rushes outside, (not taking the bell for no reason) and sees Daffy still WAITING on the edge of his beam. Speedy is fast enough to make it there, and keep Daffy from falling more.

There’s an ice cream man there. He doesn’t look happy. (But I suppose he is selling at a construction site. There can’t be much business.) His bell wakes Daffy up, and he falls off the building. He grabs on to the side, and saves himself from death. Speedy lowers down a NOOSE that Daffy is supposed to use to get back up, by sticking his head in it, and pulling the other end to get himself up. (Why are these two’s personalities switched?)

Daffy manages to get back up, but a jackhammer sends him back down. He grabs a clock hand, and, for no other reason than to get some more pain out of him, the hour hand begins turning at a rapid rate, hitting Daffy multiple times and causing him to let go. He bounces around the area, thanks to awnings, and telephone wires, before landing in Speedy’s wagon, knocking him out. Speedy returns him to his bed, and Daffy is convinced the whole thing is a dream. (I wish I could think the same.)

Favorite Part: Speedy telling the sleeping Daffy to wake up. Once he’s in the water, Speedy remarks that he is awake now. (Yes, that was the highlight.)

Personal Rating: 1. The characters were out character, the jokes weren’t funny, and the animation was as poor as it usually was at this time.

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Road to Andaly

“You crazy sthtupid bird!”

Directed by Friz Freleng; Co-Director: Hawley Pratt; Story by John Dunn; Animation by Norm McCabe, Don Williams, and Bob Matz; Assistant Layout: Homer Jones; Backgrounds by Tom O’Loughlin; Film Editor: Lee Gunther; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Bill Lava. A Merrie Melody released on December 26, 1964.

Apparently, this short’s working title was “Tequila Mockingbird.” I won’t lie, I like that one better.

It’s a well known rule of the universe: Sylvester can’t catch Speedy. He certainly does try, but the mouse is too fast, and his “Yee-Haw”‘s are liable to scare one over a cliff. Still, there’s gotta be some way, right? Otherwise, Sylvester is going to lose all respect for himself. Oh, what to do, oh, what to do?

Luckily, it’s not too weird if Sylvester just walks into a pet shop with intent to purchase one of the animals within. (Now that I think about it, is there any rule that says pets can’t own pets?) Sylvester opts for a falcon. (Because this pet shop has those. They’re kept right between the okapi’s and the tuataras.) The bird’s name is Malcom. This should definitely tip the scales, as the peregrine falcon is the world’s fastest animal. (Although, looking at his plumage I’d say that Malcom is really a merlin.)

Sylvester sics the raptor on the rodent, and Malcom does seem to have an easier time keeping pace with Speedy. However, he is currently keeping a rather tight grip on Sylvester, and the putty tat gets dragged into a cactus. New rule! When Sylvester says “Let Go!” Malcom should do just that. He’s a quick learner too, as the next chase goes very similar to the first, and just like it, Sylvester demands to be let go. (Once he realizes how high they really are, he asks to be caught. Too bad Malcom hasn’t learned that command yet.)

As Sylvester whispers to Malcom, Speedy, naturally wants to know what its all about. Sylvester won’t share, so Speedy tries to play it cool by saying he has his own secret. Better than theirs, and he keeps it under his sombrero. He asks the two to not peek while he naps. Sylvester is angry at the suggestion He would never go over there, peek under the hat, and learn what is under it. That’s why he has a falcon to get it for him. (He’s also abashed at how dumb Speedy was to trust him with his hat.) The secret: a firecracker.

Malcom is ready to call it quits as any non-anthropomorphic predator would. Sylvester can’t let him do that. It’s an insult to his species. Surely the next chase will be a success! Actually, Speedy has a trick ready. Pouring salt on the bird’s tail feathers. As the legend typically goes, this should immobilize the bird. Malcom looks scared, but Sylvester pours some of the seasoning on his own tail to prove the claim as false. Although, as  mammal, it should have no effect anyway. (Would that trick work on any and all birds from choughs to tinamous? Science should look into this.)

According to Speedy, as soon as they wiggle their rear ends, their tails will fall off. (Oh. That wasn’t what I was expecting) They give it a try, and it works! They are officially tailless! (From Malcom, this is really just an embarrassing inconvenience. Sylvester just lost a limb.) The two have no choice, but to head back to town for glue. As for Speedy? He really should have kept that salt in a safer location. It pours on his tail, works its magic, and he has no choice but to follow his pursuers back to town.

Favorite Part: The ending. It’s refreshing to see Speedy fall victim to his own scheme for once.

Personal Rating: 2

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Bugs Bunny’s Howl-oween Special

“Beware! Beware!”

Producer: Hal Geer; Directed by David Detiege, Abe Levitow and Maurice Noble; Story by Cliff Roberts; Music by Harper McKay. A TV special aired on CBS on October 26, 1978.

Halloween is such a fun time of year. You can be as macabre as you want and nobody bats an eye. Having any excuse to eat nothing but chocolate is also a bonus. And unlike other holidays, this one doesn’t have any deeper meaning anymore, and is used solely as a fun excuse. And naturally, there are plenty of cartoon treats on the side.

This special consist of clips from other “spooky” themed Looney Tunes and edited together with some new footage. (Sort of like Frankenstein’s monster.) Even if you aren’t the expert on these shorts, like I am, it’s not hard to tell where edits were made. Voices sounding different and animation not syncing up properly.

We start with a bit of “A-haunting we will go.” Right after Daffy’s nephew warns of the real witch, and his uncle drags him out to prove him wrong, we cut to a snippet of “Broom Stick Bunny.” Hazel still invites Bugs in, but doesn’t explain why she is giving him a tea designed to un-uglify someone. Even more confusing, after Bugs reveals himself to be a rabbit, she still wants him to drink, as she sees “that witch” as a threat. (You’ve lost me. Can a rabbit be a witch? And if the two are combined, will that spell the end of all witches?)

Bugs refuses to drink her tea, saying that he only will drink the kind his doctor makes. So, now we jump to a “Hyde and Hare” clip. While Bugs is chased by Hyde, his screams wake up a sleeping Sylvester, and we next jump to an abridged “Hyde and go Tweet.” After that, Bugs has somehow managed to escape Hyde and samples his formula. Now properly scary, he leaves to try and frighten Hazel. She is immune, turns him back to normal, and that makes him fall asleep. Next up: “A witch’s tangled hare.”

After all that, we finally catch up to Daffy arriving at her place, with most of that short being played. It cuts right after Daffy leaves. (Here’s an omission I never noticed before: when Speedy tries to make Daffy drink, the table is gone. But there is still a chunk of Speedy’s clothes missing that is table shaped.)

After all this, Bugs is still not impressed with Hazel’s attempts at being scary. She decides to show him, by frightening the cat that is accompanying Porky who is coming to stay at her house, since she put up a vacancy sign. (She now lives amongst some other buildings? Magic works fast!) So now, we get a mishmash of “Claws for alarm” and “Scaredy Cat” playing. And despite Hazel saying SHE is going to be the one scaring the cat, he runs off when Porky orders him to get out. (Not to mention, was she doing anything? Were all those mice under her control?)

I guess Bugs is convinced, as he offers to team up with her to frighten people, and proposes a toast. Upon drinking she turns into Count Bloodcount and “Transylvania 6-5000” plays. To be fair, they put in some new dialogue here, with Bugs wondering where the witch went, and Hazel speaking instead of the vampire. (But they don’t explain why Bugs is dressed as an umpire suddenly. Unless you’ve seen the original, you’re going to be confused.)

Once back to her self, she chases Bugs as she has had enough of him. (I do love the face he makes as he runs away from her.) This leads to our last clip from “Bewitched Bunny.” This time, once Hazel is transformed, Bugs doesn’t make a sexist remark, and just notes that no one wants to be alone on Halloween. The two then go to share Hazel’s brew.

This special is kind of a mess. The cartoons don’t always flow together neatly, and will probably confuse anyone over the age of five. I’m sure little kids will love it through and through, but that doesn’t include me. Here’s wishing any of you REAL people who read this, a happy Halloween. (Seriously though people. Stop leaving your spam on my website. You’re just wasting your time.)

Personal Rating: 1 (You’re better off just watching the original shorts)