Category: Sylvester

A cat who just can’t take a break. But when you were designed to look like a clown, why would the universe take you seriously?

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Tweety’s High-flying Adventure

“Humph! Mr. Popular.”

Directed by Karl Torege, Charles Visser, James T. Walker, Kyung Won Lim.

In case you haven’t noticed, all of the shorts I’ve talked about recently have had cats in them. Looney Tunes are chock full of them. And so is this direct to video movie which was sort of a series finale for “The Sylvester and Tweety Msyteries.” It’s not spectacular, but I still find it enjoyable. So let’s get started.

It’s October 2nd… I dunno, 2000 I guess, and Granny is living in London for some reason. She has two pets, namely Sylvester and Tweety. She is also a member of the Looney Club, which is located right next door to a children’s park that is going to close soon. Inside the club we see…COLONEL RIMFIRE? Wow! One of the last characters created for Looney Tunes. He doesn’t get roles anymore. Score one point for this film. He is busy ranting about the fact that he never caught his nemesis: Cool Cat. No, not that abomination created by Derek Savage. This character actually has earned his title. At least, I think he’s cool.

The colonel takes a little solace in the fact that he was bested by a creature that was smarter than him. Not just Cool Cat, but all cats. He believes cats are the smartest creatures on the planet. I disagree. Lucky for me, Granny is on my side, believing her canary to be the I.Q.-iest. Rimfire says he’d bet his savings on his claim, and she takes him up on it, hoping to use the winnings to restore the park. She claims that Tweety can prove this by not only going around the globe in 80 days, which would be December 21, (I’m still going with) 2000, but also collect 80 different paw prints. It’s a big challenge, but Tweety’ll do anything for Granny. (Is it just me, or does that calendar have a picture of one of the hunters from “Horton hatches the egg” on it?)

So he is given a passport to get stamped to prove he visited the locations. This gathers the attention of a shifty looking character in the crowd. It’s the Shropshire Slasher from the short “Deduce You Say“. He eyes Tweety’s passport with great interest and why not? The things might be rare soon. One’s already been stolen apparently. Sylvester meanwhile, plans on following the canary to make sure he and only he can have him for lunch. Outfitted with a tracking device, Tweety heads for his first stop in France. Not too long after starting, a wind blows him off course into the Alps. Lodged into the side of a mountain, he asks a nearby climber for help. Said climber is actually Daffy, who is sore about the fact this is not his movie and refuses to help. An avalanche happens but the two are saved by snowboarder Bugs Bunny.

It is now October 12, and Sylvester has been waiting in France this whole time. The script says that Tweety should have come here, could it be wrong? Nope. Here he comes now, being chased by Penelope Pussycat. She crashes into Sylvester’s table and gets a white stripe down her back, but that does not deter her from her purrrr-suit. (Weak, I know.) Not if Sylvester has anything to say about it. While they chase, Tweety gets his passport stamped by Pepe. He then points out something he thinks he’ll like: two skunks fighting over him. (It’s not really explained how Sylvester got a stripe as well.) With those two occupied, Tweety collects Penelope’s print and flies off for Italy.

Would you like to bet on whether or not Tweety will make it? Because his progress is being charted by Foghorn, Prissy, Henry, and Egghead Jr. And they’re accepting all bets. They believe he can do it. (Birds are encouraging like that) In Venice, Tweety stops at Pasquelles. This is the same restaurant Charlie Dog tried to make home in “A Hound for Trouble.” He’s still there, playing waiter. Tweety orders a plate of birdseed with marinara sauce. As all Americans know, Italian food is good eating, so it’s no wonder that Tweety leaves the place plump as a turkey. He can’t even fly anymore, so he hitches a ride on a gondola. But flightless, plump, juicy, succulent birds are vulnerable. Surprise! The owner of it is a cat, and there are more up ahead on a bridge. Tweety uses his new physique to bowl over them. He gets their prints, and a stamp for Venice. (Turns out his fat was just gas. If only I had that problem.)

Tweety’s trip has garnered more attention, and he is even mentioned by Lola on the news. Tweety makes it to Egypt and gets his passport stamped by a camel. (Who I think is Humpty Bumpty in a fez, but I can’t be sure.) Worn out, Tweety goes to sleep. But Sylvester must have gotten away form Pepe, and is back for more. (Please tell me he convinced him of his gender before it was too late.) After a scuffle, Tweety hides in the Sphinx. Granny wasn’t kidding about his smarts. He knows how to read Hieroglyphics. Turns out the place has a terrible fate for anyone who tries to head down a certain hall. Since Sylvester isn’t aware, he gets attacked by mummified cats.  They punch him hard enough to make a hole in the place for Tweety to escape from. He collects their prints and is on his way once more.

Landing in Africa (in the jungle of crayon drawn trees) he encounters the Mynah Bird. Since that guy doesn’t talk, Tweety just follows him hoping he’ll lead him to his next stamp. But he doesn’t look where he’s going and wanders into a lion’s mouth. (At least he found the stamp in there.) He leaves the mouth of the beast, (which looks more like a dog dressed as a lion to me) but almost immediately runs into Pete Puma. (Why’s he here?) The two corner Tweety in a tree. (No relation to the short “Tree cornered Tweety”) Luckily for him, the Mynah comes back and saves him by flinging the predators away. With that done, Tweety heads to Tibet. He gets to a souvenir shop where Gossamar gives him another stamp. (Why not?) Tweety also catches sight of some monk cats lead by Claude. (He may look different, but the voice is a dead giveaway.)

They are about to sacrifice a canary (who has hair) to their god. Tweety comes to the rescue in a snowball (picking up Hugo the abominable snowman along the way) and bowls over them. He looks just like their god and he demands that they release the bird, and knock off the canary sacrifices. Even though they agree, Tweety is a jerk and still sics Hugo on them. (But he does get their prints as well) He is joined by the other bird named Aooga. (No really.) After getting a stamp at China, the two are blown off course all the way to Mexico. At least they can get a stamp for there. (Courtesy of Speedy) Since they are down there, they stop by Rio as well. Rocky and Muggsy are hiding out there, but they still give them a stamp. And in Argentina they get another one form (Spike/Hector? Marc Antony? Just a bulldog?)

With the south taken care of, they fly back to Japan. (Seems the Slasher is still on the loose.) Afterwards, they decide to take a boat to their next destination. Sylvester has remembered he’s in this movie and prepares to dig in. But he’s caught by a ship hand and thrown in the galley to catch mice. The mice in question are Hubie and Bertie who are living a good life with all the cheese they can eat. Sylvester gives chase, but they use a bucket of soapy water to send him sliding off the ship. Even though he clasps on to the side, Tweety sadistically pries him off, sending him into the shark infested (badly animated) water below. But he does throw him a life saver. (The things he does for Warner Bros.)

The three drift to Australia. There, the passport is stamped by Hippety Hopper. (Why does he have a pouch?) And of course Sylvester thinks he’s a giant mouse. But this is also the home of the Tasmanian Devil who shows up and plans to eat some cat. Sylvester saves his hide, by encouraging a team up so they can both get canary. They chase after the birds on a bike, (Taz really seems to be enjoying himself) but the birds make their getaway with a convenient hang glider. Sylvester leaps onto it, leaving Taz alone in the air. (He holds out Wile E. holding out a ‘mother’ sign.) The birds fly off leaving the cat stuck on the glider, but he bumps into a wind surfer. (Is that the flying fish from “The sour puss” on his sail?) The birds land atop it as well, and ride to their next stop, San Francisco.

With the putty tat still on their tails, the birds ride a skateboard through no-color-ville to escape. Sylvester hops aboard a trolley driven by Yosemite Sam and shoves him out of the way. But he doesn’t really know how to work it, and ends up breaking the brake. With the vehicle out of control the two end up on Alcatraz much to Sam’s anger. The birds head off to Vegas, with Sylvester following on a train, an angry Sam chasing him the whole trip. (He has great endurance.) Once there, Sylvester manages to get Sam taken away on another train, but loses the birds in Chalk Vegas. They are hiding in a casino which just so happens to be full of cats. They are all betting against Tweety. If they were to be spotted, they would probably be chased down. Sylvester exposes their hiding spot and they are chased down. One cat catches Aoogah and I think Tweety shoves a pole up his butt. (What else could he have done with it?) Sylvester meanwhile has caused another cat to hit the jackpot. Pussyfoot is with her, are they related? Also the kitten makes itself comfortable on Sylvester’s head. (Adorable)

The two head off again. (The Slasher also is outside. Is that other guy naked?) The two birds head off across the country collecting prints along the way. They eventually make it to New York. (It’s full of Looney Tune advertisements.) They stop for a hot dog at a cart that is by a strange looking man in a trench coat. Tweety asks a weird question to Aoogah: What kind of hot dog would she be if she was one? (What.) Sylvester is the vendor, and plans to eat. During the scuffle, mustard is squirted all over the strange man, exposing him as Marvin. This confusion gives the birds a chance to get to the airport. Tweety is sad that the fun is almost over, and decides for one more challenge he’ll fly back to London on his own. He leaves his ticket with the stewardess and the birds head out. Sylvester meanwhile makes a pretty poor excuse for a poster that is framing Tweety as stealing the Passport. Good thing he showed it to a poor excuse for a cop who believes it. While this does not get him anywhere, he does get Tweety’s ticket. Guess he’ll meet them in London.

The birds meanwhile have flown into a hurricane. Not only does it remove Tweety’s tracker, making the world believe he’s gone, but it separates the duo. (Now all the world has left to enjoy is a man in a barrel. I’m not joking)  And Aooga had the passport! Tweety feels sorry for himself, since it seems like he’s not going to win like he always does. He hears Aooga’s call and lands on an island in the eye of the storm. (Home of the worst CGI trees I’ve ever seen.) Turns out the passport floats and after getting swarmed by some random cats, (Strange, but hey more prints.) They fly off to London once more. Arriving in a pub, they are grabbed by the Slasher. Turns out he was behind the passport theft all along! (Surprise surprise!) He collects the things. He stuffs it in his pocket, and Tweety probably would have been lost if he was alone. But Aoogah snatches it back.

The pollice arrive and the Slahser is forced to take off. Sylvester is with them, still clutching his poster. (I’m not surprised these guys believed it. They probably think all American posters are shoddily made.) Tweety has the passport and is presumed guilty. Sylvester takes it as Tweety is arrested and happily jumps in glee. But what’s this? There are two passports? And Tweety’s checks out. Leaving Sylvester holding the stolen one. Turns out the slasher stuck them in the same pocket he keeps his fish and chips in, and they got stuck together. (Gross.) Sylvester won’t be a bother to them now, but Tweety is sad. According to the subtitle, it’s the 22 and that mean he’s late. But Aoogah points out that they crossed a time zone and actually it is the 21st! There is stilla a chance! (Ummm. The sun rises in the east. So if it’s really the 21st in London, wouldn’t it be the 20th in America?)

They rush to the club. Rimfire points out that there’s only 79 prints. Tweety never managed to actually get Sylvester’s. Taking the passport back, he rushes to the police wagon and gets the last print! Rimfire reluctantly admits defeat, and it turns out one of the other members was Cool Cat all along. And he knew Tweety would succeed. Only someone who is truly cool will admit he’s not the smartest. For finding the missing passport, Tweety is knighted. Sylvester is still heading to prison.

Personal Rating: Looney-tics should have fun seeing how many characters are crammed in here. For them, 3. For the rest…3. (Only because I don’t have a 3.5 rating)

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Mouse and Garden

“We’re pals, aren’t we Sylvester?”

The best of chumps.

Directed by Friz Freleng. Released in 1960 Nominated for an Academy Award. Lost to the Noveltoon, “Munro”. Which was really good, so I’ll allow it.

Life is hard for Sylvester. If he’s not being anyone’s pet, he doesn’t get any food and is reduced to picking through the trash. At least he’s got a friend. Sam, (voiced by Daws Butler, the same person who voiced many of Hanna-Barbera’s characters, like Yogi Bear, Huckleberry Hound, and Quick Draw) who previously appeared with him in the short “Trick or Tweet” The two are the best of chums. And they’re always willing to share the other’s food. Sylvester takes note of a mouse. It’s small, but it’s got more nutrition than fish bones. Seeing his chance, he ditches Sam and chases the rodent into a boathouse. Unlike most mice in Looney Tunes, this one is not a clever trickster and Sylvester stops it by stepping on its tail.

Sam comes in and Sylvester hides his snack behind a pillar. Somehow, Sam knows about this and hammers Sylvester’s foot and replaces the mouse with a lit firecracker, which Sylvester eats. Sam hides the mouse in a bureau and when Sylvester asks what’s in it, Sam claims it’s nothing. Sylvester pokes his head in and comments that he’s right. Sam finds the mouse in his friend’s mouth. Now that they both know the other is aware, they decide to put the mouse in a jug  that they dangle from a rope, promising to share it in the morning. (Hope they don’t mind if he dies, there can’t be an air supply there.) The two sleep on a bed that’s there and Sam dreams of a mouse feast. (Sylvester dreams of hitting Sam for dreaming of said mouse.)

Sam attempts to get the mouse but is caught in the act. Since he can’t be trusted, Sam is tied to the bed. Sylvester attempts, but Sam mallets his head. (All while still tied to the bed.) Sam tries to reach the jug from the water below, using a pipe as a snorkel. Sylvester puts another firecracker down it. (Is he walking on water?) Sam spits it back up a few times, before Sylvester plugs it up. To finally stop this whole thing, the two agree to be tied together. But later, Sylvester ties more string on the line so he can get the mouse without Sam waking up. He ties Sam’s end to a motorboat, but Sam wakes up and catches him. He ties Sylvester’s tail to the boat and exposes him.

Unaware that he’s now the one tied up, Sylvester announces his plans to have Sam be taken away. Sam points out that he switched the lines and shakes Sylvester’s hand/paw in farewell. The boat takes off with Sylvester, Sam, and the jug all being taken along. They crash and the two cats make it to an offshore rock. As the mouse (somehow escaped) floats back to land in the jug, the two cats continuously kick each other as we iris out.

Personal Rating: 3

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The Unexpected Pest

“Okay sthlave, I’ve got a job for ya.”

Directed by Robert McKimson. Released in 1956.

Before we begin, a brief mention of the symphony I attended last week: IT WAS GREAT! I got to talk to a lot of Looney Tunes fans. I complimented a man’s tie, a woman complimented my shirt, and I got a picture of me posing next to Bugs in a scene from “Rabbit of Seville.” They played the corresponding music to several shorts. (Including a few Tom and Jerry ones.) The short’s you’d expect were there: “Baton Bunny,” “Long-haired Hare,” and obviously: “What’s Opera, Doc?” All in all, it was spectacular. Here’s hoping everyone had a merry Christmas. (I did.)

A man comes home but is disgusted by the cat who lives there. (Sylvester) The feeling’s mutual however, as Sylvester hides behind a pillow when he looks at the man’s face. (Best joke of the short right there.) The man complains to his wife,(June Foray in one of her first roles at Warners.) but she reminds him that they got the cat to catch mice. Which he apparently did. (It’s nice to not have him fail for once.) Since there are no more mice, she agrees to get rid of the cat tomorrow.

Sylvester has heard the whole thing and is not willing to part with his home. Luckily for him, there is a mouse right outside, who faints at the sight of the cat. (And this mouse shall be named: Dennis.) Sylvester brings him to with some cheese, and the mouse thinks he died and went to heaven. When he sees the cat still behind him, he figures it’s the other place. Sylvester lays down the rules: the mouse does what he commands, or it’s down the hatch. He has the mouse go in and scare the woman of the house. (Did any woman really ever jump on a stool at the sight of a mouse? I figure they’d beat it to death with a broom first.) Sylvester comes to the rescue and pounds the rodent. The wife tells her husband the cat is staying. If there is one mouse, there must be more about. (Poor Dennis probably IS a father.)

The charade goes on for a few weeks, until one day when Sylvester gets his pet, Dennis talks back. He’s been thinking, and realizes that Sylvester is not going to eat him; he’s far too valuable. In fact, he can do as crazy stuff as can be as he wants. Jumping off of high places, grabbing mousetraps, and standing under anvils, knowing the cat will save him each time. His antics go too far when he sits on a lit firecracker. Sylvester throws it out of the room, where it explodes on the man. Cut to Sylvester battered and bruised. (Holy crap! That guy actually beat a cat up? I hate the things, but that’s flucking evil! I hope for his sake that Dennis’s family isn’t there, or your wife will have his head.)

Speaking of that mouse, he waves to Sylvester from a bridge and jumps. He pretends to drown much to the puttytat’s delight. As he goes on his merry way, Dennis tells us he figures after all that hell, he deserved a happy ending.

Personal Rating: 3

See you next year!

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The Wild Chase

“Vamanos! Vamanos! Yee-haa!”

Directed by Friz Freleng. Released in 1965.

My four shadows are gone! Do you get it yet? I said in a few posts back, that I wondered who would win in a race between Speedy and the Roadrunner. Foreshadowing! Seems I’m too subtle for my own good. Well, we might as well carry on anyway.

A race is being held for the honor of Mexico and Texas. (Oh. Okay. I always pictured the Roadrunner shorts taking place in Arizona or New Mexico, myself. And I like the idea of the new trying to outdo the classic.) The fastest mouse in… well probably the whole world, Speedy, vs that literal road burning bird, the Roadrunner. Both entrants are being watched by hungry eyes. One Wile E. Coyote, (who is for a first, NOT being directed by Chuck Jones) and Sylvester. And this is his last starring role. He’d reappear as a cameo one year later, but that was it.

The race starts and the bird takes the lead. The coyote follows and the ” resulting smoke hides the fact that there’s no more road” gag from “Zoom and Bored” is reused. Sylvester chases his prey of choice but has to stop at the same cliff. (I guess Speedy jumped.) The Roadrunner for whatever reason, went backwards and surprises the cat to jump off and land on the struggling coyote. Both predators try launching boulders at the prey, but they collide in midair and land on their respective launchers. Wile E. tries the “putting iron pellets in birdseed gag” that he used in the short “Wild about Hurry”, with Sylvester laying cheese as bait. The racers stop for a snack. (Should I stop pointing out every time there’s a color goof? ‘Cause Speedy’s nose turns tan.)

Wile E. sets a grenade tied to a roller skate with a magnet on it to go toward the two. It breaks in two just as he checks to see how it’s going. They try pushing a rock on the two, but it won’t fall until both are jumping on it, and when trying to set up a TNT plunger, it blows up before they get it set up. They decide to catch their prey by riding in a rocket car. They catch up, but the racers veer away from a tunnel that the car enters. It leads to empty air, but the car is going so fast, that they don’t plummet. Instead they pass the combatants and end up winning the race themselves. Then the car blows up.

Amusing short, but I feel like this story was done better in an issue of Looney Tunes DC Comics. Where the racers tie… for second place. Cecil turtle won first. (Great joke and twist.)

Personal Rating: For the crossover alone, it earns a 3. But it’s real close to being a 2, due to the repeating gags and cheaper animation.

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Nuts and Volts

“Sorry Senor pussycat, I can’t play with you no more.”

Directed by Friz Freleng. (Interesting note, this is the last of the golden era Looney Tunes to give him director credit.) Released in 1964.

During one of their many chases, (in which Speedy is laughing a little TOO hard. Is it that fun?) Sylvester gets tired. (At least all that exercise is good for him.) He decides to try using technology to catch the mouse. (Why not? It’s the 60’s. Time to upgrade.) He sets up an electric eye that will sound an alarm as soon as Speedy exits his hole. Sylvester will then be launched towards him. (He crashes into the wall.)

He builds a mouse disposal robot. Working the controls with a sonic viewer, he spots the mouse and sends out his droid. Speedy is still much faster, so Sylvester turns up the robot’s speed as high as it will go. It crashes into the wall like he did. Round 2. Whatever that viewer is connected to, Speedy is able to look through and see the cat. The robot is sent after him but Speedy leads him into the viewers screen which somehow ends up hitting Sylvester as well. (Toon logic may be less logical than ours, but it’s more fun.)

Third time’s the charm right? Sylvester warns the bot it is down to its last chance and unwinds its arm to place some dynamite in Speedy’s mouse hole. Speedy keeps moving back, and Sylvester somehow knows to keep the arm going. Speedy leads the arm back behind the cat who can’t escape even by hiding in the robot. He tosses the thing out and grabs a club. (Ah the caveman approach. Very nice.) Speedy in turn, has gotten into technology himself, and sends a robot dog after the cat.

Personal Rating: 3

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A Message to Gracias

“To cousin Speedy, everyway is the shorts-cut.”

Directed by Robert Mckimson. Released in 1964

This short has a most fitting title. Unlike a majority of shorts, this one does not get it’s name from some form of wordplay or song title, but rather it flat out tells what the short will be about.

It begins at the H.Q. of a mouse named El Supremo. I don’t really know what kind of power that entails, but he’s fat so we can assume he’s a tyrant. He needs a message delivered to his friend, General Gracias. (Interesting name) He sends out a mouse named Manuel who is denied the privilege of finishing his will. The runs out into the cruel, hungry world, and while the other mice think he will make it, we know full well that he is going to be food. The mice mark another one down.

As El ponders how to get this message through, one of his mice suggests Speedy. Supremo agrees that it’s a good idea and is glad he thought of it. I’m not a fan when characters do that. Better add him to my list of annoying people I want to hurt. (…Fools who say Disney and Nintendo are only for kids, A-holes who kill animals but don’t eat them, The cast of “The tenth kingdom”…) They send a message and Speedy arrives. El gives him his orders of how he must cross a desert, climb over mountains, and cut through a jungle to get to Alcapulco. Which probably means if you’re bored enough, you can figure out where this errand is starting. Then you can challenge yourself to traverse the same route. Speedy runs over the waiting Sylvester, leaving behind some flames, and runs along the road making it bend much like the Roadrunner does. (I wonder which of those two would win a race. And on that note, why do I suddenly have four shadows?)

Sylvester is smart enough to chase him in a car, but Speedy stops for lunch break and Sylvester crashes. Next, they’re in the jungle. (Either nothing interesting happened in the mountains, or Speedy ran around them.) Sylvester takes aim from a boat in the river, but hits his head on a branch and shoots the boat instead. He ends up running from Caimans. He sets up a snare trap and catches a…I’ll be honest; I have no idea what that is. It looks kind of like Sam Sheepdog, the Tasmanian Devil, some green paint and some periods were all thrown in a blender. Maybe it’s just a radioactive jaguar?

Sylvester is eventually able to lasso Speedy, but the mouse drags him into a tree and ties him up. Speedy delivers the message which turns out to be a simple birthday poem. What’s more, it looks like Supremo only needed someone to distract the cat so he could come over with cake. Speedy is rightfully annoyed and lets Sylvester go. The cat chases the two bass turds into the distance. Speedy makes no effort to hide the fact that they will soon be eaten. (Can’t be good for the heart.)

Personal Rating: 3

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Chili Weather

“All these foods and not a crumb to eat.”

Directed by Friz Freleng. Released in 1963.

There’s a food plant, and where there’s edible goods, you’re bound to attract mice. Good thing whoever owns the place has Sylvester on guard duty. Speedy almost immediately comes by and offers to help the mice get some grub. He actually manages to run in and out the first time, without Sylvester noticing. When he does become aware, he chases the mouse onto one of the conveyor belts. While Speedy compliments how much easier it is running this way, (and barely misses being chopped up) Sylvester is chopped up.

Speedy greases the floor and Sylvester slips into a vat of tobasco sauce. Sitting on ice cools him down somehow. (He’s not even licking it, not that it would help, but was the sauce being cooked? It didn’t look heated.) While Speedy looks at some soda bottles, (I don’t know what’s in there, but they say “es bueno” on the side. That’s good enough for me! *takes*) Sylvester comes back and actually grabs him. (2 posts in a row? New record!) But the bottle cap machine caps him and blinds him, simultaneously. (He must be really small.)

He manages to get it off with a bottle opener, but Speedy surprises him and he jumps back up into it. Speedy’s inner troll emerges and he takes it away. Sylvester blindly swings a bat around and doesn’t notice he’s running into the dehydrator. (It appears to belong to a someone named Gomez. Or maybe that’s the machine’s name?) He shrinks and is now able to get the cap off. Seeing Speedy, he runs off in fear. (After years of chasing Hippety Hopper, he’s finally found a real giant mouse.)

Personal Rating: 3

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Mexican Boarders

“When do we eat? I’m hungry.”

Directed by Friz Freleng. Released in 1962.

In this short Sylvester chases Speedy through the house of J. C. Mendelez. (Him again?)  Naturally, Speedy is too fast to catch, and Sylvester wears himself out just by climbing the stairs. There is a knock at the door. Why, it’s none other than Slowpoke Rodriguez! Haven’t seen him since “Mexicali Shmoes.” (If you translate his song, you find out he’s singing about a cockroach who lacks marijuana. Don’t you dare say he’s an evil stereotype. From what I hear, he’s very popular in Latin America.)

Turns out he’s Speedy’s cousin and the cat gleefully lets him in. Slowpoke lives up to his name and plods in. (I like his hat. It changes color with every step he takes.) Speedy grabs him in the nick of time and brings him back to his hole. Slowpoke wants food. (Also, he’s not voiced by Mel. It’s a man named Tom Holland. Who I’m 96% sure is not the same Tom Holland who directed “Childs Play.”) Speedy offers to get it as he is the faster of the two. He brings back some sustenance. He forgot the tobasco sauce though, and races back. While he’s getting the sauce, Sylvester puts some glue on the ground. Speedy comes back, and Sylvester’s trap actually works. He grabs the mouse, but really should have removed the sauce as it gets poured down his throat.

Slowpoke has enjoyed the food, and wonders about dessert. Sylvester has set up a net which Speedy rushes through. When the cat tries it, he is cubed. That night, Slowpoke is hungry again. I don’t know if he’s trying to let Speedy rest or if Speedy is refusing to go out, but Slowpoke decides to head out himself. Speedy tells him not to, but Slowpoke is fine admitting that he is slow. (Not that way. I meant speed wise.) Still, he is not helpless. (Remember his gun?) Sylvester grabs him but Slowpoke has a different tactic this time. (Perhaps Peta told him to stop shooting cats?)

Making a face that I will undoubtedly see in my nightmares, he hypnotizes the feline. (Unlike in the Pokemon games, this Slowpoke can learn hypnosis. Come to think of it, don’t girls have this power too?) Now under mouse control, Sylvester is forced to fan the mice as they have another feast.

Personal Rating: 4

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The Pied Piper of Guadalupe

“Don’t go Armando! No! Don’t go!”

Directed by Friz Freleng. Released in 1961

Another Academy nominee? Speedy sure got a few of those didn’t he? So what did it lose to? (*Google search*) “Ersatz”? That’s a darn, fine film to lose to.

Sylvester it seems, has really lost his touch. He can’t catch any mice. They’re fast and they carry demeaning signs and smack him with planks. Thinking in front of a book sale, (One of which is apparently written by story man Warren Foster. Which makes perfect sense.) he spies a copy of the Pied Piper. Surely, the same thing would work on mice as well as rats. After taking some lessons from the J.C. Mendelez, he gets dressed up to play the part and begins to play his flute. The mice laugh at his attempts, but soon stop when it works. They can’t help but dance over to him, where he knocks them out and places them in his jug. Even tying their tails to a stake can’t hold them back and soon they’re all captured. Save one.

Speedy is still there. (Did he not hear the music?) He asks for the gato to release his friends, or Speedy will just have to rescue them. Underestimating him again, (Sylvester! You have to stop doing that.) he opens the jug and Speedy makes good of his word. Sylvester plays the flute and Speedy dances over only to smack him with a mallet. Why is Speedy immune? It’s not fair or good story writing. You could have shown Speedy trying to sleep, plugging his ears to keep out the noise, and warning his friends that their teasing is dangerous.

Sylvester ditches his cute outfit and hides in a barrel with some dynamite. Speedy rolls the barrel along which ends up trapping Sylvester in the container with a lit explosive and a dog. He gets a motorcycle and chases the mouse, who stops short at a cliff and lets the cat careen over the edge. Sylvester eventually gets out, but Speedy next leads him into a collision with a bus. Sylvester has no choice but to go to the “El Gato Infirmary” and get some casts on his broken bones. Speedy points out he dropped his flute. (“Don’t you want heem?” “No, I don’t want ‘heem’.”) Sylvester tells Speedy he can have it. The mouse plays and Sylvester is forced to dance after him on his broken foot. (That’s harsh.)

Personal Rating: 3

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Cannery Woe

“I don’t he like us also, too.”

Directed by Robert McKimson. Released in 1961

In what I think is the mouse version of the slums, two mice wake up. As is typical of Speedy shorts, (Is that a spoiler?) they have the names of Manuel and Jose. They are hungry, and I guess there either is no food for them, or they are just lazy, because they list off a bunch of potential people they could mooch off of but don’t like them anymore instead of deciding on where/what to eat. But it appears to be their lucky day! Mayor Raton, (Spanish for mouse) is holding a fiesta to encourage others to reelect him. He’s even giving away free cheese for everyone.

Except our main characters. They are kicked out. (Hypocrite.) Despite the fact they are unwelcome, they watch from atop a wall and show their support anyway. The mayor calls for the cheese committee to bring out the goods. They look like they’ve been to war. It turns out there is a new addition to the store where they have always gotten cheese. Namely a cat. All is lost! (American mice would go on anyway. And then be eaten. Patriotic pride is no match for mother nature.) Jose and Manuel somehow get in without being thrown out and offer to help. Seems they know of a very fast mouse who left Jose with a whistle to blow if he is ever needed. (Speedy would turn 8 this year. He’s still not more well known in his country?) They will call him if they are granted their demands. Which are whispered, as if we didn’t already know what they want. The mayor (and his nose that turned tan for a slight second) agrees and Speedy is summoned.

Speedy goes to the store where Sylvester once again, underestimates him. Speedy runs through his legs and tears some fur off. (“Speedy was here!”) And again on his way out. (“Also here!”) Sylvester lays some tacks down. Speedy goes around and the cat runs through them after him. (Twice.) He gets stuck lighting a cannon, but Speedy helps by pulling the cord. The cannonball somehow doesn’t hit Sylvester as it is fired but lands on his head. Sylvester sets up many mousetraps inside, but ends up cornering himself. Speedy tosses a ping-pong ball at them which sets them all off.

Having brought back enough cheese, the Mayor is true to his word and grants Jose and Manuel their request. To be the official cheese judges. As for Speedy? He gets to be the chick inspector. What does that even mean? Does he judge the females on how attractive they are and refuses the ugly ones the right to stay? Who knows? Pfft, Men. (For the third time.)

Personal Rating: 3

We regret to inform those who come by, that there will not be a new update next week. I’ll be going on a trip. We will resume afterwards. Stay Looney.