Category: Cartoons from the 30’s

This is the time period where Looney Tunes got there start! Things may have gotten off to a slow start, but they soon became the envy of studios everywhere!

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Porky’s Tire Trouble

“D-D-Don’t hurt that d-d-dog!”

Supervision by Robert Clampett; Story by Warren Foster; Animation by Norman McCabe; Music by Carl W. Stalling. A Looney Tune released on February 18, 1939.

Starring Porky Pig! (Look at that doofy smile he gives at the beginning. I love this dope!) And yes, it is vital to remind us, as most of the focus will be taken by Porky’s dog of the picture: Flat Foot Flookey. (Don’t you just love names that are tongue twisters? Cause I don’t.) He’s a strange looking one, as dogs go. It’s like Clampett wanted his unit to get Pluto and Goofy for a cameo in one of his shorts, Disney obviously said “Screw off.” (with that charming smile of his), Clampett managed to get a D.N.A. sample off both of them, but accidentally put the two into the same cloning jar. So why do YOU think the dog is wearing shoes?

Porky is heading off to another workday at Snappy Rubber Co. (The scenery is  jumpy today), with the loyal Flat right behind. (I’d really rather not type his entire name out again.) Porky doesn’t notice until the dog enters the building.  Porky yanks him right back out because his boss has some asinine rule that makes no sense to me: No Dogs Allowed. I mean really, what if Porky needed to hug something warm and I wasn’t around? Are you willing to be there when your employee needs you most, boss?

Okay. Tone it back. I’m letting my fanboying take over again. Rules are still rules and Porky has to tie Foot to a car. (Look at the poor dog’s face! Why would Porky do this to him?) I guess it’s a good idea; his walrus boss is another Billy Bletcher role, so he probably can be a pretty nasty foe. But he does his job competently. He uses a machine to chew up rubber trees, and pour the pulp into the giant, novelty waffle irons that Porky mans. Turning out rather handsome tires. How are they considered trouble? Porky handles them like the champ he is.

Flookey (Wait… Lessee… ‘Flat’… ‘Foot’… Aw crap.) doesn’t heed the sign because he can’t read. He digs into the factory, dragging the car along I might add. I do so hope it was the boss’s. (I kinda want to dub him ‘Bletch’ but I’d rather make less references to “The Feebles” than Disney has. He’s not getting a name.) Porky directs his dog to the exit, but the pup steps into a barrel of rubberizing solution. His body absorbs the properties, essentially making him a superhero. Eat it Krypto and Underdog! Before you both existed there was Plastic Pooch!

With the power of rubber, Plastic Pooch does the most obvious thing: turn his face into caricatures! (His Edna Mae Oliver could use some improvements in the eyes, and his Hugh Herbert’s nose changes color. Or maybe it’s just a change of the light?) He can now take on his nemesis: Porky’s boss! He’s fully aware there’s a dog on the premises now, and he aims to eradicate him. (I can tell Mel is doing the shouting for him. That guy was born shouting.) But the dog is rubber, he’s not glue, Plastic Pooch will defeat you! If you grab a hold of him, he can stretch far enough to bite your rear! If you throw him away, he’ll just bounce back! He’s. Gonna. Rub. You. Out!

The boss learns all too well that he can’t rid himself of the Tuniverse’s newest hero. Plastic Pooch ends up knocking him into Porky’s tire press. And now we’ve just witnessed the supervillain origins of P.P.’s greatest nemesis: Snow Tire! Don’t miss the exciting next issue! Our villain continues to get thwarted, and he sure is tired of that! (Wait… “He’s not getting a name!”… Mm-hm… “Snow Tire!”… … Doh!)

Favorite Part: Porky is so chipper, that he even does a little dance on his way to work. Even more adorable is mild mannered Flat Foot copying him. (Oh yeah, Porky is the only one who knows Plastic Pooch’s secret identity.)

Personal Rating: 3.

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Porky’s Pet

“Tickets, tickets.”

Just some pettin’ from the Pork.

Supervision by Jack King; Animation by Cal Dalton and Sandy Walker; Music by Norman Spencer. A Looney Tune released on July 11, 1936.

*Sigh* I was really hoping some sort of Christmas miracle would bring back my lost work. I promise, that’s the last time it’ll be brought up. Now, let’s discuss the first short to have Porky’s name in the title.

Porky’s just received a telegram from someone named J. Botts. (Jo Botts?) We never see the person, but they’ve got a great offer for my pig pal: A job that’ll pay seventy-five cents a week in New York, so it must be Broadway related. But it’s not just Porky who’s going to be big, so will his titular pet, Lulu. He rushes to her cage to tell her the good news. How cute! She’s a canary, then? She’s an ostrich.

Now, I’ve always loved ostriches. Probably my first favorite animal before I moved on to yaks, then bats, then newts, then goblin sharks, then hermit crabs, then hamsters, before making pigs my final choice. So I know a fair amount about the largest extant birds. For example, I’ve never known one to speak in a strange garbledygork of insane laughter and English mumblings. And her size and appetite mean that she must be a heck of a hassle of a pet. But I see genuine love in her eyes for the Porkster, so I can’t and won’t interfere with the heartwarming bond between them. (Though I COULD give her a good home…)

Well, with the future calling, P. and L. traverse to the train station. Climbing aboard, it appears that Mr. Pig can’t take a trip with a pet in tow. (Dogs are allowed but not ostriches?) Well, Porky just tells Lu to run ahead of the train and he’ll sneak her on. (Why not just ride her? How far is your journey, anyhow?) She may look like a birdbrain, but she understands and the plan works great. Porky was able to pull her into the moving train by her neck. He is our new god.

But now comes the difficult part: keeping her hidden. She’s a big girl, and is quite noticeable. Lucky all the other passengers are willing to stay mum on the subject. Still, she’ll have to stay out of the conductor’s sight. Porky stuffs her under the seat with some difficulty, but she’s a wide-open spaces kind of bird! She doesn’t stay put and decides to put her special ostrich talent to good use. That’s her appetite. She roams around the area eating whatever catches her eye. Toupees, toy planes, musical instruments. She’d probably eat a baby if she came across one.

Crap! The conductor approacheth! In a panic, Porky hides Lulu into the only thing big enough he can get his mitts on: a cello case. (Why did someone bring an empty one along?) This hardly works before Lulu stands up, giving the conductor quite the ride and interesting story to tell later on. When she’s revealed, he doesn’t need to react with surprise or fright. He grabs her without so much as a flinch, and throws her out the window. Porky is next to go, though he gets the more dignified exit via the back door.

The two are still a long way from Broadway, but their ingenuity sees them through. Tying a nearby handcart to a nearby cow gives them a means of transportation that’s even faster than train! Bet the conductor feels embarrassed now!

Favorite Part: A small thing, but I like how the concertina Lulu swallows is labeled as such. So many people think they’re accordions, but here you’ll have no excuse for the mix-up. (Unless you can’t read.) Together, we can help raise awareness.

Personal Rating: 2. I think I preferred Donald Duck interacting with an ostrich. Hortense was way cuter, too.

(And yes, I know female ostriches don’t have black plumage. But since this isn’t “Fantasia” I can use the grayscale to my advantage and blissfully believe that Lulu is just a very dark shade of brown.)

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Jeepers Creepers

“There’s somebody at the door.”

Supervision by Robert Clampett; Animation by Vive Risto; Story by Ernest Gee; Musical Direction by Carl W. Stalling. A Looney Tune released on September 23, 1939.

October is that magical time of year where any mystery is believed to have a supernatural conclusion. To wit, mysterious sounds are being heard at an abandoned building and that means we have to get the police involved. ‘Pig’ might be a derogatory term for those in blue, but in this case, the kop is wearing black. He’ll solve this mystery, and he doesn’t need any “Porky Snacks” to boost his confidence.

The old house is really creepy. Lovely atmosphere shots help build the chills. It’s got bats, rattling shutters, wails and shrieks. That last thing can be explained by the radio inside. So someone is living here? Well, I wouldn’t use the L-word. If the tenet’s voice is any indication, I think this is taking place in the alternate print of “Lonesome Ghosts” in which Goofy didn’t make it out among the breathing.

This goofy ghost loves to scare because that’s just what ghosts do even if they don’t intend to. Whilst waiting for people to scare-ify, he likes to relax with a cigar. I’d tell him those are bad for the health, but I don’t think he has one. Besides, he bathes himself to get the stench out. No sense in scaring folks off before they even lay eyes on you. Officer Porky arrives on the scene, and the ghost lures him in. Here’s wishing you a sporting chance buddy, because my Porky worship tells me that he ain’t a scared of no ghosts.

The ghosts plan? He’s going to put some quacking frogs in shoes he’s tied together, to make it looks like they’re walking by themselves. Seems like a waste when you have a real ghost on the premises. (And are the frogs quacking so I can’t make any jokes about the ghost making them “croak”?) Porky doesn’t notice them, so they keep hopping forward because frogs like being crammed into shoes and would never try to hop out of the opening. The ghost opts to bang a serving platter over Porky’s head instead. (Sometimes we have to sacrifice originality for reliability.)

But the frogs come through for ghost boy, as they end up dragging a hat rack into a curtain, and making a decent specter of death in the process. I guess the pedestal I put Porky on must shatter, as he does indeed freak out upon seeing this thing. He wants out. The ghost decides now is the time to reveal himself and Porky is so petrified, he has to rip out the floorboard his feet refuse to move from. He bolts up the stairs, and unknowingly right into the arms of the ghost. Who has the audacity to mock him. (You made your point, dude. No need to be an a-hole.)

Time to leave! Legends say that ghosts won’t follow you out of the house they’re haunting, but those legends were started by lazy ghosts. This one has a work-ethic and is able to overtake Porky’s speeding car. Beware of hitchhiking ghosts! Porky isn’t one to pick up strangers though, and leaves the ghost with his exhaust. Which sadly means we end this fun Halloween treat with a blackface gag. (At least Rochester is a cool guy to reference? ???)

Favorite Part: The awful description the police chief gives for ghosts. “Those white things that go *evil laughter*.” He’s lucky Porky didn’t go arrest Dick Cheney.

Personal Rating: 3

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Bosko the Musketeer

“Hi-dee hi! Ho-dee ho! Ho-dee hey!”

Animation by Rollin Hamilton and Robert Stokes. A Looney Tune released on September 16, 1933.

Bosko gallivants along to visit Honey. (Bruno briefly appears, but won’t be featuring.) This surely ain’t no surprise visit, as Honey is dusting all things that might be any and every. (Poor fish looks uncomfortable.) Bosko arrives just as she finishes dusting a painting of the three musketeers. Truly awesome folks, eh Bosko? He’s not too impressed and starts fencing with an umbrella while his honey, Honey, sings.

And suddenly the screen dissolves to Bosko actually BEING a musketeer and fencing with a SWORD against four adversaries. Sounds like a daunting task, but Bosko’s got a an arm up his sleeve that can do a trick. Namely, letting the gauntlet do all the work while it nips out to unleash keg contents on the four anti-musketeers. Speaking of, counting Bosko we’ve got one short musketeer and two short. And a name like that will never sell. Where’s the rest of them?

In the tavern of course. Since their is three of them, I guess Bosko is our D’Artagnan. Can you name the others? I’ve never read the book or seen any film adaptations, so I’m useless. (But I’ve eaten the candy bar several times!) What a pal, Bosko is. Always looking out for those of us who spent our high school years reading “Asterix” comics for our french fix. I now know that they go by Athos, Amos and Andy. (Truly the “Star Wars” of their day if the amount of references is any indication.)

Lets sing! Dance! Have a good time! Drink and be merry! Look! They’re even inspiring Mickey clones 205, 634 and 431. Swell guys, these musketeers. Even if they do have a habit of using oddly quick cuts to down their drinks. The whole place loves these guys! And yes, that includes clone 511. But it doesn’t include the obvious villain; a man with really hairy hands, or prickly pears attached at his wrists. And now Honey arrives. Is she part of Bosko’s imagination? Or did she take over telling the tale so she could self-insert herself into it? Who imagines the imaginer?

Well, she’s not in period appropriate clothing, so I guess Bosko is the creator of all we’re seeing. (That’s why she can be as topless as she always is.) Obvious villain grabs her, which can’t be at all pleasant with whatever extremities he has coming out of his arms. Bosko to the rescue as the other three have suddenly ceased to exist. Or maybe they’re just giving him a chance to prove himself? Sword dueling commence! Both are evenly matched and damage to their weapons doesn’t automatically mean they’re out. O.V. has a caddy, and Bosko’s sword fits in the pencil sharpener.

Bosko is ultimately the victor because he places a shovelful of hot coals into his adversaries pants. Thus bringing Bosko’s little power trip to a close. But Honey doesn’t believe any of it. (Was Bosko claiming it really happened?) So Bosko busts out the big question: “Was you there, Charlie?” (But… you had her there. So were you really rescuing some homely lady the whole time and you just inserted your girlfriend to get brownie points?)

Favorite Part: While Honey entertains the tavern with a dance, Bosko can’t help but gush about her to the nearest patron. It’s sweet.

Personal Rating: 2. Pretty standard Bosko saves Honey plot. If you’re thinking the two should retire by this point, don’t worry. They only had two more shorts with the W.B. after this.

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Hare-um Scare-um

“You don’t have to be crazy to do this. But it sure helps.”

Supervision by Ben Hardaway and Cal Dalton; Story by Melvin Millar; Animation by Gil Turner; Musical Direction by Carl W. Stalling. A Merrie Melody released on August 12, 1939. (Unusual title card. It appears to be night on an iced over pond. Which I wouldn’t doubt Proto-Bugs doing, but I can’t tell if my guess is intentional.)

If you look at today’s paper, you’ll find that meat prices are rising. You’ll also find Hardaway self inserting himself and advertising his work. (I think. He spells ‘merrie’ “right.”) This angers the man holding the paper, who if the copyright is anything to go by, is named John Sourpuss. I don’t know if the voice Mel’s supplying is the best choice. Makes him sound forty years older than he probably is. He decides that the only thing to do is go out and hunt his own meat. Good thing he has a gun casually leaning against the wall. (That’s not safe.) He takes the dog he was sitting on, and they head out to get some rabbit. We literally barely knew him. (What’s that picture on his wall? A giant parrot in a tricorn stuck in a galleon?)

Being pre-1940 means our rabbit of the picture will be played by Proto-Bugs. He’s kind enough to leave some stamped prints for his pursuers to follow, and crazy enough to have already placed one stamp ahead of his progress. He also plays ‘Guess Who’ with the dog. Smart little feller is able to figure out who it is eventually, and his prize is a log roll down the hill. Coming out dizzy and weak gives P.B. the opportunity to play doctor. You can tell he’s medically licensed because he doles out the best medicine: laughter.

When John finds the hare/rabbit lying in the sun, he decides to salt him up right then and there. (It’ll make his death all the more tasteful.) Proto-Bugs holds out his celery to catch the seasoning, while changing he feet’s fur color for a half second. Jeff can’t follow him into his burrow, because it’s now an elevator. (And yes, Jeff will continue to have those purple rings around his eyes for the rest of the short. This was the moment where I gave up thinking this was another coloring error.)

It’s the dog’s turn again, and Proto-Bugs does something the Definitive-Bugs will become well known for: dressing in drag. Puppy likes what he sees and eagerly accepts the lady dog’s invitation to sit down. When he’s ready to make-out, Proto-Bugs is completely unfazed that the costume is ripped off, and just supports the dog’s choice in mates. Angry, the dog gives chase, but the bunny in cop attire and invisible motorbike pulls him over for speeding. Then he just blatantly reveals who he is and runs off. Song time!

Nope, I’m not trying to be as screwy as him. (I couldn’t compare.) He really does sing a catchy little ditty. The same tune with different lyrics would eventually be sung by Bugs. (This picture is instrumental in shaping up the rabbit we would all come to love and secretly wish to be. But upon finishing his song, he finds John right behind him with gun pointed. Proto-Bugs lays on the details on why he wouldn’t be good eating: being thin and sick. Oddly enough, this gets John crying too. Maybe he’s just upset that this guy won’t make a decent meal after all? Looks like he’ll have to pay the $20.00 a pound for the porterhouse, after all.

The rabbit then gives him a joy buzzer handshake and flees again. Angry, John demands he come back and fight. He is also stupid enough to keep running his mouth and states that he can beat the hare and his whole family. They eagerly accept his challenge, and if you were watching this cartoon on T.V., things would abruptly end here. But the actual ending is thus: They thrash him. Driven mad, John imitates Proto-Bugs, hopping and hooing into the distance. Which got cut because it’s too similar to this ending? Odd reasoning.

But before I go, I want to mention what I was originally told was the real ending. I don’t remember where I read this, and looking back, I don’t recall any sources backing it up, but it was so out of left field that I’ve never been able to forget it. The ending I was told of has the rabbit clan beating the hunter (and dog) all right, but after the dust clears, all that is left is their severed heads! Which would then roll away into the distance. Whoever came up with that must’ve had the worst day in recorded history. Or they were an angsty teen. (Friggin’ psyco.)

Favorite Part: During the song, P.B. finds a Looney Tunes billboard, complete with Porky cameo! *Fanboy squee*! Shame he tears it up. I needed some wallpaper.

Personal Rating: 4. The writing is top-notch! I was deliberately leaving out Proto-Bugs’s wisecracks because you’d love hearing them much more than reading them. Almost makes me wish he stuck around more before evolving. But Daffy really was the more fleshed out screwball, and I’m glad they gave their next one his own distinct version of the personality. It holds up better in a historical context.

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Little Lion Hunter

“Shh.”

Supervision by Charles Jones; Story by Robert Givens; Animation by Philip Monroe; Musical Direction by Carl W. Stalling. A Merrie Melody released on October 7, 1939.

It’s Inki’s first day on the job, so we can expect a few flubs. Example: despite what the title clearly states, he’s throwing his spear at any and all animals. (Although, in seriousness, if a giraffe chooses to bend down to eat, it’s asking for death.) Being early in his short career, Inki also looks a bit different than we’d later know him. He’s got large lashes, and a shiny black nose. Making it understandable that I used to think he was female, and you thought he was a deer.

The kid finds some tracks that surely lead to some big, dangerous game, so Inki takes cover behind a tree. And the ‘dangerous’ part comes true when we see what comes from the direction of those tracks: the world’s REAL most deadliest game, the Minah Bird. (You can identify him by his flashing wings.) He clearly didn’t make those tracks, he just killed whatever did for intruding on his territory. (If it was lucky, it wasn’t made to suffer. No promises with this bird, though.)

Inki makes another rookie mistake, he decides to tackle this creature. He follows it, waiting for the perfect moment to use his spear. It either never comes, or he squanders it, as the bird hops into a hole. Now, you should never, never, never ever, never, never, ever put your hand into any hole this bird hopes into, if you value said hand and think there will even be a remote chance that you will use it again. Inki is lucky today, just pulling out a sleeping skunk. Perhaps the bird is giving him one break for being so new at this.

Inki decides to hunt tortoises, as there is less danger involved. But after following the reptile into a log, he finds himself back in the company of the destroyer bird. Having not gotten the hint that he should really flee while he still has eight toes, he throws his spear. Bridging a gap that the bird had no problem jumping into, because even gravity knows better than to try and kill him. Hence the bird’s ability to hop vertically up a tree. Inki climbs up after him, and ends up with the bird on his head. Said bird tries to bite his nose off for daring to let his scalp touch the bird’s talons. (Well, would you like to tell me what the bird is doing?)

While trying to squish it or something, Inki only manages to knock himself back to the ground. He’s managed to escape painful death twice now, so he should really leave the mynah bird hunting to the professionals. (Current members in that profession: -1,000,000,000.) But hark, sounds! (In a jungle? No way.) Sounds like some kind of game is coming close. Inki just needs to listen to find out what he’s up against. It’s the very thing the title said he should have been hunting all along: a lion.

The lion is much closer than Inki’s hearing suggests, and the beast has to physically tap the boy to make his presence known. Inki immediately knows he is over his head now, and bolts without even looking at the cat directly. (Good. He’s learning.) He also knows the basic rule of lion survival: hiding in a hollow tree stump works! They are not one to question why a stump has an eye, or what those horrible screechy, scratchy noises are. (I guess there the sounds of Inki trying to creep away?) But he forgot that this trick only works if you stand still. Even lions know that stumps don’t stroll.

With the lion totally aware, Inki has no choice but to accept his fate. But just then, things are made either worse or better by the appearance of who else was in the stump, good old, terrifying old, the Minah bird. The lion isn’t aware that he should flee while the fleeing’s good; animals can’t learn from mistakes that will kill them. It pounces, and a terrific tussle takes place off-screen. When the bird is done proving who the king of the jungle is, the lion is roughed up, tussed up, and ready for slaughter, but the bird feels he has made his point.

Instead, he lets Inki know that he saved the kid from the lion’s digestive system, and kicks him for bothering him in the first place. It’s here where you learn the twist that I just made up: Inki had found a genie, and wished to survive an encounter with this bird, three times. He probably thought that would mean he’d kill it each time, but you know what pricks genies are.

Favorite Part: When Inki is hiding from the lion behind a tree, the lion taps him on the shoulder. Inki figures out who’s poking him by squeezing the lion’s retractable claw out. Nice subtle teaching!

Personal Rating: 3

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Young and Healthy

“Wake up, you chump!”

Animation by Rollin Hamilton and Larry Martin; Music by Frank Marsales. A Merrie Melody released on March 4, 1933.

Within every tapestry, there is an entire other world. In the one featured in today’s picture, it’s the 18th century life-round. And it’s also France so that means King Louie’s in charge. Prepare the royal staircase! Sound the color-changing horns! And cheer! In this universe, you might as well worship your leader because you’ll never get a different one! Hail! Oh yes, hail!

But despite our hailing, Louie doesn’t seem too pleased. Naturally, that just makes us love the jerk more. But it does make one wonder why our glorious ruler doesn’t smile. Have we failed as sycophants? Well, maybe the king will feel better after he’s taken a nap. I love that he loves to sleep. I love his color-changing coattail. I love his grotesque, ginormous, disgusting mole. I must, since I can’t take my eyes away from it.

In steps Queen Uhglii. She tells Louie that it is time for a ball. And our mystery is solved! Of course Louie is unhappy! “Balls, parties and picnics!” Day in, day out. 365.25 days a year! 4. Ever. They’re not all that fun to begin with, and as our distinguished, and perfect leader, he has to be proper the entire time. And that really starts to eat at you. And the final straw is the queen killing his Durante-flavored Jack-in-the-box. The only friend who truly understood him. The guy who was there for him when we weren’t allowed to. And he’s hacha’d his last hacha.

But Louie does see something that raises his spirits: children! Romping, and smiling and playing and enjoying life as only kids can. (And transforming into each other while they dance in a circle. I miss the days when I could do that.) That is what Louie is lacking in his life: fun. And one can’t ever be too old for that! (A message one should never get tired of hammering in.) You know what? He’s going to join them! And you know what else? The kids seem happy to include the guy. (Even white Bosko who rides in the royal pocket. Something the rest of us will never have the privilege of.) The only hiccup is ole Uhglii. She doesn’t seem too keen on kids. …. Get her.

The kids do this very well. Once her bloomers are on display, the queen runs off screaming much to Louie’s delight. So nice to see him smile once again! The kids have taken over the palace and set right in to making it their new personal playground. Too bad Louie has taken a tumble into a royal fountain and can’t join in. Even worse, since this is where the short ends, the tapestry will now forever depict the king spitting fountain water. Maybe we should find a new one to live in for the time being.

Favorite Part: The way Uhglii calls for her husband. Sounds like she’s calling a pig. And since there are no pigs in this picture, it’ll have to do.

Personal Rating: 2

 

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Get rich quick Porky

“This land is so saturated with oil, that you can literally wring it out with your fingers.”

Supervision by Robert Clampett; Animation by Charles Jones; Musical Direction by Carl W. Stalling. A Looney Tune released on August 28, 1937.

Seen the trailer for the “Tiny Toons” revival yet? You must have if you visit this site. If my eyes aren’t screwing with me, it looks like there may be a protege for ole Gabby Goat! (Why not? Looks like Cool Cat got one. Probably called “Fab Feline”.) They could call the new kid “Chatty Capricorn” or something. (Since most people don’t know the term ‘caprine’.) All this is just my way of saying I’m reviewing Gabby’s final short today.

A businessman named Honest John Gusher (the brother of the guy who invented the fruit snack, no doubt) is preparing a scam. He’s going to fill an empty lot with oil, and pawn it off on the next saps he sees. Sadly, those two are Porky and Gabby. (I like to provide links whenever I indirectly mention a short’s title.) They’re on their way to the bank. Porky has a bag of cash that he is all set to invest despite Gabby trying to convince him to spend it and frivolously at that.

John (who is a… fossa? I think? Or some new species of mammal whose ear can vanish at will.) calls to their attention and offers to sell them the field. Even going so far as to demonstrate that it has indeed got the goods. Now, Porky is a smart pig. He knows that putting money in the bank is a great option, but oil is valuable. And if you saw a field full of the greasy gold that was being offered to you, you’d find it hard to say no to what would surely be a great payoff. He agrees and he and Gabby eagerly grab some tools and dig in.

Porky makes do with a pickax, while Gabby chooses the jackhammer. (The dirt not only changes color, but shape as well! It must be valuable too!) A dog also stops by to do some digging, but only to rebury the bone Porky unearthed. (Wouldn’t he want to chew it a bit before saving it for later? I wouldn’t ask if he entered the scene with the bone.) He has a bit of a hard time what with oil gushing out of every hole he digs. Making matters worse is a gopher that makes his bone disappear like magic. (That rodent’s appearance makes me laugh. He looks like a naked “Arthur” background character.)

John is still around and he decides to turn the oil off. Porky discovers the trick and is man enough to cry. Poor guy. I want to hug him more than usual. Since Porky is unhappy, John offers to buy the deed off of him for a whole dollar! (A-hole.) Since Porky is pretty much broke, he doesn’t really have much of a choice. But Gabby is still digging and his jackhammering has led him underground, and wouldn’t you know it, there is real, actual, honest-to-god, authentic, genuine, made from 100% dead animals, pure, perfect, not compatible with water, fresh from the ground, o-i-l, oil!

The resulting gusher carries victim and perpetrator up into the sky. Porky is obviously happy that he really is going to be a billionaire, but John’s still got a hand on the deed, and he’s not going to let go! Only a goat with a pneumatic drill could pull him away. So, after he’s pulled away and the two friends land on the ground,  Porky happily holds onto the deed! Oh, wait. It’s that dogs bone. Drat. (John probably got pulled underground and is now realizing that he will eventually become the very substance he was using to swindle people.)

But all is not lost as that gopher pops up and shows he/she has the deed. And they’re willing to give it back, as long as they can become partners. (Poor Gabby.) Porky agrees and to this day, you’ll find G. P. Richfield gas stations in every state of the union.

Favorite Part: When we’re shown Gabby is approaching some real, actual, etcetera, etcetera, it is labeled ‘oil’. After cutting back to Porky and back again, it’s labeled ‘same oil’. You know, in case we thought Gabby was heading for some different oil.

Personal Rating: 3

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The Queen was in the Parlor

“I’d rather listen to ‘Amos ‘n Andy’.”

Animation by Isadore Freleng and Paul Smith. A Merrie Melody released on July 9, 1932.

Today is a day when many a people celebrate a man who is said to have died and come back to life. I’m not one to talk about religion, but I will tie that into today’s featured short, as Goopy Geer did the same thing, just taking roughly sixty years as opposed to three days. This was the last time people would see the guy alive for quite some time yet.

At the only castle in the shot, we decide to see what’s going on. Our king has returned. I call him Sir Pigguy, and so should you. He must be rather beloved as far as kings go, as he gets quite the turnout for his return and they are all singing his praises, and giving adulation. But our king has no time for such meaningless words, as he just wants to know where his wife is. The title is sung to him, and he learns that she doesn’t want to/can’t be seen. Rules don’t apply to kings, so he dismisses the singers and heads to her location.

The parlor is where the clothes mending takes place, as Queen Hippo knits a sock, and Princess Gigi patches up her father’s armor. (Methinks there’s something dishonest with the royal bloodline.) Since our king’s mood has been soured, he demands his jester entertain him. Goopy plays that part and offers to get the royal crooners, “Crosby, Columbo and Vallee”. (A cartoon I’d insert a link to if I’d blogged about it already. Chalk this up to another instance of me whining about how I don’t blog in chronological order.)

The king isn’t amused. Goopy dances for him instead. His little talking stick and hat change color. His left ear vanishes a few times. But darn it, he IS putting his all into things! And a cat fails at catching a mouse. (Something I only bring up to catalog Mickey Clone #248.) While the festivities continue, an ugly knight enters the picture and takes off with the princess. Goopy fights for her, as it’s just jester code. And he manages to hold his own fairly well, even without any proper training.

Still, as an amateur he finds himself flung into an assortment of kitchen wares. The pans, kettles, and graters make decent armor, but not great and he is punched against a pillar, knocking a stuffed ram’s head onto his own. With this new advantage, he is able to knock the opposition right out of his armor. Once the guy gets it back together, he flees. He’ll never recover from such an embarrassing attack.

Favorite Part: Goopy listening in at a keyhole and getting caught. “Are ya listening, HUH?” But I don’t get Goopy’s reply: “Yeah. I bought a windshield.” Maybe it makes sense to those who listen to “Amos ‘n Andy”?

Personal Rating: 2. It’s not such a shame that Goopy disappeared from theaters after this.

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Little Brother Rat

“I once had an egg.”

Supervision by Charles M. Jones; Story by Rich Hogan; Animation by Bob McKimson; Musical Direction by Charles W. Stalling. A Merrie Melody released on September 2, 1939.

Sniffles creeps up on a sleeping cat and yanks out a whisker. He must have a death wish! No, it’s just part of a scavenger hunt he’s taking part in. Bringing it back puts in the lead, beating out Jimmy and flat out annihilating Squeakie. (Even though the list asks for whiskers plural. Oops.) There’s just one last item on the list, but it’s certainly the most difficult: an owl’s egg.

Sniffles accepts the challenge and heads back out again. The cat has come outside too by this point, and begins to follow the little prick who caused him a moment of discomfort. (And upset his sense of balance, let’s be real.) Sniffles manages to avoid getting caught by entering a barn, but the cat has no problem waiting for his return. There isn’t any other holes down here, so it’s a good bet the mouse will return.

Up in the barn, sleeps Papa Owl. (Asleep at night because he’s hungover. I don’t know.) Sniffles easily gets his paws on the unhatched Junior, and is almost immediately caught leaving. The father convinces him to put his child back passively and aggressively. Sniffles is then thrown out from this high, because he’s just too big for the owl to swallow whole. (Nice camera movement.) He bounces off the still waiting cat and is flung right back up again. So, guess he’s just stuck in such a perilous position for the rest of his life, eh?

As if! Winning this scavenger hunt is everything to him! The prize must be that good. (Or he just refuses to be bested by Jimmy. Friggin’ Jimmy.) He tries again, and father doesn’t catch him this time. Instead, Sniffles trips. That’s the end of this egg. Or not. Seems it was just about to hatch as the owlet is alive and unharmed and a chibi version of his father. Sniffles tries to coax him back inside, because it will prove this really is an owl egg, rather than a robin egg. The young bird gets in, but his feet stick out and he walks back to his nest.

Sniffles gets a hold of him once more. And then just puts him back anyway. (I guess he only has qualms about stealing other’s children after they’re born.) Once back outside, he finds the little owl has followed him. Even worse, the cat takes notice of the two and chases. Sniffles carries the young bird, and this kind gesture is witnessed by Mr. Owl. He swoops down, grabs the cat, and throws it down a chimney. (He’ll be back to eat it later.) Because of his bravery, Sniffles is given the egg he needed. Yeah! Eat it, Jimmy!

Favorite Part: The way the owl’s eyes gleam and dilate when Sniffles is spotted. Telling him in no uncertain way that the jig is up.

Personal Rating: 3 for those who can accept a Merrie Melody without much comedy. If you can’t, it’s a 2.