Category: Minor Characters

If a character made between 2-4 appearances during the golden age, then their cartoons can be found in this category.

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Kiss me Cat

“A cat that won’t catch mice, and now a crazy dog.”

Directed by Charles M. Jones. Released in 1953.

It’s a continuation story! (That’s rare for Warner Bros.) Marc Anthony happily sleeps with his kitten, Pussyfoot. (Whose name is used for the first time here.) They are happy together. The lady of the house, (whose name is revealed to be Vi. no relation to last weeks post) tells her husband, Tom, that she has seen a mouse. Despite the fact that Pussyfoot is a flucking kitten, Tom says that if he, (they say “he” but I’m sure the final word is that Pussyfoot is a her. But I’ll just say he for now.) doesn’t catch mice, then they will get a new cat. While he doesn’t outright say they’ll replace the current one, it’s definitely implied. Marc decides to teach his pet to catch mice. He shoves him into the mouse’s hole and the result is too cute for words, so you’ll just have to see it yourself.

Preh-shuss!

But if Tom sees that, then Pussyfoot definitely will be gone. Marc tries drawing some pictures to get the point across. (Pussyfoot imitating his expression.) It doesn’t work and the mouse just uses the cat as a mule once more. Marc attaches some cheese to a jack-in-the-box and the mouse faints at the severed clown head in a box. (Why are these marketed as children’s toys?) He puts the mouse in the kittens mouth and begs Tom to come see. Tom’s too slow and the mouse takes his mule out again. In desperation, Marc shows he can do ballet. Tom isn’t amused. (I am.)

While Marc thinks of a new plan, the mouse lures Pussyfoot into his hole. He sends a ransom note that demands cheese in small chunks, or the cat will be returned in the same style. (Dang. That’s dark.) Marc calls his bluff, until he hears squeals of pain. (Really just the mouse pretending. Pussyfoot is having some milk. He’s not such a bad mouse.) Marc gives in to the demands, and Tom catches him in the act. Marc gets another idea. He puts a magnifying mirror up to the hole and tells the mouse to see the NEW cat. When the mouse sees this, (Pussyfoot only looks mean because Marc Anthony squished his brow down.) he high tails it out of there with his family. (He was just trying to survive? Tom and Vi, you two are evil.) Marc Anthony proudly shows off the champion. Looks like they’ll continue to have many happy days together.

Personal Rating: 3

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Conrad the Sailor

“You’re a sthlovenly housthekeeper.”

Directed by Charles M. Jones. Released in 1942.

Who is Conrad? Well, you asked the right person. If you didn’t ask you are either: A) already quite knowledgeable about cartoons and just come here for my jokes, or B) you are a sad person who isn’t even looking at my blog. shame on you. Conrad the cat only appeared in 3 shorts. All of which were directed by Jones, all of which came out the same year. This is both the only one with his name in the title and the only one where he speaks. His one defining character trait is that he has a little shuffle walk but I like him. His appearance makes me smile. This short was his final appearance. It takes place on a ship. (No surprise.)

While most of the crew appear to be dogs, Conrad is not. Perhaps this is the reason he’s the only one swabbing the deck? Listen to his voice. Does he sound familiar? No, it’s not Mel. Please stop guessing him. Would I even bring it up if it was Mel? That my friends is Pinto Colvig. The original voice of Goofy. Even if he is being discriminated, Conrad cheerfully mops and sings. To his displeasure, he finds muddy duck prints all over. Daffy Duck prints to be precise. After mocking his singing, Daffy switches his bucket of water for red paint. Conrad doesn’t even notice until the duck points it out. Angered, the cat gives chase.

Despite Daffy thinking he gave him the slip, Conrad is right behind him and pulls him into a lifeboat and pounds him. Coming out they both salute the captain, before Daffy is tossed into the sea. That’s obviously not going to stop him. The chase continues when he gets in Conrad’s way of polishing a cannon. Before they can chase though, the captain comes by again and they salute once more. Daffy starts up a game of “Patty cake” using the lyrics to “Pease porridge” instead. Which is a really odd rhyme when I really think about it, why is it not spelled peas? Why are they in porridge? Do people really want to eat porridge that’s nine days old? What is porridge?

They chase, (salute the captain again) and Daffy hides in a gun. Conrad knows exactly where he’s hiding and loads it. When fired, the bullet continues to chase Daffy. Him running behind Conrad, means that the cat has to run too. But this doesn’t stop all three of them from saluting the captain again.

Personal Rating: 3

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Mexican Boarders

“When do we eat? I’m hungry.”

Directed by Friz Freleng. Released in 1962.

In this short Sylvester chases Speedy through the house of J. C. Mendelez. (Him again?)  Naturally, Speedy is too fast to catch, and Sylvester wears himself out just by climbing the stairs. There is a knock at the door. Why, it’s none other than Slowpoke Rodriguez! Haven’t seen him since “Mexicali Shmoes.” (If you translate his song, you find out he’s singing about a cockroach who lacks marijuana. Don’t you dare say he’s an evil stereotype. From what I hear, he’s very popular in Latin America.)

Turns out he’s Speedy’s cousin and the cat gleefully lets him in. Slowpoke lives up to his name and plods in. (I like his hat. It changes color with every step he takes.) Speedy grabs him in the nick of time and brings him back to his hole. Slowpoke wants food. (Also, he’s not voiced by Mel. It’s a man named Tom Holland. Who I’m 96% sure is not the same Tom Holland who directed “Childs Play.”) Speedy offers to get it as he is the faster of the two. He brings back some sustenance. He forgot the tobasco sauce though, and races back. While he’s getting the sauce, Sylvester puts some glue on the ground. Speedy comes back, and Sylvester’s trap actually works. He grabs the mouse, but really should have removed the sauce as it gets poured down his throat.

Slowpoke has enjoyed the food, and wonders about dessert. Sylvester has set up a net which Speedy rushes through. When the cat tries it, he is cubed. That night, Slowpoke is hungry again. I don’t know if he’s trying to let Speedy rest or if Speedy is refusing to go out, but Slowpoke decides to head out himself. Speedy tells him not to, but Slowpoke is fine admitting that he is slow. (Not that way. I meant speed wise.) Still, he is not helpless. (Remember his gun?) Sylvester grabs him but Slowpoke has a different tactic this time. (Perhaps Peta told him to stop shooting cats?)

Making a face that I will undoubtedly see in my nightmares, he hypnotizes the feline. (Unlike in the Pokemon games, this Slowpoke can learn hypnosis. Come to think of it, don’t girls have this power too?) Now under mouse control, Sylvester is forced to fan the mice as they have another feast.

Personal Rating: 4

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Mexicali Shmoes

“I’m too young to go kaboom!”

Directed by Friz Freleng. Released in 1959

Another Academy Nominee! (It lost to a short called “Moonbird.” Nothing should have ever lost to that short.)

Our story begins with two cats. The slightly chubby one is Jose, and the lanky one is Manuel. Speedy runs by pretty much just to taunt them, and Manuel pounces. Speedy naturally, escapes. Jose tells him there’s no point to chasing him, you need brains. Manuel is lacking in that department, but it’s fine. Jose has enough for both of them, and they set out to get some supper. Arriving at Speedy’s place, they invite him out to join their fiesta. Speedy does so, and easily outmaneuvers them when they start trying to take a whack at him. He hides on Manuel and Jose crushes his compadre while missing the mouse.

Plan B. Trying something that he saw “That gringo Bugs Bunny” do in a moving picture, Jose baits a fishing pole with cheese. (I’ve seen every Bugs short at least once, and I don’t recall that. Liar.) Speedy takes the bait, and drags Jose to L.A. Much later, he returns telling Manuel that his sister said hello. (Manuel: “Hello, sister.”) They stuff some dynamite in the hole and wait for the explosion. Speedy sneaks behind them and blows up a bag. They rush off, where Jose shows his true colors. He meant to eat Speedy all by himself. (I think this would have been better as the last gag, but whatever. It’s a good one) They tussle, but Jose wins. Peeking in, he sees they’ve been tricked. He goes back to Manuel to apologize… and tell him that Speedy is rightfully his. Manuel gets a face full of explosive.

They plant some land mines, but end up chasing Speedy through it. Jose is terrified, but Manuel apparently knows where they buried them all, (Under those dirt mounds?) and carries his pal to safety. (I guess I’m wrong. He stepped on one.) Getting out, he accidentally sets Jose down on one of them. Jose returns the favor. They give up. Manuel suggests they go after the slowest mouse in all Mexico, Slowpoke Rodriguez. Jose excitedly goes to the place and grabs the pokey rodent. Manuel tries to tell him something else, but its too late. Slowpoke may be slow, but he’s not defenseless. He packs a gun. And he uses it too.

Personal Rating: 3

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Cracked Ice

“I can almost feel pneumonia, embracing me in its icy grip.”

Directed by Frank Tashlin.  Released in 1938

This short starts eerily similar to the Mickey Mouse short “On Ice”, which was released 3 years earlier. Many creatures are enjoying some ice skating, and we get a few sight gags. Like a centipede’s segments scattering away from it’s body, and a fish skating in a pelican’s mouth. One bird is jumping over barrels. He messes up on the final jump and lands in a open area of the ice. His screams are heard by that W.C. Fields pig caricature we saw in “The Coocoo nut Grove.” (Obviously, his name is W.C. Squeals.) He begins to help the best way he can: calling for someone to help the bird out.

A St. Bernard hears the cries and comes to the rescue. He hauls the bird out, picks him out of his icy prison, and makes him a drink via the various liquors in his barrel. (For the record, it wouldn’t actually help.) This drink succeeds in warming the bird up. But now, Squeals is claiming he needs some too. He is deathly ill, otherwise he wouldn’t touch the stuff. The dog ignores him, so Squeals tosses a boulder into the water, and calls for help. (Even yelling “Splash. Splash.”) The dog comes back and finds he is lying on the ice. Out Cold. (Get it? Don’t laugh. It wasn’t funny.) The dog quickly mixes up another drink… and drinks it himself before leaving.

A voice begins laughing at Squeals. To those of you who don’t know your W.C. Fields lore, you’d think it was just a voice from the audience. To those of you who do know your W.C. Fields lore, you’ll know that it’s Charlie Mcarthy mocking him. (I did not know this was something the two did. I had to learn it from the commentary on my DVDs.) Squeals vows to get the goods. He fills up a plate with bones and sends it sliding towards Fido. Before the dog can chow down, Squeals uses a magnet to keep the dish just out of reach. The dog gives chase and Squeals realizes too late, that he’s going to crash. The impact sends the magnet into a hole in the ice, where it gets stuck on a fish.

While it struggles with it’s new accessory, the dog’s brandy (which was nowhere near the hole) begins to leak into the lake. The fish becomes a “pickled herring” if you will, and swims around drunk. The magnet pulls an axe above the ice after it, and the fish ends up using said axe to cut a hole in the ice around that bird from earlier. Squeals meanwhile, has come to and gets ready for a drink. The fish comes back, and Squeals’s skates are pulled along. The fish drags him to an ice skating competition, where it plays on a clock, (That is just under the ice. Don’t question it) and swims away from a bigger fish. Squeals is pulled along the whole time, and ends up winning the contest.

He is awarded a big trophy. Pleased, he calls Charlie a “Termite Terrace” (always good to slip the bosses a plug) and pours the alcohol into the trophy to drink. Before he can indulge, the fish comes back and ends up dragging the trophy away from Squeals. (Much to Charlie’s delight.)

Personal Rating: 3

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8 ball Bunny

“It’s a boid! A boid in a tuxedo!”

Directed by Charles M. Jones

At a local theater, a show is just now closing. It is the “Ice Frolics” and it appears that their claim to fame is a skating penguin. Why, it’s Playboy. Haven’t seen him since “Frigid Hare.” (He’s not as cute as he was there. But he is getting his name.) But, uh oh! Looks like the rest of the crew forgot him! He desperately tries to catch up, but penguins weren’t exactly made for running. Or flying. In fact, unless he’s chasing a submarine, it’s probably hopeless.

While on the chase, he falls into Bug’s rabbit hole and wakes him up. Bugs is initially hostile, but softens up when the bird tears up. Apologizing, he agrees to help him find his way home. To his dismay, he finds his new charge is a penguin, and they primarily live at the south pole. (Although they do live in other places you know. Africa, the Galapagos, Australia…) But a promise is a promise. As they make their way south on a train, Bugs again announces his unhappiness. (We also have an adorable shot of Playboy hugging Bugs.) Playboy begins to tear up again, and Bugs apologizes saying he can’t bear to see him cry.

A hobo on the car agrees. Why, Penguins is practically chickens. (Well, they are both birds. So, sure.) And crying chickens make him so unhappy, he has to put them out of their misery. Coming to the rescue, Bugs points out that rabbits are bigger than penguins. (Not really, but sure.) The hobo agrees abandoning the bird,  and trying to get his mitts on Bugs. Bugs easily kicks him off the train. At New Orleans, Bugs has apparently had enough, and sends Playboy off on a boat to go the rest of the way. After it sets off Bugs overhears that it’s heading back to Brooklyn. Bugs swims after it, and rescues Playboy from being on the menu. (Are penguins really as tasty as this short suggests? I should test it.)

They make their way to an Island where Bugs forces the bird to build them a boat. Then Humphrey Bogart appears and quotes “The treasure of the Sierra Madre” asking for money. Bugs angrily gives him some. Later at sea, Bugs is going mad with hunger. The hobo’s words echo in his head and he nearly gives in to temptation. Luckily, they seem to have hit land! Bugs however, is not willing to pay 25 cents to pass through the Panama Canal. He opts to travel by land. It’s not long before they are captured by natives and are prepared to be cooked. (Okay, I really need a penguin hot dog now!)

Suddenly, something appears that sends them into a panic! It’s Bogart again. Bugs more happily gives him change this time. After many perilous obstacles, Bugs finally delivers Playboy to the actual pole. As Bugs turns to leave, Playboy begins crying ice cubes. He shows Bugs a flyer. He’s actually the only Hoboken born Penguin. (You’d think he would have shown him that sooner.) Bogart appears again, ready to ask for more money, but Bugs gives HIM the penguin this time and runs off.

Personal Rating: 4

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Barbary-Coast Bunny

“You realize this is not going to go unchallenged.”

Probably didn’t have his iron today.

Directed by Chuck Jones

While he is tunneling to visit family, Bugs strikes gold! (With his head.) His happiness quickly turns to paranoia, as he wonders how he will keep it safe. His fear is justified, as he is being watched by none other than Nasty Canasta. (Not only not appearing with Daffy this time, but also looking like less of a threat. Either way, we know he is not going to win against Bugs.) Canasta sets up a fake bank, and Bugs happily deposits his fortune. As Canasta ties it to his donkey/mule Bugs changes his mind and asks for it back. Canasta responds by folding up Bugs in the fake bank, placing a rock on top and riding off. (What do you know? He did “win after all.”)

6 months pass, and it looks as if Canasta has used his ill-gotten funds to build a casino. He is busy putting invisible ink on the cards with someone walks in. To us, it looks like Bugs Bunny. To Canasta, he looks like the worlds largest lollipop. He asks if he can use Canasta’s “telly-o-phone”. (A slot machine.) Canasta lets him do so. Bugs puts his coin in and pulls the lever. He asks the “operator” for his ma, and complains to her that he needs money. He wins the jackpot and thanks his mother. As he leaves, Canasta (Amazed at what just happened, but not going to allow someone to win in his joint.) asks if he would like to stay and play some games. Bugs suggests marbles and Canasta agrees.

He shows him how HIS version is played. (It’s roulette.) Bugs bets a penny and wins. (Because the game is rigged, and Canasta has buttons to stop the ball on whatever number he wants.) He tells Bugs that in his casino, the customer always wins. (“Really?” asks Bugs in a hysterical manner. Kills me every time.) Later, it’s shown that Bugs has now bet just about all he’s already won. Canasta hammers a block of wood, into the spot Bugs keeps betting on. (A small problem I have: why does he need to do that? He tells Bugs it’s so no one else can bet on it, but it’s rigged. He doesn’t need to worry about that.) He has the ball land on double zero and he laughs so hard, he pounds the table and the ball ends up landing in the knothole of the wood.

Bugs goes to leave, but Canasta suggests they play a game of draw poker next. Bugs is willing to try. Canasta explains that the player with the biggest hand wins, and Bugs blows up one of his gloves. (Canasta: “Cut it out, can’t ya?) Bugs begins to leave again, but Canasta apologizes and Bugs is willing to give him one more try. They play, and Canasta has a full house. Bugs is not sure he won, because all he got was two pair. (A pair of ones, and another pair of ones.) Having enough, Canasta pulls his gun on Bugs saying their going to play another game. (This must be the way they play marbles in Russia.)

Bugs wonders if all you do is spin the revolver. He does so, and even more money pours from the gun. Presumably having gotten his stuff back, Bugs leaves while Canasta tries spinning the gun. It blows up in his face. Bugs tells us our moral: NEVER try to steal karats from rabbits.

Personal Rating: 4

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Hurdy-Gurdy Hare

“Ain’t I a devil?”

Directed by Robert McKimson

One day in the park, Bugs is reading the newspaper looking for job opportunities. He settles on buying a hurdy-gurdy and a monkey to earn money with. With his new purchase, Bugs happily plays music while the monkey collects coins from apartment dwellers. Coming back to Bugs, it’s shown that the tenets stiffed him. Or did they? Turns out the monkey, (who I will call Chim-chim) pocketed it all for himself. Bugs fires him on the spot and decides to play monkey himself. Using a ladder, he pounds on windows for cash, but only winds up with a bucket of water emptied on him.

Meanwhile, Chim-chim is at the zoo. Would you look at that! It’s Gruesome! Haven’t seen him since “Gorilla my Dreams” (Their eyes may be different, but I never forget a face.) He is apparently buddies with Chimmy, and is angered to hear of how Bugs treated him. He easily breaks out of his cage, and heads off to serve revenge. Bugs meanwhile accidentally sees a woman doing… something. (Personal, no doubt. She screams.) Gruesome appears and shows off his strength. Bugs shows he can stick his finger in his mouth, blow, and levitate for a brief second. Gruesome tries, and floats off the building. Taking his finger out at Bug’s suggestion, he plummets.

He comes back, and Bugs asks if he can jump off the building, bounce off the awning and land back where he started. Gruesome tries it, and crashes through the pavement to the underground. Dazed, he exits via an elevator and Bugs (disguised as a subway conductor) leads him back into the hole. Coming back, he gives chase once more. Bugs runs, but not before taking one more peek at that lady. (Naughty, naughty!) He climbs down his ladder, but Gruesome hoists it up, and Bugs climbs back into his clutches. So Bugs climbs it, and Gruesome lowers it, and Bugs climbs back into his clutches. This goes on for awhile until Bugs climbs to the next floor without the ladder.

He starts laying bricks in a window when Gruesome sticks his head in. Bugs finishes his wall anyway, and gives the ape an exploding cigar. He then tricks the gorilla into running out a door back to the ground. Gruesome returns (He has lots of stamina.) and Bugs seems to have run out of tricks. Spying a violin, he aims to see if music truly soothes the savage beast. It works, and Gruesome dances. Getting an idea, Bugs uses the dancing gorilla to rob the terrified populace of their money, while Chim-chim, (who I guess Bugs forgave) plays the hurdy-gurdy.

Personal Rating: 3

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Mississippi Hare

♪Camptown races sing this song, doo-dah, doo-dah…♪

Directed by Charles M. Jones

This short gets censored a lot because of scenes that apparently scream racism. It starts in a cotton field where Bugs is napping. Apparently this is bad, because those are African Americans harvesting it. Well, we don’t see any definitive proof that they aren’t being paid, so it might be relatively harmless, but I digress. He gets packed with the cotton on a riverboat and he climbs out of the hold to see where he is.

He notices that this boat throws off stowaways. Dashing into a cabin, Bugs dresses as a gentleman and shows off the ticket, that I guess was in the room. Secure, he takes a look around. He comes across a gentleman named Colonel Shuffle. (Jone’s take at directing a Yosemite Sam character.) He is voiced by Billy Bletcher and demands for someone to try and beat him in poker. Bugs takes the challenge and bets $100.00 in chips. (Which is half a chip. Ha) Fade out.

Fade in, and see that Bugs has all the chips, and Shuffle has the half chip. With A’s in his eyes, he shows his hand, but Bugs’s is better and he wins it all. He flat out calls Shuffle a jack@$$, (Well, Shuffle did ask for it) and the colonel declares a duel. Bugs walks with him and misses the shots. He shoves an exploding cigar in his mouth, and gives him a banjo to play. (“Racist” part 2. That is apparently blackface on Shuffle. Or you know, ASHface.) Bugs has him dance off the boat and he comes back up with the wheel.

He tries to fire his gun but liquid comes out. It must be a *dons shades* water pistol. Anyways, Bugs disguises as a barker and gets him to enter a show, which is really just a one way trip back into the drink. When he aims again Bugs tells him it’s still full of water and Shuffle checks by shooting himself. Bugs tricks him into the boiler and Shuffle desperately tries to buy a cup of water to put out the fire. He asks Bugs for change and Bugs takes his sweet time. Finally giving it, Shuffle gets the water, and begins firing again immdiately. (Smart. Elmer would’ve walked off before remembering his task at hand.)

Bugs relies on his drag routine and beats Shuffle with a parasol. His wig briefly comes off and Shuffle chases again. Bugs pleads with a much taller man to help him, and Shuffle is tossed off the boat for good. The man comes back to flirt with Bugs and sees his tail. He throws himself off too.

Personal Rating: 3

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Walky Talky Hawky

“I’m a chickenhawk. I’m after my first chicken.”

Directed by Robert McKimson.

We start off at the home of three hawks. (The father of which, happens to read Looney Tune comics. My kind of reading buddy!) Their child is named Henrey and he tells his father that he craves something, but has no clue what. His father decides its time they had a talk. (“Okay pop. Whadyya wanna know?” Love that.) Dad tells him that he is a chicken hawk. And as such, he will crave chicken and everyone will hate and shun him for just being himself. Heavy.

All Henrey takes from this is what food he wants. So he heads off to a nearby farm. There we have the first appearance of Foghorn, who actually is minding his own business, when the first appearance of the Barnyard Dog shoves a watermelon on his head. Foggy can’t be one upped like this, so he paddles the dog with a board, and taunts him at the edge of his rope. (Foghorn sounds more like Yosemite Sam than anyone else in this picture. Give him time.)

Seeing Henrey, he asks what the kid is doing. After learning, Foghorn also tells him that he is a horse and the dog is a chicken. Henrey goes over and takes a bite. The dog chases him before his rope pulls him back. (Foghorn gleefully hits his head to win a croquet game.) He tells Henrey to go back and fight. Predators should not fear prey. (I could discuss that this is not entirely true…) Henrey proves to be very strong for his size and carries the doghouse away. B.D. catches on fairly quickly and gives chase again. And gets choked again. (Foghorn puts a helmet on him, and hits him with a hammer.)

He and Henrey decide to use a complex plan. Henrey sets it up and draws a doorbell on the house to ring with. When B.D. comes out he hears Henrey playing the piano and dances over. Henrey smacks him with a pan. Dazed, the dog stumbles onto a banana peel, which sends him onto a spring, which bounces him onto a skate, which Henrey begins to roll away. B.D. aks what he wants and after hearing of Foghorn’s lies explains that Foghorn is the chicken. Dog and rooster argue and Henrey sees this is going nowhere fast. He releases the dog who in turn pummels the rooster. Their tussle takes them into a stable where a real horse throws them out. They form a truce and go fight the equine. Henrey goes in and drags all three home with him. Figuring that at least one of them has to be a chicken.

Personal Rating: 4