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The Mouse that Jack Built

“I always feel better if I count my cheese before I go out for the evening.”

Our short begins with Jack Benny-mouse practicing his violin. He must be pretty bad as the cat waiting outside his mouse hole is wearing earmuffs. He decides to quit for the time being as he is taking Mary Livingston-mouse out for her birthday. After getting his suit back from Rochester-mouse, he has a bit of time on his paws to go count his cheese. Mary arrives soon afterwards. When asked where she wants to go, she suggests the “mousecumbo”. (Laugh. It’s a pun.) That’s too expensive for our “cheese-p-stake” Benny. (Don’t laugh. That was lower than a pun.)

The cat gets an idea and sends them a flyer advertising “The Kit-Kat Club.” It claims that entertainers are admitted free. That’s enough for Benny so he gets in his Mel Blanc car with Mary, and has Rochester follow the arrows that lead to their destination. Upon arrival, Jack is impressed that it looks just like a cat. It even rolls out the red carpet for them. Somehow the cat even got miniature tables, chairs, and exit signs in its mouth. Mary is disturbed but Benny only “cat-ches” on when the mouth closes. Cut to live action Jack Benny waking up. It was all a dream. He then sees two very familiar mice climbing out of the mouth of his sleeping cat…

Personal Rating: 3. It’s pretty cool that the actual cast of “The Jack Benny” show played their fursonas. (Err, poor choice of words.) However, if you don’t know anything about Mr. Benny (shaaaame) you’ll be confused.

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The Last Hungry Cat

“Sardines and milk wouldn’t have done it, you had to commit murder.”

Parody Time! It looks like “Hitchcock Presents”, but instead of a person its a bear. (I guess? It could just be a very strange hairdo.) He tells us a story. In this strory a one Sylvester the cat is about to break into Granny’s house and eat Tweety. Once grabbing him, he loses his balance on the stack of furniture he is standing on and everything collapses. Tweety uses this time to escape. Sylvester comes to and seeing the feather in his mouth deduces that he ate Tweety. Hearing Granny he makes his leave happy to have escaped.

The narrator works his nerves up by calling it murder. It doesn’t help when Sylvester walks by a newspaper hunting a criminal known as “The Cat.” He hides in a building. (I assume it’s his house.) He tries to relax by listening to the radio and reading but both things just add to his guilt. So he resorts to smoking and coffee drinking. (To calm his nerves I guess? I don’t think coffee does this, anyone care to explain?) He stays awake all night. While taking a sleeping pill shower he breaks down sobbing. The narrator tells him to give himself up and Sylvester agrees.

Upon arriving back at the scene of the crime he finds Tweety alive and well. His happiness soon turns to hunger, when Granny whacks him for trying to eat her bird. The narrator ends his tale and Sylvester throws a brick at him.

Personal Rating: 3

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The Honey-Mousers

“Whats wrong with mustard ice cream and kumquats?”

In our spoof of “The Honeymooners”, we find Ralph Kramden mouse surprising his wife, (Alice Kramden mouse) with their supper: a hunk of stale cheese. Alice, (who is probably a good contender for the hottest mouse ever award. It exists.) complains to Ralph how they need more food. Ralph would like to comply, but no one has moved into the place. (People = pestilence.)

Perfect timing. Ed Norton mouse comes in to tell that their prayers have been answered. So happy is everyone, that no one notices a cat has been brought as well. No one notices until Ralph and Ed both get mauled. Ralph’s can disguise is useless, so they set to work constructing a Trojan dog that Ed, Ralph and Ralph’s chameleon sweater will take to the fridge. They exit via a missing grate in the wall, (Good thing the cat was gone at the time.) and set to work loading up with goodies. Unbeknowest to them, the cat reappears and enters the dog. They notice once inside and in the ensuing chase, they lose all the food.

Alice suggests that they just get rid of the cat. Ralph tells her to put her money where he mouth is and do it. Alice tears off a whisker and yells at the cat who leaves. Angry with how lucky she was, Ralph assures her he still loves her.

Personal Rating: 3

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Wideo Wabbit

“About time television discovered my talents.”

Bugs is having a relaxing day when he sees an interesting ad in the paper. A TV studio is looking for a rabbit and luckily for Bugs, he is just what they were looking for. They sit him on a stepladder (that unbeknownst to Bugs has a 10,000 volt charge in it,) telling him that unlike the others in showbiz, he starts out on top.

Secretly, a hole is opened above him. We see that the show Bugs is on is “The Sportsman Hour!” With our special host, Mr. Elmer Fudd! YAAAAAAAY! He tells us that he is going to demonstrate how to catch a wabbit. He gives the signal and the volts shock Bugs up on stage. Angry about being shot at, Bugs runs with Elmer in hot pursuit. Elmer chases him into another studio where Groucho (Bugs) is the host of our favorite game show: “You Beat Your Wife.” He asks Elmer whether or not he has stopped beating his wife. Trapped, Elmer muddles it over while Marx makes his exit. Noticing the tail, he gives chase once again.

The next hiding spot is in Studio T, “Liverace.” Bugs is playing Hungarian Rhapsody 2 and notices Elmer. He identifies him as his brother George, and asks him to take a candelabra to their mother. Elmer realizes they’re fire crackers pretty quickly, but can’t stop the inevitable. Eventually Bugs, (in another disguise) tells Elmer they’ve been waiting for him. He forces him to put a costume on and to sit atop a stepladder. Bugs now playing the hunter, gives the signal to shock Fudd into jumping up. Now wearing a rabbit suit, and receiving bullets rather than applause.

Personal Rating: 3

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Swooner Crooner

“G-G-Gee Wiz! That’s swell fellas!”

Its the middle of WWII. Doing his part, Porky has all the hens who work at Flockheed Factory laying eggs for soldiers. They get in nests and powerhouse their way through the place, before laying an egg in a private area. (And don’t worry if you can’t lay any, Porky will force you to)

Work will be the last thing on the hen’s minds when a Sinatra Rooster is outside. They leave to swoon and reenact scenes that also appear in the animated part of “Two guys form Texas.” Porky needs those chickens back, but they’ve been seduced so much that only a crooner of equal or better value could lure them back.

Porky holds auditions and rejects the poultry versions of Nelson Eddy, Al Jolson, Jimmy Durante, and Cab Calloway. He finds his man (er bird) in the form of a one Bing Crosby rooster. His singing has the hens “flocking” to him and subsequently laying eggs again. Frankie can’t have that and a battle of the singers ensues. Much later Porky is admiring the mountains of eggs he now has. He wants to know their secret. They start singing and (in a scene I could see as the ending to a “Twilight Zone” episode) Porky begins to lay eggs too.

Personal Rating: 4

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Goofy Groceries

“Gosh, ain’t I repulsive?”

It is winter. (In the short. As I type this, it’s fall.) In the grocery store, the logos of various products come to life. (What a clever idea! Someone should NEVER make a movie based on this concept.)The cow on the contented milk can sings to a case of ‘fullabull’ tobacco. A crab hates the singing, (He has a turtle shell. Why does he have a turtle shell?) and a chicken pie clucks.

A dog gets off of some ‘barker’ dog food to become a barker himself. He tells of a dance provided  by a stick of wiggly gum, and we see a pool of water from a case of ‘u know’ biscuits that some sardines do a water ballet in. (If they didn’t come out of a labeled can, I’d have no idea what they were supposed to be.) Our festivities continue with a tomato soup cancan line. Meanwhile, up on the top shelf, a gorilla breaks out of a box of animal crackers. As we all know, gorillas will attempt to nab any female that is even remotely attractive to them. There are plenty of dames to choose from and he comes down to look.

Seeing the danger, Jack Bunny rides a bottle of horse-radish to confront the ape. He is joined by navy beans, turtle soup tanks, and ginger bread men who use tissues as parachutes. The ape fights back with fireworks. He soon has Bunny cornered. Superguy (of the soap-chips) tries to stop him but is petrified with fear. Can anything stop him? His mother’s call can. Spoofing “The Aldritch Family” he runs home to her. Bunny is so relieved that the ape is gone that he doesn’t realize he still has a lit firecracker until its too late. BOOM!

Personal Rating: 3

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Thugs with Dirty Mugs

“I’ll get the killer yet! I’ll send him up!… The rat!”

It’s a cartoon spoof of “Angels with Dirty Faces” and the character Killer Diller is played by Ed. G. Robemsome. He robs the first national bank. Then the second one. Then the third one. This goes on until 13. Seems the killer is superstitious. But that doesn’t stop him, as he goes on to rob 87 banks in one day. The secret agent fails to inform the chief of police of what he’s learned while Killer makes his way up to robbing the 112th national bank.

He goes to the worst national bank (although, I swear he already went there earlier) which contains 225 million assets. The gang goes in and comes out leaving only 2. Killer goes back to get what he missed and fixes the sign for them. That was nice. He is so intimidating that he can rob the operator over the telephone. Back at the hideout he tells his boys that they are next going to rob Mrs. Lotta Jewels house. A man in the audience tries to leave, but Killer makes him sit. Can’t risk him telling the cops.

The police chief meanwhile figures that if he knew where Killer would strike next, he could catch him. The same audience member tips him off, and the popo surprise the gang at the mansion. Killer is sent to jail for his long sentence. Well, it’s not very long (it’s only “I’ve been a naughty boy”) but he’ll be writing it for years to come.

Personal Rating: 4

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Speaking of the Weather

“Is everybody happy?”

Around midnight, the magazines in a shop come to life. The radio star plays music before “Radioland” takes over. A beaver from “Outdoor Life” slaps a bass, and “The Dance” starts having a good time. Two boxers dance in “The Ring” and “Child’s Life” applauds. Hugh Herbert enjoys himself too. (Behind him, is a note stating that he was in Coo-Coo Nut Grove. Nice continuity.) Leopold Stickoutski conducts the storm and our title song begins, being joined by some singing tongue sandwiches and lobster/oyster castanets.

Gang magazine robs “Wall Street” but soon confesses to “Confessions”. He is sentenced to Life magazine. He goes to the other magazine nearby (Liberty) and breaks free. Walter Snicthall (Twitchell) alerts everyone, and now everyone is on the alert. The Thin Man and his Dog(world) find him hiding in “Better Babies” and he runs. He is lassoed by “Western Story”, trips over Greta Garbo’s feet and lands in “Twenty thousand years in Sing-Sing”. Hugh laughs at this and the crook drops a globe on him. He then laughs in the same manner Hugh did.

Personal Rating: 2

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The Film Fan

“A L-loaf of bread, a bottle of milk, and come home right away.”

It’s the grand opening of a theater! Their feature film is the broken leg. (It has a large cast. *Rimshot*) To celebrate this occasion, kids are admitted free! (To add to the greatness, the theater advertises Looney Tunes and “The Ahs of a Wizard” That’s a good contender for the best pun I’ve ever heard.)

Porky is a child in this short, and he is on an errand for his mother. He can’t control himself when he learns of the free admission, and rushes in. A newsreel tells us that short tempered doctors tend to lose patients, and we see a powerful microscope, (courtesy of Prof. Widebottom) which shows bacteria happily playing in the bloodstream. Porky, meanwhile can’t see the screen where he is and rushes up to the front, where the view is stretched out.

A feature starring the masked marvel shows the titular hero and his horse splitting up to take different paths. A duck in the audience shoots his gum at the horse, much to the equines annoyance. The theater gets a phone call, and an employee announces that a little boy who was sent on an errand run is wanted at home by his mother. Upon hearing this, the whole audience leaves.

Personal Rating: 3

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She was an Acrobat’s Daughter

“Why Daddy? Why did the man look at her like that, Daddy? Why Daddy? Did he like her Daddy? Did he like the lady?”

At the theater there are 15 acts. The audience keeps switching seats as soon as one is available and things start with a newsreel. Dole Promise tells us that the U.S. has built an ocean liner so long it barely has to move to reach across the Atlantic. The audience meanwhile, is annoyed by that one theater-goer who moves through the aisles and is fat. In this case he is an actual hippo.

Next the news tells us of a town, whose inhabitants all act like dogs. The hippo comes back just in time for the shorts namesake singalong! After the song, the feature presentation plays. (After the MGM lion crows like a rooster.) It is “The Petrified Florist”. During the show, a Donkey tries to sell some munchies to the patrons and is thrown out. The main character of the onscreen film tries to regale some poetry to a waitress but muddles it up.

Another typical theater goer we all know, (the kid who won’t shut up) is a duckling constantly asking his father numerous questions. The other patrons growl at him, and hit his father who tries to defend him. The youngster runs from his angry smacking father and comes across the projection room. He begins to play with the machine, speeding the film up and reversing it. He panics and tries to fix his mistake only to get pulled into the machine and tangled in the film.

Personal Rating: 3