Category: Cinecolor shorts

These cartoons were shot in a different color process then usual. Didn’t stop them from being hilarious.

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Holiday for Drumsticks

‘YOU WILL SOON BE SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS AND CRANBERRIES!’

Directed by Arthur Davis; Animation by Emery Hawkings, Basil Davidovich, J.C. Melendez, and Don Williams; Story by Lloyd Turner; Backgrounds by Philip DeGuard; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Carl W. Stalling. A Merrie Melody released on January 22, 1949.

That’s a wonderful date to have a thanksgiving picture! No sarcasm here! I could probably handle seasonal depression easier with such a glorious feast! Please don’t leave me, summer! Life’s not worth living when it’s not you. And as for the actual plot…

Pa and Ma are hill folk, so they’re used to having some neighbor trying to kill them on a daily basis. Or even sooner. They’ve learned to make the best of it. Using the shots fired to open pouring holes in the coffee pot, light matches; the mundane things we all hate doing. Once they’ve gotten their use, they’re sure to plug ’em right back. Otherwise sleep would be awful difficult. Since Thanksgiving is approaching, Pa has brought home a turkey. Once he’s fattened up a bit, there will be plenty for me. I’m willing to share the cartilage.

Daffy isn’t at all pleased with his new roomie. (Yardie? Coopie?) According to him, there’s barely enough to eat as it is, and now most of that is going to the turk. Daffy stops him though, pointing out what’s going on here: they feed the turkey, in turn, he will feed them. Sounds fair to me, but Thomas is kinda selfish. Per Daffy’s coaching, he exercises as hard as he can. Faster! Stronger! Better! With all that lovely food going to waste, Daffy makes sure it goes to waist. Wait, confusion alert!

Does Daffy know about the actual plans? He kinda acts like he’s trying to pull a fast one. Has he really seen this happen before? Why all the hamming then? (Look who I’m talking about.) Why not be straight with the bird? “Hey fatstho! They’re gonna take a knife to ya! Why not let me eat the mostht to keep you trim? Nobody eatsth duck on Thanksthgiving!” Does he think Thomas won’t believe him otherwise? Why doesn’t Daffy encourage him to slim? I’ve seen a duck eat turkey meat. He really seemed to be enjoying it.

When the fated day arrives, the results are extreme. Thomas is basically spine and feathers. And a head and limbs of course. Daffy is a meatball. (What bird skeleton is on his munching table? Did Daffy stop any potential chance of turducken?) Pa takes one look at the turkey and deduces that he’s not healthy, and unlike other predators, humans only want the meat with the strength to fight back. As long as it’s tipping the scale of course. Daffy matches that description, and worse, I checked the rules; there actually isn’t anything saying you can’t have a different kind of fowl to celebrate the glory of the fourth Thursday. And duck is almost as tasty as turkey.

Daffy does his best to slim himself down, but it’s harder for him. He lacks Thomas’s discipline, and determination. Read: Pa keeps shooting all the exercise equipment. Daffy begs Thomas for help in hiding, which leads to what usually happens whenever Daffy asks for a turkey’s help, as evidenced in “Tom Turk and Daffy”. I’ve yet to actually discuss that one, and that’s probably why I have few visitors and fewer feedback. Ah, me. In case, you don’t know what I’m talking about, Thomas consonantly puts Daffy in painful hiding locations, deciding each one isn’t good. Wait, confusion alert!

Why is Thomas messing with Daffy? Even if Daffy hogged all the food for himself, the Thanksgiving threat was real. He helped saved you. Is he just trying to make sure the people don’t have to settle for turkey skeleton? Are turkeys just pricks by nature and I don’t have to feel guilty for enjoying their delectable muscles? Because as an animal lover, I have to. Thomas does have an actually sound solution: flee the country. The odds of death by Thanksgiving china, turkey and grease reduce significantly in places like China, Turkey and Greece. (I’m not proud of that one.)

Now that Daffy is dazed from the extreme hide and seek, he is happily wiling to waltz into the stove Thomas is calling a boat. (Hilariously, Ma and Pa are getting in on the action too, dressed as sailors.) If you think this ending is too dark, that’s just cause Ma can’t get a match lit. Daffy blows them out one by one. I guess he’s too fat to just leave the oven? He’s gotta Winnie-the-Pooh his way out now.

Favorite Part: As immature as it may be to say a funny face made me laugh as much as I did, the face Pa makes when he realizes how juicy Daffy is did me in.

Personal Rating: Well, it’s tough to say. A few confusing character moments didn’t help my scoring, and it was pretty much a weaker version of the previously mentioned “T.T.A.D.”. I’m feeling generous though. It is now officially recognized as a member of the 3 club. Welcome, and here’s your club robe.

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The Lady in Red

‘Smoke El Cigarro’

Supervision by Isadore Freleng; Animation by Robert McKimson and Ben Clopton. A Merrie Melody released on September 7, 1935.

Manuel’s cafe is closed for the day. He’s a blood-hungry psychopath who likes to watch bull fights. I bet it’s where he gets all his meat. Well, I think I’ll break into his establishment and vandalize the place in memory of my bull friends. I won’t be alone; his place is crawling with cucarachas. This might lead you to believe that it isn’t a very sanitary place. But, no. That’s not it. What it means is that Manuel built his cafe in a habitat that was already perfect for roaches. And he made it better by giving them access to more food.

If you still doubt, then yes, I am one of those crazy animal lovers who found roaches cute before I saw “Twilight of the Cockroaches.” I can’t help it. The way they try to scurry to dark spaces reminds me of a child under their blankets, and my maternal instincts do the rest. I’ll never get a woman, but if she wouldn’t accept this part of me, we wouldn’t last anyway.

The cockroaches enjoy a good meal when they use their food as sustenance, and a good sport when they use it as a plaything. Olives make splendid bowling balls, and root vegetables function as pins. (Gasp! That one disappeared! It’s a vanish radish!) Peas are more suited as tennis balls, and that’s really about it. Other spheroid foods are too big to be used in their games/ aren’t on the menu. Otherwise, they’d be using gumballs as the billiard variety.

Since they prefer the dark, nightclubs are an essential part of the community. You can dance, you can listen to Roachy Vallee sing, and you hear the musical instruments. (It’s hard being a pipe player. You tend to get cancer.) One of the star performers is our titular character. And she’s a right cutie, too. Admit it, you want to dance with Jessica Roach too. No need to be shy. Not like the scarecrow-ch in the audience. He faints at her beauty. He better be able to protect her from some dangerous animal if he ever wants a chance with the roach in red.

Manuel also has a parrot. I don’t think he loves it as much as he could, because its cage is minuscule. I took the lock off, so the poor guy can stretch his wings should he choose to. And if he wants to eat some roach meat, I won’t interfere. Part of being an animal lover is accepting the fact that some of them have to eat the others to survive. The animals accept that part about me. The bird pulls Jessica out of the club, and a chase ensues. He can be a little scary. He’s not anthro, and his screeches sound legit. If you were an insect, you’d void your cloaca.

But not the scarecrow-ch! He finds his courage and manages to chase the parrot off by lighting the stove the bird’s standing on. Poor thing flies away from where the cock-a-roaches dance and wallow in romance. At least his burning tail feathers can let him spell out the end. Even while dying, he’s a clever bird.

Favorite Part: The guy playing the peanuts as if they were maracas. He’s got a mad smile that tells me he has fun with his job.

Personal Rating: 2.

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The Merry old Soul

“Daddy!”

Supervision by Isadore Freleng; Animation by Rollin Hamilton and Riley Thompson; Music by Norman Spencer. A Merrie Melody released on August 17, 1935.

For many of us, life equates to misery. And being social creatures, misery is subtracted by keeping company. Therefore, the only way you’ll ever be happy in life is to get married. (Note: this is not exact science. Many people are even more depressed after tying the knot. I actually know nothing about happiness, joy or cheer.)

Even someone as merry as King Cole is just faking it most of the time. Pipes and bowls do nothing for his mood. Even his fiddlers would rather stick just with themselves. That’s why they got a bow that can play all three of their fiddles at once. Now, they never have to part. Good thing he’s a king! Ladies love powerful types. Even better, his kingdom is full of wonderful bachelorettes. The winner of the regal roulette is none other than the woman formerly known as the little old lady who lived in a shoe. Now she’s going by Mrs. Cole.

Everyone is happy for the couple. Humpty, Spoon, and Dish are so glad that their lips almost slip off their faces. Talk about mouthing off. Others were so gleeful that they cloned themselves so the background could repeat if necessary. It’s close enough that I don’t think casual viewers will notice. And Puss in Boots shouldn’t be here. He’s a fairy tale character! No, they are not the same thing as nursery rhymes. Either choose one, or you’ll have to say they live in a world of nursery tales. And no one wants that.

With the ceremony over at long last, now Cole can get to know his wife. He clearly never read her life story like the rest of us, since he’s surprised to find that now HE has so many children; he doesn’t know what to do. Who would have thought that getting married meant you’d have to share responsibilities? Actually, why would he think that? Being a king means he has servants to do things like that. And why aren’t they living in his castle? Is a shoe that much of an upgrade? It’s not even real leather.

And so, Cole is now worse off then he’s ever been. Even his three-way fiddlers gleefully sing about how lousy his life is. I won’t lie, it got a smile out of me. And I’m the morose one! His main duties are caring for the youngest ones. Mrs. Cole is no longer in the picture, so you can assume she married him to have a babysitting cuckold, and I’ll assume that she’s busy caring for the older ones. I like to imagine that all marriages work out, and the two involved never stop enjoying each other’s company.

Caring for these babies means giving them a good bath. Scrub them down, then let them rinse off in a lazy river. It looks soothing to me. Well, not that automatic ear cleaner. That’s a good way to spread infections. Next, drying and powdering. Sometimes the kids have hair, sometimes they don’t. They must’ve gotten it from their biological father. Now, which nursery tale character could he have been? Can I make him up?

Jeremiah Dread, sucked his hair into his head, which then gave a little tickle to his brain. Filled with mirthful glee, he then rolled into the sea, and we never, ever, spoke of him again.

Answers all my questions.

The next step seems pointless: Cole uses balloons to float the infants over to the next conveyor belt. What’s the point of that? Just giving them a little knees breeze before their loins are once more imprisoned in their diapers? Then you slip them into pajamas and they’re ready for bed. They like to have a lullaby while they’re rocked, and don’t dare try to sneak off before the rem cycle. They’ll scream. When they finally snooze, Cole decides to take a breather himself. But two tykes aren’t unconscious…

It’s Nip and Tuck. They’re the naughty ones. They start the rocker up full blast, which not only shakes their siblings awake, but flings them onto Cole. He joins them in their bawling. The end.

That was a depressing ending. But it’s relatable, right folks? I guess we’ve all learned that true happiness can only be achieved by childless couples. With a dog.

Favorite Part: I have a strange sense of humor. I thought it was funny that three of their children aren’t Winken, Blinken, and Nod. Rather four of their children are Winken, Blinken, AND, and Nod. It’s abstractly cruel.

Personal Rating: 1. Putting aside the unpleasant finale, it’s mostly nothing but a baby factory picture. We’ve seen that before, but better, and later, but fantastic.

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Into your Dance

“It’s only the beginning, folks!”

Supervision by Isadore Freleng; Animation by Cal Dalton and Ben Clopton; Music by Norman Spencer. A Merrie Melody released on June 8, 1935.

Oh happy day! The riverboat’s a coming to town! You’re not going to want to miss this! It’s one of those showboat riverboats that promises music, singing, and an opportunity to pelt performers with produce. Captain Benny introduces us to our conductor for the evening, the world’s most popular orchestra leader. Which by my definition means Porky P- HOLY CRAP! It IS Porky! Same design and everything! Except, it can’t be. This short isn’t listed as part of Porky’s filmography, and no audience would dare pelt him with tomatoes lest I slice all their middle toes off and replace them with their thumbs. (I’ll throw the toes away.)

Well, I’ll still file this short in my Porky file, just in case anybody else thinks the Paul Whiteman pig is who I wish he was. He starts up the band, but there’s somebody constantly screwing up. Look, I’m sorry, but you just can’t have that in music. Otherwise it’s just cacophony. I give my complete support in Mr. Pig malleting you.  But the screw-up refuses to own up to his own shortcomings, and decides to stick that curly tail in an electrical socket. (At least, I think this is the same guy.) This really accelerates the performance, and the spastic conducting makes the “William Tell Overture” twice as fast. Boo! I like that piece? Where am I supposed to hear it now? “The Band Concert?” Okay!

Music’s done. Now for the singing I promised you. It’s amateur night, so we get an excuse to be honest. First off, Miss Cud doing opera. Hm. Uh-huh. Yep. Gong her. We won’t miss much. The performer remover hook yanks her right out of her clothes. (Does the Hayes code know about this?) Next, Beans’s effeminate father recites poetry. This also kinda sucks really bad, so lets get rid of him too. I mean, sure, he was better than that cow, but I’d hate to give him first prize when I’m sure there’s something better coming along. (If you think you’ve seen the crowd before, you have if you’ve read my posts chronologically.)

The next contestant may look a bit dumb, but he is smart enough to rig things in his favor. He sends Benny off to do… something, then hides the gong in his pants. Can’t eject what can’t technically fail. But, yeesh, I thought Doughtery only ever played Porky. Not so, and the crowd isn’t too pleased either. I think, anyway. Their jeers kinda sound like laughter half the time. But it must be hate, because once the guy finishes the title song, he sees the entire audience had a walk-out. Furious, Benny chases the cheater with a nail ‘n board into the hills. Every time he lands a hit, the gong reminds the world that cheaters are natural losers.

Favorite Part: Though poetry he may try, it turns out Beans’s pop is a fighter at heart. When he is gonged, he takes up a fighting stance. Good thing Benny was prepared with a horseshoe filled boxing glove!

Personal Rating: 2

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A Horsefly Fleas

“As long as they’re gonna chase me anyway, I might as well get paid for it.”

Directed by Robert McKimson; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by Charles McKimson, Phil DeLara, Manny Gould, and John Carey; Layouts by Cornett wood; Backgrounds by Richard H. Thomas; Effects Animation by A.C. Gamer; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Carl W. Stalling. A Looney Tune released on December 13, 1948.

All work done between November 5th and December 10th continues to be lost. And I’m still in the dark about it. And I’m still UPSET about it. Any info on WHY this happened would be lovely. And you know what else? I don’t think I ever want to retype them until I get an actual explanation as to what happened.

It’s the return of A.! You remember A., don’t you? He’s that flea with the catchy song about dinner being around the corner. Yeah, that guy! Seems eating Elmer and Willoughy wasn’t a bright idea after all, as A.’s singing about finding himself a new home. (Now being voice by Mel as opposed to Sara Berner.) But he’s not alone for long. Another animal that normally feasts on mammalian blood is outside, and that’s a horsefly. (An animated horsefly. Which means he’s 80% horse.) Cars have made his “mane” food supply dry up.

Since they’re both in need of living quarters, A. invites his fellow pest to join him in the homestead hunt. The best looking land can be found in the mountains. (A dog.) They fly over and start settling. Chopping “trees” makes a mighty fine cabin, but a shelter won’t be of much use without a food source, so A. begins digging a “well”. (Never called an incision that before.) Of course, the “land” is aware of these activities, and scratches at the discomfort causing “earthquakes.” But that’s only the biggest concern in literal terms.

This “land” is “Indian” flea territory. (Really? The “land” doesn’t look like a jonangi to me.) These fleas look like Miniature Injun Joes, so you know they mean business. A. wasn’t foolish enough to try taking land without guns, and he’s a pretty good marksflea. At least five chibi Joes change up their usual diet and bite the dust. But A.’s shots are a finite amount, and he and his horsefly soon have to do what the title suggests. The chase begins and neither snow nor sleet (flea powder and… more flea powder) slows down either chaser or chasee.

You know, I think these native fleas really do have Joe’s blood in them. They have the stamina to wear down a horse fly just chasing on their feet and skis. A. and D. (Horsefly) are tied to a “tree” and a fire is lit beneath them. The “land” draws the line at this, and heads to the outdoor fountain to extinguish itself. In the panic and confusion, A. and D. escape via stolen canoe. The Joes still pursue them, but the “land” doesn’t care too much. It’s just glad to be his own “land” for once.

But not for long. The circus has just arrived! See, this “land” is actually their winter quarters. So, those little Joe’s aren’t really natives then? Well, they are now as their continued chase of A. leads all of them into the center ring. Just in time for wild west show! The “land” by this point decides to just take things in stride and enjoy the show.

Favorite Part: A. looking over the sign that warns he’s entering “Indian” territory. After doing so he comments that he probably misses out on important details being illiterate and all.

Personal Rating: 2. Light on new gags, D. doesn’t really contribute enough to warrant being part of the title, and it could be viewed as offensive today. But at least I’ve finally discussed A.’s entire filmography.

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I wanna play House

“♪ I gotta sing, ’cause I’m gay…♪”

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x8angw1

Supervision by Isadore Freleng; Animation by Cal Dalton and Sandy Walker; Music by Bernard Brown. A Merrie Melody released on January 11, 1936.

If you were a time traveler, and you used that power to just go back and watch every Looney Tune and Merrie Melody in theaters in chronological order, you’d find this cartoon to be the debut of those famous rings that you associate with these shorts. (It’s always been the perfect way to frame the many characters who came after the rings left the screen.)

Out in the woods, two black bear cubs play. (Yes, black bears can have brown fur, you racist.) I think they’re siblings, and I’m claiming they’re both female. But to be on the safe side, I’ll give them the gender fluid names “coal” and “mud”. They’re wrestling and exploring the world, skills that will serve them well should they manage to survive to adulthood. Sadly, often times learning something requires a bit of pain, and Coal learns that even without teeth, a turtle bite hurts.

This amuses Mud, no end, and Coal ain’t having it. She flings a rock at her sister’s face. Look how fast it moves! She’s already displaying great strength! But Mud has awesome reflexes and doesn’t get the stone. Their father does. (Again, assumptions. They’re sometimes right!) He wants to know who did it, and both of his girls naturally blame the other. Personally, I’d always blame the first to deny, (Coal) but father bruin decides to rely on the spit test. You spit into your paw, smack it with the other paw, and whoever the exportation lands closest to gets the punishment. Spit says: Mud.

She gets some spanks (making cries that sound to me like ones you’d hear in a Dingo Pictures “film”) as Coal walks away. Happily, Mud doesn’t seem to hold any animosity and is eager to join a game of hide and seek. She’ll count and Coal will hide. With the game underway, Coal finds a caravan and takes a look inside. Whoever owns the place never learned the most important rule of camping: PUT YOUR FREAKING FOOD AWAY LEST YOU ATTRACT A LAND BEAR! They’re getting no pity from me. I hope Coal’s insatiable lust for the human vittles doesn’t hurt her chances of having cubs of her own one day.

Coal knows all about sandwiches, and makes herself a snack. And since there’s a jug of cider, a drink as well. It’s the hard stuff, and she’s drunk not too long after. The short has been frequently cutting back to Mud’s counting and she finally calls it quits after hitting 1,000,002; leading me to believe this has been going on for weeks. (And I guess Coal was supposed to call out when she was hidden?) Mud isn’t happy to find her sister lushly singing and cavorting in a human dwelling. She hits Coal with a tomato.

Tomato’s are nature’s sobering fruits, and Coal is cured and angry. The two wrestle, and accidentally unstick the brake. Since parking on level ground is for those who aren’t snorting jugs of hard cider, the vehicle careens down the hill; it’s two stowaways doing all in their power to steer. They eventually get the idea to use the brake once more, slowing the vehicle down, sure, but also losing the wheels to extreme friction. They crash, and seem relatively fine, but the cider jug hits Mud on the head, putting her into her own kind of daze. This is exactly the situation you don’t want your-

Father comes to his cub and sees her stumbling by a jug. That’s enough evidence for him, and Mud gets more spanks. (And you thought I gave her that name because of her fur, didn’t you?) Coal decides to get out of there once again, but this time a rock manages to hit her cranium. But we didn’t see who picked it up! Was it her sister getting sweet retribution? Or her father giving her some punishment for joyriding? What’s your guess?

Favorite Part: When drunk, Coal laughs every time she hiccups. It’s adorable. As is witnessing anybodies first drunken stupor.

Personal Rating: 2. Not a lot happened, and it wasn’t as fun watching Mud get unjust punishment as you’d think it is.

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The Country Mouse

“It looks bad for the challenger!”

Supervision by Isadore Freleng; Animation by Don Williams and Jack Carr; Musical Score by Bernard Brown. A Merrie Melody released on July 13, 1935.

Somewhere in the country, is a mouse named Elmer. He’s the local hero amongst his circle of friends, including Beans and Mickey Pig. He may be a mouse, but he’s quite muscular. (And his muzzle sometimes changes from beige to brown.) And he’s got a goal of someday going to the city and becoming a very successful fighter. But right now, his grandma has other plans: chores.

Muscular is probably the mice’s actual last name. Elmer doesn’t chop down trees, he uproots them. Then he slices them into boards as easily as a razor blade through crisco. Granny is not impressed. She’s the type of hard-working, hard-smoking, hard-chewing grandmother, and she doesn’t uproot trees, she punches them down. And when she hears what her grandson is planning to do with this life, she drags him home by the ear. If he can’t stand up against his kin, what chance would he have in the city?

But his mind is made up, and he leaves in the dead of night. He must have pretty good connections, because it looks like he’s been booked into the ring the very next day. (I suppose time could have passed, but I figure Grandma would have tracked him down by then.) This is a pretty important fight too. It’s the “championship of the world!”. And the announcer is a… desman, I think? (Look them up. You might agree with me.) Elmer is going by “The Hickville Threat.” (Which is either the wimpiest name I’ve ever heard, or just the worst.) His opponent is a bulldog that is known as “The Run-some Bulldog.”

The fight begins and Elmer isn’t as outclassed as some other guys I’ve seen. He manages to get in a few good punches. But you can’t beat the champ, because he’s the champ, and Elmer gets himself a good beating. Back at home, Granny worriedly listens to his exploits on the radio. Deciding that she can’t stands no more, she makes like a biker mouse from Mars and bikes all the way to the city.

The crowd is loving the violence. (It’s the spastic monkey in the back and the drunk bonobo in the front that make it for me.) Just as it looks like Elmer has lost, Granny enters the ring. She takes the champ out with one punch, and is declared the winner. Nice crown. Elmer got something out of it too: a couple of black eyes. And I don’t mean what you’re thinking, his sclera is ebony! For running away from home, Granny punishes him in the most humiliating way she can: a spanking in front of a crowd of thousands. At least he’ll be famous now.

Favorite Part: Elmer is recovering in his corner, aided by a pig trying to bring him to. It works, but the pig wasn’t done playing the hero, and punches him back out.

Personal  Rating: 3

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Billboard Frolics

“SEE THEM AND HEAR THEM”

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x836f0u

Supervision by Isadore Freleng; Animation by Cal Dalton and Sandy Walker; Music by Bernard Brown. A Merrie Melody released on November 9, 1935.

We must begin today’s post with what happened at to me at Comic Con: I had a great time. Twice as many people asked me for photographs than last time, two people asked me to dance and sing, (one of whom filmed me) and I lost count of how many compliments I got on my costume. (My favorite was the guy who said and I quote: “Hell yeah! Michigan J. Frog!) Apart from that, it’s a real pleasure in life to see the current voice of Bugs Bunny in person. I can die a happy man, death! Any day now!

Now for today’s post: A very popular story to tell in animated features anymore is “What does ‘X’ do when I’m not around.” It’s been going on much longer than just lately. Exhibit A is our short, today. Today, it’s what the characters on billboards do at night. (Which is coincidentally the premise for one of Illumination’s upcoming films. They’re calling it: “Billboard Games.” It will be mediocre but have an impressive box-office return.)

We begin with an advertisement for the musical duo of “Eddie Camphor” and “Rub-em-off”. They sing a merry melody that I feel should be the theme song to a series of theatrical short films someday. Plenty of ads join in the fun. A cute Cuban dances on her travel ad, Mexican tamales sing along, and Russian rye bread do their expected squat dance. The one I don’t get is the smoking toy penguins. Is that a reference? I’ll be very grateful if you educate me.

Since these are living ads, they can do things that our boring reality ones can’t. Namely, they can hop off of their billboard and traipse around the “real” world. That’s what the chick on the “My am I?” billboard does. (Is that one a reference? Is it just a play on Miami?) He has seen a worm and he is eager to be a part of the food chain. But this is one wily worm who doesn’t want to give up eating crops for being eaten and placed in a crop. (Bird humor.)

Now the funny thing about food chains is that they are almost never are two links long. The local alley cat is happy to take his part in nature’s grand design. Even if his prey of choice tastes like acryllic paint and advertising. My-am-I decides to make a retreat. (I love his face. Why hasn’t that been memed? You fools always seem to neglect my best ideas!) Good thing the board members have such a strong union, and begin fighting off the predator. Including sending out the next link in the food chain: a dog.

The cat manages to trap Fido in a pipe, and he continues chasing the chick. The bird finds himself trapped against a dead end. (Which will be literal if a last minute save doesn’t happen.) The little guy is saved by the baking soda ad on the nearby wall. (Ham and Armour brand, of course.) That chick certainly has something to crow about now.

Favorite Part: When chasing the worm, the chick has an adorable angry face. Coupled that with his non-threatening “cheeps” makes me just want to fawn over him, cuddle him, and give him that worm. (Cute things always get precedent.)

Personal Rating: 3

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What Makes Daffy Duck?

“Keep up the good work!”

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x84p3gx

Directed by Arthur Davis; Story by William Scott and Lloyd Turner; Animation by Basil Davidovich, J.C. Melendez, Don Williams and Emery Hawkins; Layouts by Don Smith; Backgrounds by Philip DeGuard; Voice Characterization by Mel Blanc; Musical Direction by Carl Stalling. A Looney Tune released on February 14, 1948.

During one particular duck season, Daffy has two hunters interested in him: nature and mankind. On the former: we have a fox. No name. Until now. (Frank it is.) The other side is represented by its usual “champion,” Elmer. Both want him real bad, and neither is willing to let the other have even a feather. Daffy knows the best way to settle things: a race. First one to the lone pine in the distance is the winner.

The two make ready, but Frank is one of those sly foxes, and never actually runs. With Elmer gone, the fox takes his dinner in the opposite direction. Daffy makes things more difficult by calling out to Elmer, and pouring oil on the hill Frank is ascending. The fox runs from Elmer’s gun and ends up smacking into a tree. Elmer takes aim at Daffy. In turn, the duck gives his sob story about always being hunted, and the paranoia getting so bad that he is happy when he’s finally killed. Elmer lets his guard down for a minute, and Daffy uses this opportunity to mallet the hunter’s head and escape.

Elmer may be the type to get outfoxed by a fox, but he has a bit of a brain as well. He disguises himself as a female duck, and is able to lure Daffy closer, because Daffy is desperate for any female form. (Seriously though, that is the ugliest duck disguise I ever saw. Even the ugly duckling wouldn’t want anything to do with her.) Daffy also catches on to the disguise rather fast, but plays along. (Even offering to get “her” a chance with the W.B. I can’t explain the scary look in his eyes, though.)

While offering to show the lady some of his sketches, Daffy blows a duck call to wake Frank up, who is still at the foot of the tree he crashed into earlier. (Nice touch.) Coming to, he sees the “lady duck” and tries to make off with her. Neither predator is too thrilled to see the other again, but since Elmer has the gun, he has the advantage. (But Frank has some height on him! Either he or Elmer is not the correct size for someone of their species.) And since Daffy lassoes Elmer, (because he can, I guess) Frank takes the duck away.

He makes some impressive distance between him and Elmer, but the hunter is right behind him anyway. Daffy tells the fox to fight for his dinner, and the vulpine finally grows a pair and stands up to the gun. While the two fight, a dog game warden appears. (That’s not odd, don’t worry.) He puts up some signs signalling that duck season has ended, and fox season begins. And just like that, Frank is fearful once more. Elmer takes after him, and the warden reveals to us that he was Daffy. (See? Perfectly logical.)

Favortie Part: When Elmer has Frank at gunpoint and tells him to put his hands up, we learn that Frank’s human-esque hands were really gloves hiding paws! Not I’m wondering if there’s another reason Bugs, Mickey, Sonic and magicians wear those…

Personal rating: 3

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Along Flirtation Walk

“21! 18! 36! 32! Hike!”

Supervision by Isadore Freleng; Animation by Bob McKimson and Paul Smith; Musical Score by Norman Spencer. A Merrie Melody released on April 6, 1935.

Tomorrow is the big game! (Actual Big Game date may vary. Please consult a calendar instead of me to get your facts straight.) Good old Plymouth Rock College. So much better than that preppy Rhode Island Reds University. (Think they’re better than us, do they?) To hype everyone up for tomorrow’s event, a dance is being held. And quite the progressive one for the time period at that. Nowhere else in 1935 will you see a chicken dancing with a duck.

Sure, he’s civil when he meets her on the street.

Outside the dance is the perfect place for young couples to get some privacy. The poor bird on the end only looks like they’re lonely and alone. Actually, they’re just nervous about the game tomorrow as they’re competing. Romance doesn’t play any part in today’s story. (But it ties in so well with the title song.) Next day, game day! Our two teams are raring to go! Look at those fine specimens! The coaches should be really proud of those boys! What’s the event anyhow? Cockfighting? Crowing? Something masculi- why do they look ready to lay eggs?

Wait, those are hens? Good twist! Call me a sexist pig all you want, (I like being compared to swine.) but I wasn’t expecting an all female sports team in the 1930’s! Much less one that gets such a turnout. So that’s settles things then. The event is egg laying. Seems like something best kept private, but I should really learn to be more accepting of other cultures. But one thing that can’t be rebutted is that it looks painful. And people think women don’t want to play painful games.

So our little black hen from earlier is named by me! And I’ll name her Penelope. (Haven’t used that one yet. Not for a bird, anyway.) She wants to be on the field where the action is, buy the coach refuses. (Why is she here then? Answer me that, coach!) Comes back to bite him in the tail feathers by half-time. The opposition are leading by 58 points? Those rotten Reds! (It’s not racism, just schoolism.) And it looks like they have a sneaky way to hold on to the lead. They ingest billiard balls. (They’ll regret it tomorrow when they tear their cloacas apart. What a hemorrhoid.)

It’s working! The crowd can’t tell that eggs that look like billiards are often billiards, themselves. Things aren’t going much better for the Rocks as one of the players had a little too much fun with her boyfriend the previous night, and is now producing chicks. That’s a penalty. And it’s coming at such an inopportune time! There’s only five minutes left and the reds have such an insurmountable lead. Once more, Penelope begs to be part of the game. Seeing as how it’s one of those “nothing to lose, everything to gain” scenarios, Coach puts her in.

What an athlete! Barely on that nest for four minutes, and she’s already raised the total to 99! But the opposition has 100! Just a little more! Two hammers to the noggin equals two more eggs, (Not the Disney series. That sucked.) and thus ends the game! Up yours, Rhodes! All hail our new champion! She doesn’t need a trophy to remember this victory. Her bump will do nicely.

Favorite Part: While we’re looking along flirtation walk, we see a turkey couple ready to make out. Seeing our eager faces, the tom uses his fan as a chastity screen. Then he mocks us. (We deserve it.)

Personal Rating: 2