Author: Dr. Foolio

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Looney Tunes: Back in Action! (Part 1)

“It’s a little adventure I call: “Daffy Duck’s quest for the Blue Monkey!””

Great to be back. I’ve been waiting forever to blog about this. So let’s begin.

First: the plot. (I’m going to go into a lot of detail here.) Our film starts with magic: Elmer hunting for “wabbits.” Daffy, is of course changing the duck season signs to rabbit season. When Elmer shows up, Bugs does the classic switch line, and a quick montage of Daffy’s beak being blow off ensues. Daffy suddenly interrupts the cartoon. (But it was just getting to the good part!) He is reading a script, the script for this movie. He tells the Warner Brothers that this is a terrible idea for a film.

Bugs appears; he drops a few names. (I’m pretty sure it’s a tribute to Bob Clampett, Chuck Jones, and Mel Blanc.) He agrees to stay out of the movie, per Daffy’s request, but the vice president of comdey, Kate Hottan, (Jenna Elfman) says it can’t work without him. Daffy tells the studio heads to choose between the two of them, and he is promptly fired. (Look in the background. Poster’s for “Rabbit of Seville“, “Hair Raising Hare“, and “Baseball Bugs“.)

Elsewhere at the studio, (see this is already an improvement of “Space Jam“. It goes the “Roger Rabbit” route and makes toons real citizens. I love “Space Jam“, but even I can tell it’s not perfect. Confusing setting for starters.) A man named D.J. (Brendan Fraser) is auditioning for the role of a stuntman. (The Crusher is one of two people judging his performance.) He doesn’t get the job. We learn that his father, Damien, is the most popular star at the studio. D.J.’s main job is a security guard, but mainly because he doesn’t want to get any roles based on nepotism.

While washing a car, he sees Kate, escorting Daffy out. Bugs is following close behind. She tells D.J. to get rid of Daffy. While they chat Bugs switches places with Daffy because it’s funny, and Daffy escapes. D.J. goes after him in an amusing chase sequence. Daffy runs onto the set of a Batman movie and tries to steal the Batmobile. D.J. gets him but Daffy already turned the car on and it crashes into the water tower and floods the studio. (Hope the Warner siblings weren’t home.) D.J. is fired. (Sure it wasn’t his fault, but Daffy certainly isn’t going to vouch for him.) Kate and Bugs meanwhile, are at lunch.

Interesting cameos here. Porky and Speedy are currently out of work due to political correctness. Speedy I can begrudgingly understand. Not Porky. And unfunny? HOW DARE YOU! Heads will roll. Shaggy and Scooby are also there, telling Matthew Lillard they weren’t impressed with his live action role. One of my few problems with the movie. It’s an awesome joke that can only be pulled off in a movie like this, but why are they here at all? It’s called “Looney Tunes Back in Action”. I know that WB owns them, but they are not part of the title group! If you have to do this, go all out. Put in other Warner owned characters. Animaniacs. Teen Titans. The possibilities aren’t endless, but they’re tons of fun!

Bugs and Kate are discussing the movie. Behind them, Ralph and Sam are eating lunch together. Sam beats Ralph up for attempting to eat a sheep. Kate tells Bugs that he needs a female co-star. (Background images: pictures of Hugo the abominable snowman (“The Abominable Snow Rabbit”) Buddy, the Gremlin, (“Falling Hare“) and I think Chuck Jones. There’s also a poster for “Singing in the Rain” starring Bugs, Daffy, and Lola. Her only appearance in the film. And a missed opportunity for a special feature!) Bugs tells her that he plays females, as he demonstrates. This causes Michigan J. Frog behind him to start singing. Kate says that nowadays it’s creepy, and no longer funny. Wrong, woman. Bugs is one of the few guys who can do that and never look gay. (The demolition worker takes Michigan again. Probably going to try and sell yet another froggy evening.)

D.J. gets home and it turns out he lives next door to Granny, Tweety, and Sylvester. (Yes, she’s still played by June Foray.) Going inside, D.J. finds that Daffy followed him home. Daffy briefly bemoans the fact he was fired, but instantly perks up when he learns who D.J.’s father is. Even believing he’s a real spy. D.J. hears a ringing from his remote and turns on a recording of his father telling him to go looking for a diamond called the Blue Monkey, because Daffy was spot on: the acting was an act! He IS spy!. He also tells his son to locate someone named Dusty Tails in Las Vegas. Naturally, a promise of a diamond has Daffy volunteering to come along. They take a gremlin car that Daffy is convinced is a spy car. (The “Gremlins” theme plays. Brilliant easter egg.) They drive off, and with the space claer, the real spy car reveals itself.

At the studio, it’s pretty clear that the movie needs Daffy to work. Elmer actually ends up shooting Bugs! (And the rabbit is milking it for he’s worth.) Despite the fact that the heads were the ones who fired Daffy, they blame Kate. If she wants to keep her job, she needs to get him back by Monday. But that might be a mite difficult… After D.J. finally gets sick of throwing him out of the gremlin, Daffy mocks D.J. for being a security guard and D.J. tells him he’s really a stunt man, and did most of Brendan Fraser’s stunts. (Laugh, d*mn it!)

Bugs calls Daffy, saying that he can get his job back, but Daffy is not interested, telling of his plans to go to Vegas. Their conversation is being eavesdropped on by a company known Acme Corp. A man named Bob Smith tells the chairman of this news. The chairman (that’s his name, BTW,) has many Vice Presidents. Including ones for Rhetorical question, Child Labor, and Bad Ideas. (Steve Martin is hysterical here. You won’t convince me otherwise.) It’s revealed that he is the one who captured Damian and shows his people proof via camera. (After accidentally getting “I Love to Singa“.) He explains that soon he will be in total control of the world. (He also hits on one of his employees, Mary. Yes this is important.) He also tells his men to kill anyone who dares get in the way.

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN! Cliffhanger! If you don’t know the plot, please don’t go look it up elsewhere. I plan to continue tomorrow, I promise! (If you are reading this at a later time, then just read the next post. It’s finished, I promise!)

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Private Snafu Double Feature: Rumors/Snafuperman

Sorry for lack of post yesterday. Will be going on a brief hiatus for about two weeks. Now without ado…….

RUMORS

“Sounds harmless enough. Innocent stuff.”

This short starts up in the latrine. Snafu is there, and one of his friends mentions that the day is “nice for a bombing.” Snafu thinks about this. Here we see the birth of a rumor. All it needs is to be released into another ear. Snafu tells another soldier that he’s heard they’re in for a bombing. (Okay? He heard the guy say point blank it was a nice day for a bombing, not that it was happening. I just feel Snafu should have heard it in passing for me to believe him twisting the story so asininely.)

The rumor gets bigger and bigger and begins to multiply. Soon, it becomes sentient. (I just want to point out that these rumors are the stuff of nightmares. And it’s awesome.) They soon catch up to Snafu, and they escalate even more and more. They’ve now grown into ‘all the allies giving up’, to ‘us losing the war’. But if you know the history books, then you know we “won”. However, Snafu and the rest of the camp are quarantined with “Rumoritis” leaving him stuck in there with those monstrosities.

Personal Rating: 4

SNAFUPERMAN

“Enemies of democracy: Beware!”

While the rest of the camp is keeping busy, Snafu is busy screwing around. He tells his comardes that studying is a waste and that action is all that’s needed. In comes a sprite known as Technical Fairy First Class. (What a mouthful.) He decides to put Snafu’s money where his mouth is, and turns him into a superhero. Snafu takes a bomb addressed to Adolf and leaves for Berlin. Since he did not take a map, he almost drops it on the capitol. (He couldn’t tell he never left the continent?) T.F.F.C. brings it back, before it can do lasting harm.

Later, Snafu sees a tank and rips it open. Only to find it’s an American tank. (While he should have known that, what was the tank doing here?) Then a mess of messerschmits come along and drop their bombs. Snafu grabs them all and sets them down safely. Turns out they were delayed reaction bombs, and they blow up sending him to the infirmary. (Snafuper doesn’t mean invincible.) There, he yells for T.F.F.C. to bring him a field manual. (Aww, he learned his lesson.)

Personal Rating: 3

So next time, I’ll be talking about something I’ve wanted to talk about since I started the blog. See you after the break.

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Philbert

“Dames are poison to you.”

Directed by Richard Donnor Animation/written by Friz Freleng.

This was a dropped TV pilot. Sad, really. I think it had potential. The premise was a cartoonist’s character coming to life and interacting with the rest of the world. I have no clue why it didn’t go anywhere, but the pilot did get shown in theaters at least once. So let’s begin.

Philbert’s creator, Griff, is stuck for a gag. (See that Model sheet? It’s the real thing.) He’d work on it more, but his lady friend, Angela, is coming over to cook dinner. Philbert objects to this but Griff (played by William Shanner) tells him to not get noticed. (Ladies tend to freak out when their perception of reality gets challenged.) Philbert takes a dip in an aquarium and then attempts to tan in a lamp’s light. Griff’s dog, Hap (played by some random dog) gives chase. Griff finds his creation at the top of the curtains, refusing to come down. Griff promises to catch him just as Anglea arrives. Griff turns just as Philbert jumps.

Griff lets her in and apologizes for only being half shaved. Angela is a pretty nice lady. She even likes Hap. (Short for Happy.) I like a woman who likes animals, so I approve. Even Philbert can’t help staring at her butt and wondering if she has a sister. Griff leaves to empty the rest of the groceries out of her car. While he’s gone, Angela shows her true colors. She hates Hap, she hates the curtains, and Griff’s dead Polar Bear rug. (To be fair, I’d be against that too.) Philbert is especially worried as she plans to marry Griff, and make him get a real job. No more cartooning. (Witch!) Griff comes back, and Angela switches back to “charming” mode. Griff offers to put Hap out. With his main obstacle gone, Philbert now has the chance to remove Angela from the premises.

He draws a mustache on her picture she brought for Griff, and then turns on the radio so she will come see it. She goes to confront him, (the mustache curls slightly) but instead of getting upset, tells him she’s glad that he feels comfortable enough to make jokes about her. It is time for dinner. I think she made shrimp, but I can’t be sure, as she never outright states it, and I’m not a gourmand. Seeing his chance, Philbert empties most of the tobasco sauce into her dipping sauce. This is too spicy for the both of them, but luckily Anglea (played by Joanna Barnes) doesn’t blame Griff. (Although he is sure he knows who it is.) He suggests they dance.

While doing this, Philbert keeps turning up the frequency causing them to dance faster and faster. They give up relatively quickly. So it’s time for champagne. Philbert tosses some “Instant Snooze” in his creator’s glass and they live up to your name. Believe it or not Griff’s yawning is enough to get Anglea to storm out, angrily telling him of how she had plans to make something out of him. (She also takes the picture back too. It is pretty funny.) Later, Philbert and Griff chat and Philbert is glad that Griff is not one to hold grudges. Griff responds by pouring his champagne on Phil’s head.

Personal Rating: 3

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To Beep or not to Beep

“Western Cookery”

Directed by Chuck Jones

A pretty late entry in the Roadrunner/Coyote series. (And the only one scored by Bill Lava.) The Coyote is looking at a cookbook and licking his chops at the thought of a Roadrunner dinner. His prey peeks at the book and also licks his li… beak. He “Beeps” the Coyote into a cliff. On to the gags!

Wile E sets up a snare, but misses and while pulling back on nothing, falls off a cliff. The rope grabs a rock and he ties it around his waist to be safe. He still hits the ground and then the rock lands on his head.  Then he just begins to chase. The Roadrunner puts on a burst of speed which uproots some cacti and makes a bridge recoil. The coyote falls and one of the cacti lands on him. He then attaches himself to a spring attached to a rock, in order to launch himself. The rock itself springs backwards and off a cliff. He holds on, and the rock recoils and he lands on a makeshift teeter-totter which then launches him again and he ends up trapped in between a narrow space. He unstraps himself and hits the ground. (Interestingly enough, Jones wanted to do a whole short based on this one gag.)

After failing with a wrecking ball, we get to the main gag of this short: a catapult that refuses to work. After five tries of launching a rock (and getting smashed by it) Wile E. pulls the string from inside a manhole. Nothing happens. He cautiously does more and more to the device but nothing happens. Not until he’s jumping on the rock does it finally launch. He realizes this a little too late and goes through a cliff face, lands in some telephone wires, gets launched back to the catapult, flung to the ground, and crushed under the rock. Why was it so faulty? We zoom in and see where it came from: The Roadrunner manufacturing Company.

Personal Rating: 3

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Gonzales’ Tamales

“All the pretty girls in love with Speedy Gonzales. What’s left are chihuahuas.”

Directed by Friz Freleng

In Mexico, two mice named Pedro and Manuel are chatting. They’d like to go out and have fun with the ladies but they only have eyes for Speedy. Even the few who are willing to give the men a chance are seduced by Speedy. (Which I have to say is a dick move. Can’t he let the others have some fun? Some of us can’t afford to lose anymore self esteem.) So yeah, Speedy’s the villain in this short.

They hold a meeting to discuss what to do, and eventually decide that they will get the “greengo poosycat” to chase Speedy out of town. (Or just keep him busy.) They send a phony threat to Sylvester that proclaims Speedy will tear his tail out. Livid, Sylvester goes and dares him to do it. Speedy easily accomplishes the task, and Sylvester declares war. He ties to lure him with cheese. (Speedy is well aware of the lure.) Using his speed, Speedy easily gets the (surprisingly shrunk) cheese. Sylvester tries a gun, and Speedy dismantles it piece by piece, leaving a bullet in midair. Shocked, Sylvester pulls the “trigger” and it blows up in his face.

After losing a game of “Hot Potato: Grenade Edition!”, he sends in a wind-up female mouse. Speedy apparently buys it, as when Sylvester comes out chasing, Speedy takes “her” with him. He hides behind a box of chili peppers and tells Sylvester he’s hiding in one of them. Sylvester (rather moronically) buys this story and begins to eat. They are extremely spicy but he’s able to chug some water to keep cool. (Hey, in 1957, they probably didn’t know water does nothing to help.) The second time he tries it, he finds that Speedy switched the water with tobacco sauce. Sylvester launches into the air and we see P. and M. again. (I guess they’re done with the girls. Or they never tried. Maybe they never went to the meeting?) They don’t seem too surprised to see the “gringo poosycat” flying by.

Personal Rating: 3

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Walky Talky Hawky

“I’m a chickenhawk. I’m after my first chicken.”

Directed by Robert McKimson.

We start off at the home of three hawks. (The father of which, happens to read Looney Tune comics. My kind of reading buddy!) Their child is named Henrey and he tells his father that he craves something, but has no clue what. His father decides its time they had a talk. (“Okay pop. Whadyya wanna know?” Love that.) Dad tells him that he is a chicken hawk. And as such, he will crave chicken and everyone will hate and shun him for just being himself. Heavy.

All Henrey takes from this is what food he wants. So he heads off to a nearby farm. There we have the first appearance of Foghorn, who actually is minding his own business, when the first appearance of the Barnyard Dog shoves a watermelon on his head. Foggy can’t be one upped like this, so he paddles the dog with a board, and taunts him at the edge of his rope. (Foghorn sounds more like Yosemite Sam than anyone else in this picture. Give him time.)

Seeing Henrey, he asks what the kid is doing. After learning, Foghorn also tells him that he is a horse and the dog is a chicken. Henrey goes over and takes a bite. The dog chases him before his rope pulls him back. (Foghorn gleefully hits his head to win a croquet game.) He tells Henrey to go back and fight. Predators should not fear prey. (I could discuss that this is not entirely true…) Henrey proves to be very strong for his size and carries the doghouse away. B.D. catches on fairly quickly and gives chase again. And gets choked again. (Foghorn puts a helmet on him, and hits him with a hammer.)

He and Henrey decide to use a complex plan. Henrey sets it up and draws a doorbell on the house to ring with. When B.D. comes out he hears Henrey playing the piano and dances over. Henrey smacks him with a pan. Dazed, the dog stumbles onto a banana peel, which sends him onto a spring, which bounces him onto a skate, which Henrey begins to roll away. B.D. aks what he wants and after hearing of Foghorn’s lies explains that Foghorn is the chicken. Dog and rooster argue and Henrey sees this is going nowhere fast. He releases the dog who in turn pummels the rooster. Their tussle takes them into a stable where a real horse throws them out. They form a truce and go fight the equine. Henrey goes in and drags all three home with him. Figuring that at least one of them has to be a chicken.

Personal Rating: 4

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Henrey Hawk

Just like Beans before him, WB thought it would be this character that would become the star. First appearing in Chuck Jone’s “The Squaking Hawk” he was later used by Mckimson in the short “Walky Talky Hawky.” The short also starred a rooster who nobody expected to go anywhere beyond second banana. The short would actually go on to be nominated for the Acadamy award. It lost to “The Cat Concerto.” Dang Tom and Jerry! I love those guys and their shorts, but having the same plot constantly, doesn’t merit multiple awards!

This propelled the rooster (who was Foghorn,) to being the star. As for little Henrey? He stuck around, but he was never the main focus. He mostly appeared with Foghorn, but was also in Daffy’s “You never were Duckier” and “The Scarlet Pumpernickel“. (Although there, it was just a quick cameo.) And since I know a lot about animals, I will tell you: there is no such actual thing as a chicken hawk. The correct term is Red-tailed hawk. (Although I wouldn’t say no to “Buteo Jamaicencis“.

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Odor-able Kitty

“Come to my arms little pigeon. Do not be afraid of the love.”

Directed by Chuck Jones

A cat is staring longingly into a butcher shop. He is kicked away. A woman then hits him with her broom. (What was that for? I mean, yeah, I’d do the same thing to a cat.) He is also mauled by a bulldog. He sadly wishes he were a skunk. Nothing bothers those guys. So why not? Not only does he paint himself like one, but he is actually smart enough to rub Limburger, onions and garlic on himself. He goes around scaring his enemies and eating meat to his heart’s content.

Just when things are perfect and “syrene”, a real skunk appears. It’s Pepe’s first role! (His name is based on Pepe le Moko, a character played by Charles Boyer. His voice was what Mel used to base Pepe’s voice on.) He confuses the male cat for a female skunk and the chase begins. Formulaic? Yes. Boring? You insult me! The cat hides in a tree and is instantly found so he runs into town. Taking a stuffed skunk with him. (Okay, I’m pretty sure that people who wear furs, do not keep the whole body. I HOPE they don’t do that.) He hides on a silo and when Pepe comes, the cat (who I’m deciding to name Theodore) says that he will jump if Pepe comes closer. (I guess Theodore’s voice is feminine.)

He throws the decoy and tries to sneak away. Pepe only pretends to mourn and Theodore leaps into a dog’s arms in fright. He then leaps into Pepe’s arms. He hops back to the dog and the dog hops into Pepe’s arms before fainting. Pepe continues on his way and meets Bugs Bunny! Or rather Theodore in a disguise. (Pepe’s sharp.) Theodore runs and Pepe follows with his famous hops. Theodore is tired and passes out quickly. Pepe grabs his prize when he is tapped on his shoulder. It’s his REAL wife. Pepe is really Henry, (not the bear or hawk) and gets pounded by a rolling pin. Theodore sneaks away and washes away his disguise. He happily goes back to is old life of being abused.

Personal Rating: 3

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An Itch in Time

♪”Oh there’s food around the corner, food around the corner, food around the corner for me, (hallelujah brother.) food arund the corner, food around the corner, food around the corner for meee!”♪

Directed by Bob Clampett

Sorry for lack of update last week. (To the two people who visit this place, I was just on a family trip.)

Been awhile since we had a good old screwy Clampett short, eh? In Elmer’s home, Fudd is happily reading Looney Tunes comics. His dog (Willoughby) at his feet. (Or at least a very similar looking dog) Also in this house is a flea. (which some signs point out for us) His name is A. Flea. (A for amusing?) He’s excited because he’s found himself a feast of the grandest proportions: Dog Butt. He hurries over, makes sure the dog is asleep and goes to work. (Singing a song, that I DARE you to get out of your head.)

He gets some salt, ketchup, mustard and bread and puts it around some dog dermis. A bite causes the dog to yelp in pain and try to get the flea, but he only ends up biting himself. Elmer pours flea powder on him, (which A. treats as snow) and warns him that if he scratches once more, its a bath! The dog swears to not scratch. Which is near impossible with A. mining his meat. Elmer is keeping a close eye on him, and Willoughby turns different colors trying to stay strong. He kicks the cat (which A. didn’t want for some reason) who scratches for him. A glare from Elmer makes them both shrink into little masses.

A. sets off some explosives and the dog can’t take it anymore and he scoots around on the floor. (“Hey, I better cut this out. I may get to like it.”) Elmer comes to make good word of his promise, but A. moves onto him. (For the record: fleas rarely bite people, and I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t if there were two pets in the house.) Willoughby gleefully takes his master to the tub, and slips on a bar of soap landing them both in the water. A. puts them on a “blue plate special” and carries them off. (To eat I presume. If the cat wasn’t still there, I’d complain that parasites don’t try to kill their hosts as it destroys their home as well) Having seen all this, the Cat shoots himself.

This scene is of course censored today, because some people thought it’d be a bright idea to kill themselves. As such, everyone is too afraid to laugh at this. If you play it for laughs, (like here) it is FUNNY. I only care so much, because lets say you watch stuff like this all the time and make a suicide joke. Not aware that people’s sensibilities have changed, and now it makes you look like the evil one. Rant over.

Personal Rating: 4

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Rabbit Punch

“Hey, ya big palooka! Why don’tcha pick on somebody your own size?”

Directed by Charles M. Jones

Unlike “Bunny Hugged” which was about wrestling, this earlier short was about boxing. It’s the first appearance of the Crusher. (Although here he’s called “Battling Mcgook”) He is pounding his opponent with no effort whatsoever. However, watching from the edge of the stadium, (which was built outdoors, is that smart?) is Bugs, who objects to the cheers and demands “Mcgook” pick another fight.

The man chooses Bugs, and throws him into the ring. They both show off their muscles. Mcgook is so strong he has muscles on his muscles. Bugs has two tiny bumps for biceps. (For the record though, that’s way better than mine.) The champ punches Bugs around until Bugs gets one in by “fainting” his opponent. Next, the champ builds a brick wall around his fist and really knocks him one. Bugs grabs the microphone from the announcer and begins narrating his own idea of how the fight is going. Mcgook follows his lines exactly.

Later, they decide to wrestle (I guess) as they throw off their gloves. (Bugs was hiding horseshoes. Clever b*stard.) The champ… screw it, I’m calling him Crusher, easily puts him in a leghold. Bugs breaks a board and Crusher thinks he broke his leg. Bugs disguises himself as a doctor and wraps him up tight in bandages. During round 31, crusher pours grease in Bug’s resin. Bugs uses this to his advantage and skate/boxes. During round 48 Bugs gives Crusher some exploding popcorn. During round 73, he has Crusher hold a slingshot and fires something at his face. During round 98, (how long do these usually last?) Crusher and Bugs both launch themselves towards each other, in a cannon and bow respectively.

Finally, during round 110 Crusher has Bugs tied to railroad tracks and prepares to run a train over him. (He should wear that conductor outfit more.) Bugs seems to have run out of tricks as the train gets closer and closer and all he can do is sweat. Then the film breaks. Bugs comes out to apologize and (while holding scissors) mention that the film didn’t EXACTLY break.

Personal Rating: 3